Jacob's Baby
by LeahAnne
Summary: Takes place in the middle of Breaking Dawn. AU. What would have happened if Edward convinced Bella to have Jacob's baby instead of Renesmee? Would it have affected her final decision on who she decided to be with?
1. Decision

Jacob's Baby

a fan fiction by iinstantstarr

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Disclaimer: I don't own anything you recognize. I own the plot. And, that's about it. Oh, and if I was Stephenie Meyer, Jacob Black would be mine. ;)

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Chapter 1 – Decision

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I never dreamed that Bella would actually listen to Edward when he suggested she have my baby to replace his. I don't know what he said to make her see sense… and I don't know if I ever will. When I came to the Cullens'… house, if that's what you wanted to call it (or coven, whichever term you prefer), I didn't expect for Edward to be waiting for me, either. He had said the tiny one, Alice, couldn't see anything with the future as long as it concerned me or La Push. So I was a little confused, to say the least.

"She agreed," Edward said, looking off toward the setting sun. "Just in the nick of time, too. Carlisle said that it would have only been another few days before the fetus would have become strong enough to cause serious damage."

I could tell he was hurting, but I wasn't sure of what to say. I tried to keep my thoughts to myself.

"I'm sorry," I said, sitting down across from him on the grass.

"Don't be," Edward said, sharply. "I'd rather have Bella than a child I've never met."

I nodded once more, telling my inner thoughts to shut up.

"You love her and you'll take care of her. That's the only reason why I'm agreeing to letting her stay with you during this… process. But you have to agree that the resulting child is Bella's and you'll have to let her live her own life with whomever she chooses. I realize that she may very well choose you after all of this is said and done. I love her enough to want her happy. As I told you before, if she wants a child, she'll get one." Edward seemed to only be talking to keep his mind busy at this point. I listened to him, mostly to keep my own thoughts from running wild.

"Did Carlisle already perform the… procedure, then?" I asked delicately.

"This morning," Edward said. "She's… distraught. She agreed to what I proposed, but she's still very upset. She realizes that her life was in danger and that there's no way I could have changed her while she was pregnant without terminating the pregnancy. But I don't know what could possibly fill that loss other than another child. I talked to Carlisle about when she could start trying again and he said her cycles will need to regulate themselves. He can give her a drug for that to speed it up."

I nodded. "Do you think she'd want to see me?" I asked.

"I think she'd be upset if she knew you were here and we sent you away without seeing her," Edward said, half smiling. "We moved her upstairs to my room. It has the best view of the mountains."

"Alright," I said. I headed in through the front door and spotted Blondie and the big one, Earl or whatever, curled up on the couch, sucking face.

"Get a room," I muttered.

Rosalie scowled at me but didn't say anything for once. I headed up the stairs, following Bella's scent, and took a right at the top of the staircase. At the end of the hall, I saw a bed in a room with the door open. I walked into the room, and saw Bella asleep with the faint trace of tears trailed down her cheek.

I knelt down next to her and tucked her hair behind her ear and then sat down next to the nightstand and leaned back onto it. I resolved to stay there until she woke up.

"Jacob?" a voice called from the hallway. It was Esme. "Are you hungry?"

"No," I said, as my stomach growled impatiently.

Esme smiled as she leaned against the doorframe. "I think otherwise. I figured you'd be coming today so when I made Bella's lunch, I made some extra. I put it back in the oven so it's warm. Lasagna. I'll bring you up a plate."

I smiled in embarrassment.

"Really, Esme," I said. "You don't need to go to so much effort. It's just me."

"It gives me the chance to actually use my kitchen. Don't feel like you're intruding."

I sighed. "Okay," I said, feeling it best not to argue.

Esme grinned and headed back down the hallway and down the stairs.

I leaned back and tilted my head up toward the ceiling and let my mind wander. I wondered what our baby would look like. Bella's eyes, skin a shade lighter than mine, my dark hair, her clumsiness, but tall like me. I tried not to laugh as I imagined our gangly kid tripping over his own two feet, just like his mom. The vision faded to me, lying in a bed, back at Billy's, banged-up leg and arm, while Bella worried and fussed over me. I wanted it more than I wanted air to breathe. And in some sense, I would get part of it. Bella and I would have a child together, but we would never _be_ together. The knowledge of that stung like a thousand needles piercing my heart. I wiped the tears threatening to fall down my cheeks away with one hand and looked back over at Bella.

Her eyes were open and she was staring at me.

I jumped. "How long have you been awake?" I asked her.

"Since Esme mentioned my name when she was asking you if you wanted lasagna," she answered. "Why are you crying?"

"I'm not crying," I said instantly.

"Yeah, sure," she said, rolling her eyes. "I forgot. Jacob's the big bad wolf who never cries or shows any emotion whatsoever."

"Whatever," I said, crossing my arms. "How are you feeling?" I asked her, changing the subject.

"Sore," Bella said. "Esme's been a great help so far. I guess she understands more than anyone else can though. She lost a child and she knows what the feeling's like."

My stomach tightened. "I'm so sorry, Bella," I said sincerely. I knew she was hurting and as happy as I was that the leeching monster was out of her, I still didn't like to see her unhappy or in pain.

"I know," Bella said. "But I still feel like I'm getting more than my fair share," she continued. "You know how I told you that I saw our whole lives mapped out in front of us? If I had chosen you?"

I nodded warily.

"Well, if I have our child, then it's going to be like I'm getting part of La Push and that life and my life with Edward and being a vampire… and it just seems like too much for one person. It doesn't seem fair."

I smirked.

"Well, that's if you choose him in the end," I reasoned.

"Jake!" Bella said, exasperatedly. "I'm married to him!"

"Yep," I said, nodding. "I forgot. You're Isabella Cullen now." My lips could barely form around her new name.

Bella sighed.

"Have you and Edward figured out when we're going to…" she trailed off, her cheeks pink in an adorable blush.

"Well, he's going to talk to Carlisle and then Carlisle's going to tell us how long it'll be until your cycles regulate themselves. And then I guess it's up to you and me."

"Oh," Bella said, looking out the window toward the mountains. "Where would we…"

I already knew the unspoken half of her question. "No offense, but I really don't want to do it here." I didn't want Edward reading my thoughts while I was sleeping with his wife. That would just be awkward.

"Of course not!" Bella looked aghast.

"I could probably get Billy to have Charlie come down for dinner on the nights we needed to be together," I thought. "And then, maybe at Charlie's in Forks?"

Bella nodded. "I still have my old house key." She sighed.

"What?" I asked, searching her face.

"I just never realized that being a mother was something I wanted. Not until I got pregnant. I just can't believe I'm actually going through with this. It just seems wrong," she said.

"Yeah, well, who decides what's right and wrong?" I asked. "Certainly not me or you."

Bella nodded.

I heard Esme coming up the stairs. She walked into the room with a heaping plate of lasagna.

"I hope this is enough," she said. "I wasn't sure how hungry you were or how much would fill you up."

"Thanks, Esme," I said, smiling at her appreciatively.

"You know," Bella said, "I never did get to see you eat that whole cow."

I blinked at her. "I don't think you'd _want_ to see that," I laughed.

"I can have Emmett go snag one from one of the farms in Oregon," Esme joked.

"I don't think that's necessary!" I exclaimed.

"What's going on with you and the pack?" Bella asked abruptly. Esme graciously let herself back out the door and I found myself telling Bella all about the current issues with Sam and how Leah and Seth had separated themselves from Sam's pack and formed the little gang they called "Jacob's pack."

Bella's eyes grew wide.

"Now, I can really call you Chief Jacob," she giggled.

"More like Alpha Jacob," I said.

"Yes, Most High Alpha. What can I do for you today, Oh Great One?"

I smirked.

"There are several things you could do for me, but none of them I can say right here," I said, grinning.

Bella's jaw dropped and she smacked me over the head.

"Jacob!" she gasped.

"Hey, I'm kidding," I laughed.

"You better be," she said, crossing her arms. She sighed. "So what are you going to do?"

"About what? Seth and Leah's obnoxious plan to make me Alpha of a second pack?"

"Exactly," Bella said, looking at me with concern written on her face.

"I don't know yet," I admitted. "Leah already says it's hard enough to be around Sam without him being able to look into her head and see exactly what she's thinking. And in a way, I know what she means. It's just… I don't know what to do right now."

"I'm sorry," Bella said, looking guilty.

"For what?" I asked, confused.

"You said you kind of know what she means… to be around someone when you love them but you know you can't be with them. I guess that's my fault."

I looked at her, aghast. "Bella, don't think like that. You can't choose who you fall in love with. I've known that for a while."

She looked back out the window.

"You know, I could kind of see you and Leah being together," she said, grinning.

"Yeah," I huffed. "Right."

"No, really. You seem to have a lot in common."

"Like what?" I challenged.

"Losing a parent, being a werewolf, having your heart broken…" she trailed off.

"Bella, quit trying to tell me who I should be with. That's really none of your business," I said, a little sharper than I intended.

"I know. I'm sorry," she apologized again.

"Stop apologizing," I said, looking down at the floor.

"I just want you to be happy," she said. "That's all I've ever wanted for you."

"I know," I sighed, looking up at the ceiling, trying not to look her in the face.

"You have no idea how much I wish I could love you like you want me to love you," she murmured. "But in the end, I can't choose you over him. He's just too much of who I am. I can't explain it right. You're my personal sun, but I need him like I need air to breathe."

"He's like a drug, Bella," I said. "I've always said that."

"I respect your opinion, but in the end, I chose to marry him. I do love him. He's not just around for convenience, Jacob."

"Okay," I said, finally looking at her. "As long as you're happy."

"I am," she said, smiling. "I am happy."

"Good," I said, trying to think of something else to talk about.

"You know, our kid is going to be pretty freakin' gorgeous," she said, laughing.

"Really?" I asked, feigning surprise. "I had no idea!"

"Just think," Bella said, looking up toward the ceiling. "Dark hair, dark skin, brown eyes, tall…" she trailed off.

"Well, its skin won't be as dark as mine and you have to factor in that you're going to be its mother… hopefully it won't be so clumsy," I teased.

Bella nudged me.

"Whatever," she said. "Tease me all you want now. Eventually, I'll be as big as a whale and you won't be able to tease me."

I grinned. She had no idea how much I was looking forward to seeing her body round with my child. It sent a thrill through me.

A soft knock at the door made her look up. I had been so enthralled in the conversation that I hadn't even noticed Edward's approaching footsteps.

"How are you feeling, love?" Edward asked, coming over to sit on the bed next to her.

"I'm fine," Bella said, crossing her arms.

I swallowed back the vomit threatening to spew across the French duvet Bella was wrapped in.

"Are you cold? Hot? Hungry?" he asked, searching her eyes.

"I'm fine," she said a little louder.

I found it funny that I could tell what she was thinking and how she was feeling quicker than he could, with his whole mind-reading thing.

Edward glared at me as that crossed my mind.

Bella shifted to draw her feet closer to her.

"Your feet are cold," Edward said, frowning.

"Obviously. Now can you not touch them?" she snapped.

I glared at Edward and reached my hand under the duvet and touched her feet. They were ice cold. She jumped at the warmth of my hand and pressed her toes eagerly against my hand.

"Jeez, Bells. Your feet are freezing!" I gasped.

"Let me get a space-heater in here," Edward said, turning to head into the hallway.

"You know that's not really necessary," I said. "I'm right here, running a toasty 108.9."

Edward just glared at me menacingly.

"You two knock it off," Bella sighed.

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_I've been playing with this idea in my head for a while now. I just now had the opportunity to write it all out. I'm a Jacob/Leah shipper myself, but the brief mentioning of this in _Breaking Dawn _was enough to get my fan fiction writing gears a-turnin'. Anyway, hope you enjoyed this chapter. Please remember to review._

_Thanks!!

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	2. Let's Talk About Sex

Chapter 2 – Let's Talk About Sex

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Disclaimer: If I owned Twilight, Jacob Black would belong to me. And I would be a very rich lady, just like Stephenie Meyer. And I would be able to write all of the time instead of have a real job.

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Like every red-blooded American boy, I'd had the sex talk with my dad. Billy was very detailed and awkward about the whole thing too. He told me that if I ever decided to have sex with anyone, I'd need to use protection and all of that stuff. Seems like he was preaching to the choir on that one though, considering he doesn't even know if Embry is his kid or not.

But whatever. I doubted that Billy was going to be thrilled that I was having unprotected sex on purpose to conceive a baby out of wedlock. But he had also told me that you had to do whatever you could to win over the person that you wanted to spend the rest of your life with. That would have meant Bella. And even though she was married, I was going to do my damnedest to make sure she chose me over the bloodsucker. Even if it meant knocking her up with my kid when she was married to him. It was a last ditch effort on my part.

I ended up going to the Cullens' lair to hang out with Bella. I had nothing else to do that day. I was surprised to find her sitting on the front porch swing, looking out toward the dirt path that led toward the woods.

She saw me coming and grinned broadly. I headed up the steps, looking at her in confusion.

"What are you so happy about?" I asked her.

"Carlisle checked me over this morning and said that it looks like I'm ovulating again," she said.

"Okay?" I asked stupidly, waiting for some sort of clarification on what she was talking about.

"Meaning I've been given the clear so we can start trying for a baby…" she trailed off. "You haven't changed your mind, have you?" she asked nervously.

I could hear the realization of what she was saying clunk in my head. "Oh!" I said, shaking my head to clear it. "Of course not."

"Well, Edward said that you were on your way and that's why I'm waiting here," she said lamely.

"When I left, Charlie was in our living room," I said. "They're watching the season openers for college football."

"Do you want to go now, then?" she asked.

I gaped at her.

"Or not…" she trailed off. "We could just do it later…"

"It's not that," I said. "I just didn't come here, expecting…"

"Yeah, I know," she said. "That was stupid on my part. I'm sorry."

"You really need to stop apologizing," I said, smiling at her.

"I'm sorry," she said, before she could stop herself. I just shook my head.

"Let me go back to the rez and get the Rabbit," I ventured. "And I'll come pick you up, okay?" I asked, seeking her reassurance.

"Okay," she said, biting her bottom lip awkwardly.

I was back at the Cullens' compound within half an hour. Bella climbed into the Rabbit's passenger side seat, a strange expression on her face.

"So what is this?" she asked.

"What's what?" I asked her, looking around the dashboard of the Rabbit to see if there was anything new that she hadn't seen before. It'd been a while since I'd had the time and energy to work on it.

"This… with me and you," she defined. "It's just… sex, right?" she said, awkwardly.

"Do we need to put a label on everything?" I asked her. "I mean, you and Edward make love or whatever…" I tried to push away the images inside my head that came unbidden.

Bella blushed scarlet.

"Crude sex. That's all this is. You want a baby, I provide the sperm," I said, ignoring the twisting feeling in my stomach.

"Jake," Bella sighed.

"Or would you rather call it a series of one-night stands?" I asked her. "Labels don't do anything but create awkwardness."

"Let's just not make this any harder than what it already is," Bella said. "You know I love you. I don't love you quite as much as I love Edward, but I do have feelings for you. I just don't want this to mess up our friendship."

"So, what?" I asked Bella. "You can just teach me how to have sex," I goaded her. "We can do artificial insemination using my penis."

At that, Bella just gaped at me.

"I'm kidding," I said. "I was just trying to make you laugh."

"Well, you're doing a pretty pathetic job of it," she said, shaking her head.

"Maybe," I admitted.

A few minutes later, we pulled up to Charlie's house. We got out and Bella pulled her key out of her back pocket and opened the door. Bella shut the door behind me and locked it.

I walked into the kitchen.

"Don't even think about raiding the refrigerator," Bella teased.

"I wouldn't dream of it," I laughed. I noticed the flowers on the table and the blue checkered tablecloth. Bella looked around, furrowing her brow.

"Is it just me, or does it definitely look a little more feminine since Sue's been over here?" I asked Bella.

Bella frowned. "I think things might be getting a little more serious between my dad and Sue," she said. "There haven't been flowers on the table since before Mom left."

I frowned.

"You don't think she's _living_ here, do you?" I asked Bella.

"Surely not," she said instantly.

Bella ran upstairs and looked into the bathroom.

"The shower curtain!" she crowed. "And the medicine cabinet!"

I stifled my laughter.

"Looks like Charlie's got himself a girlfriend," I grinned.

"I guess so!" Bella exclaimed, coming back down the stairs. I caught her around the waist once she was at the same level as me and looked into her eyes. She looked at me in confusion.

I brought my lips to hers and she kissed me back. I was so shocked that I pulled back and frowned.

"What?" she asked me.

"I'm just used to you pushing me away or hitting me or breaking your hands," I replied.

"Well, I have sort of given you permission to have your way with me, haven't I?" she asked. "I think it'd be a little bit harder for things to progress if we kept this clinical and detached."

I didn't fight her theory. I pulled her close to me and brought my lips back to hers once more.

She broke away and grabbed my hand and pulled me up the stairs. I was confused by her eagerness. Shouldn't she be a little more reserved about this whole thing?

She led me to her old bedroom, a place I'd only been once before. The walls were a dusty purple, the bedspread a more royal shade.

"It's cold in here," she said, shivering. "Dad always kept it cold. Said it saved on the electric bill."

"You'll be glad it's cold later," I said. "You always complain that I make you so hot you sweat," I reminded her.

A faint smile crept across Bella's face.

"Alright," she said. "So we're really going to do this?"

"I guess so," I said. "If you really want to."

"You know I wouldn't do this if there were other options. I don't want you thinking I'm taking advantage of your feelings just to have a baby."

"I know," I said. "Can you just be quiet so we can get this over with?" I asked her.

"Sure thing," she said, sitting up on the bed. I leaned over to her and kissed her ever so softly, trying to relish the sensation. My heart pounded furiously as Bella's mouth opened up to me, deepening the kiss.

Without breaking the kiss, I leaned on top of her, pushing her down onto the bed. My hand traveled up to her shoulder and I pushed the part of her shirt covering it over enough to expose her neck. Slowly, I broke our kiss and trailed lighter kisses down her jaw line toward her neck. I was surprised as she leaned into me.

Bella let out a small gasp and I felt her weight collapse under me. As I made my way down her neck, she tilted her head, granting me easier access.

I cautiously brought my hands back toward her hips and placed them on either side of her waist. I brought my hands upward, taking her shirt with them. She raised her arms up as I took it off of her and leaned over to drape it across her desk chair. I continued my downward path of kisses until I reached the top of her cleavage. Pulling back, I took her in, the way her head was tilted, her rapid breathing, her parted lips. She was the epitome of wanton desire and it made my heart pound.

Her eyes opened, searching for me and before she could speak, I leaned forward and gently kissed her eyes closed again.

"Do you trust me?" I asked her, my voice no louder than a soft whisper.

She nodded wordlessly, unbuttoning her khaki skirt and sliding it down her legs. She tossed it to the floor and looked back up at me hesitantly.

I pushed my hand underneath her and unfastened the back of her bra, pulling it off of her in a single stroke. Her eyes opened and met mine. She bit her bottom lip in apprehension. I could tell she was nervous.

"God, you're beautiful," I told her.

Once again, she blushed vividly.

I slowly slid one hand up and cupped her breast, letting my fingertips softly stroke the side. She arched into my hand, and I slowly drew my thumb over her nipple, eliciting a small gasp from her. I slowly bent down, bringing my mouth over it, drawing small circles over it with my tongue, gently flicking over the tip.

I felt her fingers tangle into my hair and she held me to her breast. A shock of pleasure shot down my spine. I picked up my pace, sucking and nibbling lightly. She moaned softly. As I continued to suckle her breast, I brought a hand down her torso. My fingers grazed the edge of the curls between her legs, under her panties. I stopped and pulled them down her legs. Looking up at her, I stopped apprehensively before slowly pushing my fingers through her coarse strands.

I could feel the muscles in her thighs tense a little and I slid my hand over slightly to caress one of her thighs, letting my fingers brush ever so slowly closer to her center. By the time she had relaxed enough, I had shifted my mouth back up to hers, capturing it into a chaste kiss.

"Hurry up, Jake," Bella moaned, biting down on her bottom lip again. This time, I obliged, letting my fingers slip into her folds.

I was surprised to feel her slick and wet. I let my fingers slide over her center and she gasped into my mouth, her hips bucking against my every touch. I continued to tease her, trailing my fingers over her center, then going back up toward her navel. Soon, she was wiggling and shifting to keep my hand right where she wanted it. I eventually gave in to her, stroking her firmly, relishing in the sounds she was making for me and for me alone.

As her body tensed and arched up off the bed, I slipped my other hand under her and pulled her close to me. Her breathing was now ragged and labored. I pressed my aching groin against her thigh. I sensed that she was getting close now, so I increased the speed and pressure of my strokes. Bella came, crying out and convulsing against me. The sound of her moaning my name was like heaven to my ears.

As she lay panting next to me, I got up and self-consciously took off my sweatpants. I could feel her gaze on me. I blushed, trying to ignore the fact that she was watching me. Now naked, I climbed back onto the bed and stretched out Bella. Kissing her lightly on her lips, I nudged my leg between hers and reached down to pull one of her knees up slightly. I looked into her eyes, willing her to know that I wanted this more than anything. Her hands slid around my back and pulled me close to her.

"Are you sure?" I asked her, nervously.

"Of course," Bella said, her voice rough and ragged.

I kissed her deeply and slowly pushed myself into her. The sensation of her enveloping me was incredible. I was amazed to hear her softly groan aloud, "Oh God… Jake!"

I was nearly all the way into her when I felt a little resistance. I looked into her eyes and she bit her bottom lip, her eyes showing the slightest hint of pain.

"Keep going," she murmured. I tried to push all doubt and confusion out of my mind. I slowly began moving, keeping my strokes steady, hoping she'd grow accustomed to me. She slowly began to thrust against me, trying to match my rhythm. I reached down again and hooked her leg around my waist. She automatically moved her other leg around me and moaned deep in her throat as I slid even further into her.

I was totally lost in all that was Bella. My fingers slid through her hair and my mouth devoured hers. My body tingled in pleasure as her hands slipped up along the sides of my chest, her fingers wrapping gently around to my back. I groaned as her fingertips bit into my flesh. I was spurred on by her touch. I increased my pace and began pounding into her, doing everything I could to keep from coming on the spot. She kept gasping, moaning my name, begging for more. I was in awe.

With just a few more thrusts, she cried out and convulsed around me. Her inner walls shivered against me and I tensed up, grunting as my own release came. I collapsed, trying to shift the bulk of my weight to one side.

We lay there, our heartbeats gradually slowing… our breathing returning to normal. I had never experienced anything so amazing, so magical in my life. I had no idea how she felt about the entire thing, but I knew right then that there was nowhere else in the world that I'd rather be. I didn't care about anything right now except for the woman lying next to me.

"Where did you learn that?" she asked a few minutes later, turning on her side to face me.

"What?" I asked intelligently.

"You're a virgin, right?" she asked.

"Was," I corrected her. "I peg it all down to a lot of alone time and _Cosmopolitan_," I laughed.

"_Cosmopolitan?_" Bella asked, her eyes wide.

"I have two older sisters. What do you expect?" I asked her. "I went through their stuff when I was a hormonal teenage boy."

Bella snorted.

"How many times do you think we'll have to do this before you get pregnant?" I asked her.

"Well," Bella said, slowly. "Edward succeeded on the first try."

"Well, I guess that gives me an awful lot to live up to," I laughed.

"Well, in my opinion, you've already beat out Edward in one way," Bella said, a slight smirk on her face.

"Well, how's that?" I asked her.

"Well, let's just say that you're bigger than Edward in more ways than one," Bella said, stifling her own laughter.

I felt like I had won a million dollars.

"So that's why you were in a little bit of discomfort," I said, awkwardly.

Bella just nodded. She leaned into me. "You're so warm," she murmured.

"Or so I've been told," I grinned. She leaned into me and kissed me.

"You're not going to go run back to Edward and just have sex with him now, are you?" I asked her apprehensively.

Bella looked at me aghast.

"Of course not!" she exclaimed. "And even if I was, how is that any of your business?" she asked me.

"It's not," I said. "But I don't think I could bear it if I knew you were being bounced back and forth like a chess piece," I said, looking into her eyes fiercely.

"That's not going to happen," Bella sighed. "If you must know, Edward and I decided that we weren't going to make love again until after I was already pregnant. He doesn't want a repeat of last time to happen. It's his biggest fear that he'll get me pregnant again. He doesn't want me to have to go through losing another child."

I nodded, thankful that Edward appeared to be taking care of her.

"Are you ready to take me back home?" she asked me, placing one small hand on my chest.

"I suppose," I lied. "Do I need to pick you up again anytime soon?" I asked her. "I don't really want to hang around there if I don't need to. It's just… awkward," I said.

"Well, Carlisle said that it was best to have intercourse every other day while I'm ovulating. So if you want to pick me up Thursday, you can."

I nodded. I leaned over Bella and picked up my sweatpants. Once they were in my hand, I moved to put them on. Bella stopped me and kissed me lightly on the lips.

"Thank you for being so understanding," she murmured. "I don't know what I did to deserve a friend like you."

I smiled back at her, faking sincerity as I put my sweatpants back on and tossed her clothes onto the bed.

A friend. That's all I was. And that's all I was assured that I'd ever be. It felt like a knife stabbing me in the chest.

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_Hope you guys liked this chapter! Please remember to review! I could always use suggestions for the story and what you liked and didn't like. _

_Thanks!!_


	3. Edward's Jealousy

Chapter 3 – Edward's Jealousy

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Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight. If you honestly believe I do, come on over to my house. Jacob Black is not here.

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As I'd too often told Jacob, Edward's jealousy was something that he definitely did not want to deal with. As much as I loved my husband, I knew he had jealousy issues. And when his jealousy concerned me, he was like a hormonal Rosalie engaged in battle. The loss of my child was not something I'd taken lightly and Edward knew I was upset. But he being upset because I was upset was not something I really needed. I'd spent most of Wednesday morning away from him, which was hard to do because he always wanted to be around me. I think that had a lot to do with the fact that I'd had sex with Jacob on Tuesday. And although Jacob was nowhere to be seen since our encounter, Edward wasn't happy.

Eventually, I got so sick and tired of Edward being in my face, boring holes into my head, I went upstairs to seek out Alice. I knew she'd say something to Edward to make him leave me alone, especially if I was in her company.

She was in one of the spare rooms upstairs.

"What are you doing?" I asked her, frowning.

"I'm trying to figure out which room is going to be yours," she said. "There are two spare rooms. One obviously has to be the nursery and the other has to be your room."

"Nursery?" I said, smiling broadly. "So I'm actually going to have a baby, then?"

"You are," Alice said. "Or at least, for now, you are. But that's all I can tell. I don't think I'll actually be able to see the baby." She pouted, folding her arms. "So right now, I'm trying to decide what room would look better yellow and what room would look better purple."

"Purple?" I asked, blankly.

"It was the color of your old bedroom at Charlie's, according to Edward. I figured you'd want something to remind you of home, so the color of the walls in your room would be rather reminiscent of that, I think," she said. "But that's all I'm going to tell you!"

I sighed. Alice was always the one for surprises. I often thought it was because nothing surprised her, so she had to make up for it by surprising everyone else.

I sat down in the window seat in the room Alice was currently surveying.

"Something's up between you and Edward," she stated, her eyes flashing to me.

"I'm just a little annoyed with him right now, that's all," I said. "He won't give me five minutes of breathing space."

"You know he's just jealous of Jacob," Alice said, placing her hands on her hips. "I mean, Jacob is about to give you the one thing Edward tried and failed to give you. A child. A mark like that stays put and Edward's just afraid that you're going to see your child in the end and then choose Jacob over him. It's a fair concern, I suppose."

"But you're not worried," I said, looking at her.

"No," Alice said. "Because I know you loved Edward enough to marry him and you fought tooth and nail for your baby until Carlisle told you that having him would have killed you which would have killed Edward. And besides, I can see your future right now and I still see you becoming one of us. Until that changes, I have no reason to worry."

I nodded.

"We still have to think of baby names!" Alice grinned.

"Baby names?" I said, blankly. "But I already know what I plan on naming the baby," I protested.

"Really," Alice said, rolling her eyes. "And what's that?"

"Edward Jacob for a boy or Norah Alice for a girl."

"You're planning on naming the baby after me if it's a girl?" Alice crowed.

"I don't see why not," I said.

She grinned.

"Norah's a family name on Jacob's side," I continued. "It was his mom's name."

"But you realize you can't name the baby Edward Jacob if it's a boy," Alice said.

"Why?" I asked. "That's what I was going to name the other baby…" I trailed off.

"Exactly," Alice said. "I don't know how Jacob would take it if you named your child after Edward when the baby is going to be half-Quileute and not even Edward's biological child."

I could have smacked myself.

"Then what do you suggest?" I asked Alice.

Alice thought for a second. "What about Jacob as the middle name and then another name that starts with E?" she suggested. "Emerson Jacob, Eli Jacob, Edmund Jacob, Errol Jacob, Enrique Jacob, Ephraim Jacob…" she trailed off.

"I am not naming my son Errol or Enrique. And I'm not naming the baby after one of the old chiefs of the Quileute tribe, either," I groaned.

"Yeah, okay, so maybe not. But I don't think Edward or Jacob would be very happy if you named your baby Edward Jacob," she said.

"Well, maybe the baby will be a girl and we won't have to worry about that," I sighed.

"I'd like it to be a girl. If you have a choice, make it a girl," Alice grinned.

"I don't think it works like that," I laughed.

We heard something thunder downstairs. Alice and I locked eyes for a fraction of a second and we flew out to the stairwell landing.

"Emmett, Edward, calm down." Carlisle was standing between Emmett and Edward with his arms outstretched, acting as a shield between them. Jasper was standing a few feet off, concentrating. I knew from past experiences that he was trying to control the mood of the room and get everyone's emotions back under control.

"That was completely OUT OF LINE, Emmett!" Edward yelled. I'd never seen him this angry before and it scared me. I looked around toward Alice, seeking reassurance. I heard her inhale sharply behind me.

"Edward, calm down," Carlisle said again. "Or I will take you outside."

Esme was coming up the stairs, Rosalie trailing her.

"What happened?" Alice murmured.

"Emmett said something he shouldn't have," Esme said, looking back down on the scene. She glanced at me quickly and then back at Alice.

"Like?" I asked, confused.

"Emmett just said Edward needs to watch his girl or he might not have her much longer because Jacob means business. It wasn't like he said something completely untrue," Rosalie said, glaring at me.

"I'm not leaving Edward," I said simply. "I love him. Besides, leaving Edward would mean leaving all of you and I'm not doing that. It's not an option. Emmett knows that."

"I think he was probably only saying it to get Edward riled up. Emmett's been itching for a fight for a few days now and it's been a while since we've been hunting," Esme said, sighing. "We'll probably go Thursday, while you're… busy," she said delicately.

"Well, he obviously succeeded in getting Edward riled up," Alice said, wincing at the expression on his face.

"Have you figured out what you're going to do if your baby's a boy and he follows in his father's footsteps?" Rosalie asked me. "What if your baby turns into a werewolf when he gets older and being around his own parents causes him physical discomfort?"

I sighed.

"I guess that's just a risk I'm willing to take," I said, glaring at her.

I walked over to Edward's room and sat down on the cream-colored chaise in the corner and opened a book and began reading. I figured Edward would come into his room when he needed to talk. As much as he was annoying me right now, I knew he needed to hear that I wasn't leaving him, that that was the last thing on my mind.

It took him an hour, but he eventually found me.

"If the last place I look is the first place I find you, then maybe I should look where I'm planning on looking last first," he said philosophically.

I smiled, marking where I had left off in the book and closing it. I got up as he walked into the room.

"Are you okay?" I asked him.

"A little stressed, but I should be asking you how you're doing," he said.

"Not when you're not in the best of moods yourself," I said. "I heard what happened between you and Emmett a while ago."

"He shouldn't have said anything. Our relationship is none of his business," he snapped.

"Edward, you know I love you. And you should know that I'm not leaving you. Not now, and not ever. Just because I'll be having Jacob's baby does nothing for the way I feel toward him. Just because he loves me doesn't mean I love him more than I love you."

"But Bella," Edward insisted, "I'm not rescinding my offer to Jacob. I'm just saying, you don't know how you're going to feel once his child is in your arms. Who knows what you'll be thinking then? So yes, I'm going to worry because I don't want to lose you."

"You're not going to," I replied, placing my hands on his triceps. "I love you, Edward Cullen. And I'll love you now, and tomorrow, and for the rest of eternity."

"I wish I knew you were going to believe that in nine months," Edward sighed.

I groaned. "You know when Jacob kissed me and said that I still had a choice and he was still fighting and would be until my heart stops beating?"

"How could I forget?" Edward grimaced.

"Just because Jacob's fighting doesn't mean he's going to win. I know who I want," I promised him. "So please stop being so angry! I don't like you like this. It scares me."

"I'm sorry," Edward apologized. He sat down on the chaise and sat me down in his lap, stroking my hair.

"Everything is going to be okay. You just have to have faith in me," I said, kissing him lightly on his lips.

"Okay," Edward murmured, kissing me back.

Jacob showed back up right at noon on Thursday. I was so sick of the drama that had been flying around the house that I was almost desperate to leave.

I hopped into the passenger side seat of the Rabbit and buckled up.

"You seem excited," Jacob noted.

"I'm just sick and tired of vampire drama," I said. "I'm ready for some werewolf drama now."

"Well, I've got some interesting werewolf drama for you," Jacob grinned.

"What's that?" I asked him.

"Sam and Emily are having a baby," he said. "And Leah Clearwater is really starting to get on my nerves."

"Well," I reasoned. "That's probably pretty hard on her. I mean, she was in love with Sam for a very long time. And it probably came out of nowhere. I mean, Sam and Emily's wedding isn't until next summer…"

"I guess," Jacob said, sighing. "She actually asked me if I thought that if it was her in that situation, Sam would have been at least taken by surprise or if it would have affected him at all. I told her Sam cares about her, as a friend and it wouldn't be anything more than that. She ran off into the woods, upset. Girls," he said, shaking his head.

I tried to hide my smile.

"So where are we going?" I asked him.

"I figured we could go hiking today," Jacob said.

"Hiking?" I asked, frowning. "You realize that I am Isabella Marie Cullen and I am still just as clumsy as I was when my name was Isabella Marie Swan. Nothing has changed."

"Well, I thought hiking through a muddy creek could be fun," Jacob said. "Then we can go back to my place and wash our clothes if we need to, before I take you back to the vampires' lair." He held his hands out like claws and I couldn't help but giggle.

"Why would I want to hike through a muddy creek?" I asked him, my brows furrowed in confusion.

"Because it's with your bestest buddy, Jake?" he pleaded, giving me puppy-dog eyes.

"Oh, fine," I said. "But if I get hurt, you're taking the blame."

"Eddie won't like that," Jacob scowled. "I'll have to make sure I follow you every step of the way and hold your hand, huh?"

I bristled at his sarcasm.

"Okay, okay," he said. "I'm sorry. Can we go now?" he asked, pulling the Rabbit over into a ditch on near the La Push border. He grabbed a backpack lying in the floorboard of the backseat.

"Fine," I sighed.

Jacob jumped out of the car and opened my door, half pulling me out of the car. He grabbed my hand and yanked me to an opening in the trees. I barely had enough time to slam the door of the Rabbit shut.

Jacob double-checked my feet. "I'm glad you're not wearing flip-flops," he said.

"You don't wear shoes at all, so what's the point?" I asked him.

"Yeah, but my feet are worn in already. Yours aren't," he said, folding his arms. "The more you walk around barefoot, the easier it is on your feet."

I rolled my eyes at his logic.

"Well, a normal person doesn't need to walk around barefoot. Excuse me for being the normal one."

He hid his laughter. "So a normal person runs around with vampires and werewolves," he grimaced. "I'm glad that's your definition of normal."

I sighed. "So where are we going?" I asked him.

"My favorite place on the reservation. I don't think I've showed you this place. It's where I go when I need to think. My mom used to take me up here when I was little and tell me stories of shape shifters and spirits. I never actually thought any of those stories were true…" he trailed off, looking into the dried-up riverbed that cut through the reservation. The trail continued on the other side of the riverbed, cutting through the tree line. We continued to follow the trail.

I was surprised that things weren't awkward between me and Jake, especially concerning the events that had taken place less than 48 hours beforehand. He hadn't brought it up at all and I had no way to know whether or not he was thinking about it.

"You know, Edward's been staying away from me the last few days," Jacob said. "The last time I saw him was when we decided we were going to go through with all of this."

"I've tried to stay away from him since yesterday," I said, moving a branch away from my face. He won't stop staring at me. It'd seem that after being with me for two years, he'd know that no matter how hard he stares at me, he's never going to be able to read my mind."

Jacob smirked, looking ahead down the path.

"He's jealous," he said simply.

"And you aren't?" I shot back.

Jacob just sighed.

"I know who you've chosen. And I know you're never going to leave Edward for me, so I deal with the hand I've been dealt. I love you and I'm going to do whatever I can to make you happy. And so is Edward. But we both know that you've chosen him and not me. I don't know why he's freaking out the way he is. He doesn't have a reason to. It just baffles me that Edward is jealous of me when I've been jealous of him for the past two years."

"They should just clone me," I said. "That way you could have one of me and then Edward could have the other."

"I don't think I'd be happy with a clone," Jacob laughed. "There's just something about you…" he sighed.

I was too busy paying attention to Jacob's facial expression that I tripped over a log he'd just stepped over, lying in front of the entrance to the clearing he had been talking about. I fell onto the ground, my knee scraping itself across a large boulder big enough for me to sit on.

Jacob whirled around and was down in front of me like a flash.

"Lucky for you, I brought a first aid kit," he muttered. He took off the backpack and opened a front compartment, pulling out a clear plastic container with a makeshift Red Cross logo across the front in red duct tape. I couldn't help but laugh as I got up to sit on the boulder.

He pulled out an antibacterial disinfectant and cleaned the wound before sticking a Harry Potter Band-Aid across it. This one was decorated with Remus Lupin in werewolf form.

"I thought the werewolf was appropriate," he grinned, looking up at me. His face was mere inches from mine.

Before I knew what I was doing, I had leaned down and kissed him softly on the lips. When I pulled back a few seconds later, his eyes were closed. He opened them, looking at me with an unspoken question in his eyes.

I sighed. "Why does this have to be so hard?" I murmured.

"Let me guess," he said, resting his chin on unhurt knee. "You can't have both of us, and you can't choose one over the other?"

"Something like that," I sighed.

"He hasn't changed you yet. You still have time. And you won't have to make a decision until after the baby's born," he reasoned.

"But Jacob, we don't know if there _is_ a baby yet," I said. "Nothing's changed."

"True," he said. "But we can get to work on that," he said so softly that I wasn't really sure that's what he had said. All I knew was that all of a sudden, Jacob was kissing me, really kissing me, and I was kissing him back and I couldn't feel or see anything that _wasn't_ Jacob.

I could feel myself pressing against him, wanting more, _needing_ more.

"Do you think we should really do this here?" Jacob breathed, his eyes wide with something… maybe apprehension? "I mean, we're in the middle of the woods…"

"What's the chance of someone walking in on us?" I asked him, my heart racing.

"Very remote, but – "

"Alright then," I said, cutting him off with another kiss. I let my hands make their way up his chest, marveling at how warm and soft he was. I wasn't used to my hands pressing into someone, wasn't used to how my pressure actually meant something, wasn't used to how _different_ this felt compared to how it was with Edward.

I slid down the boulder slowly, letting him have control. His hands trailed up my ribcage and over my breasts, taking my shirt off. I helped him with it and threw it back over the log I'd tripped over.

"You know," I said, blushing. "This is sort of fitting."

He looked at me in confusion. "What do you mean?" he asked.

"Just that you smell rather…woodsy. Musky, kind of." I gestured to the woods around us and the dirt path underneath us. "The woods are rather… reminiscent of you."

Jacob grinned and leaned in to kiss my shoulder.

"You know what you smell like?" he asked. "You always talk about what I smell like and what _he_ smells like, but I don't think anyone's told you what _you_ smell like."

"And what's that?" I asked him.

"My favorite smell in the world… strawberries and vanilla," he groaned, trailing one hand back down to my jeans. He unbuttoned them nearly effortlessly while trailing his kisses further down to my cleavage. I lifted my hips up so he could pull my jeans down.

I leaned back and unfastened my bra, giving him greater access to my chest. He leaned back and pulled it off and then kissed me ever so softly on the lips. I couldn't help but moan when he pulled away.

He leaned back down and began suckling my left breast, his right hand trailing down my side, his left hand supporting my head on the dirt path. I held him there, my head tilted back in ecstasy, feeling all of the strange feelings wash over me.

He pulled my jeans as far down as they would go, not bothering to take off my shoes. His right hand trailed down toward my underwear and these too, he pulled down. Suddenly, I felt him massaging me, his fingers trailing ever so lightly across my sensitive bud. I moaned louder.

"Shh…" Jacob crooned. "You don't want the entire reservation hearing you, do you?" he laughed.

"Right now, I could care less," I growled, my hips grinding into his hand, wanting more.

He obliged, sticking one finger into me, then two. I rode his fingers, faster and faster, trying to find my release. I was at the brink of climaxing when he pulled his fingers away at the last minute.

"Jake…" I whined. He rested my head on the dirt path.

"Not yet," he said, kissing me passionately, pulling his sweatpants down. He wrapped his arms around me, holding me and slowly pushed himself inside of me.

I moaned my loudest yet, feeling him fill me.

"Hush, honey," he murmured into my ear. He picked up his pace, thrusting in and out of me at a constant, drilling rhythm. My pants kept my legs from going any wider and I knew I must have felt tighter to him. He hadn't felt quite so big last time. It was on the brink of being uncomfortable, but not quite. He was hitting all the right places.

"Oh, God… Jacob… Jake…" I moaned, fighting to keep my voice barely above a whisper.

"That's right, honey," Jacob groaned, his lips meeting mine in yet another kiss. I could feel my walls tightening as my climax washed over me. Mine initiated his and he groaned, spilling into me. He collapsed to my right side, his breathing erratic and ragged.

He pulled me into his arms, kissing my shoulder. Jacob sighed and I knew he felt contented. However, my mind was running a thousand miles a minute. I was so confused. How could I feel like this with Jacob when I was irrevocably in love with my husband? What did I feel with Jacob? Was it just an emotional high while we were having sex? Or was it something else? I sighed.

Jacob's head snapped up. A few seconds later, I heard voices in the distance. Jacob jumped up and I pulled my pants up and grabbed my shirt. I threw it on. We ran back down the path and jumped into the Rabbit.

"Who was that?" I asked him.

"It sounded like Embry and Quil," he said, sighing. He rested his head on the steering wheel. "I don't know what they were doing down there. That's MY territory," he groaned. "The only people allowed there are me and Seth and Leah."

"More werewolf drama," I laughed.

"Oh shush," he said, looking at me. "You look terrible," he grinned wolfishly.

"Yeah, I forgot to tell you. I was running around through the woods a bit ago…" I grinned back.

Jacob pulled his wife beater over his head and I buttoned my pants. I looked around for my bra, but it was nowhere to be seen.

"Uh, Jacob?" I groaned.

"What?" he asked, frowning at my expression.

"I think I left my bra back there," I said, blushing with embarrassment.

Jacob's jaw dropped. He got back out of the Rabbit and headed back into the forest. He came back about a minute later and tossed it to me, shaking his head.

"Lucky for you, they didn't notice it. Now _that_ would have led to some discussion," he said, rolling his eyes. "At least you look sexy when you're dirty." He grinned at me when my jaw dropped. He started the engine and we headed back to his house on the other side of the reservation.

* * *

  
_So, this chapter was really really long for me. I got to writing and I couldn't find a good stopping point. So hopefully, this isn't _too_ long. It's the longest chapter I've ever written. Just over 4,000 words… 10 pages! Haha. __J__ But anyway, I hope you guys enjoyed the chapter. Don't forget to review! I'd like to know who you guys want to see Bella with… Edward or Jacob. Of course, I already know who she's going to end up with, but I'd kind of like to know what kind of shippers readers are. __J_

_I'd also like to know what sex you'd like the baby to be. I'm kind of torn on that part. I can see good things on either side._

_At any rate, thanks for reading! I'm really excited to see what you guys think!_

_Thanks for reading!_

_xoxo_


	4. Guilty Conscience

Chapter 4 – Guilty Conscience

* * *

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight. I am not Stephenie Meyer. I am just a poor college student who dreams of Jacob Black in her spare time.

* * *

We got back to my place and I handed Bella one of my bigger T-shirts. She headed back into the bathroom to take a shower and change. I walked into the living room and turned on the TV. Some senseless weatherman droned on and on about the sun we'd been getting lately and how it didn't even feel like Forks.

It certainly didn't feel like Forks. Or La Push. Or whatever you wanted to call it. Maybe the weather was reminiscent of my good mood lately, since I'd been bedding Bella. Or pathing. Whatever.

I pulled out some lunchmeat and cheese from the refrigerator and found some bread in the breadbox. Dad had gone grocery shopping. I'd wonder who'd taken him. I pulled a plate out of the cabinet and started making sandwiches.

"Um, Jake?" I heard Bella call from the bathroom.

"Yeah?" I called back.

"Can you come fix your shower?" she asked, peering from around the door. "I can't figure out how to get the hot water to come on.

I laughed to myself and walked back there. Bella came out into the hall, soaking wet and wrapped in a white fluffy towel. She looked miffed.

"Bella, you can't let the shower outsmart you," I teased, forcing myself to keep my eyes locked on her face. She shot me a dirty look. I walked into the tiny bathroom and turned the dial in the shower to the right spot. The water sprayed all over me, soaking me in warm water.

"Yup, definitely warm," I gurgled, spitting water out of my mouth.

A broad smile played about Bella's lips.

"I'll try not to let the shower outsmart me next time. I'll just keep what you just did in my thoughts and remember not to do that," she grinned.

"Yeah, that works," I said, heat rising into my cheeks.

I headed out of the bathroom and let her back into it. I headed into my dad's bathroom and hurried to take a shower. I didn't think he'd mind, considering the other bathroom was temporarily occupied.

I let the hot water wash over me, mulling thoughts over in my head. Jacob Black's head was not the best place to be in normal times. Now, it was downright treacherous. I sighed as I turned the water off and watched the muddy water go down the drain. I knew I'd always loved Bella. I didn't know what was playing through her head right now and I didn't think I could bear to guess. I knew that this was my very last chance to win her. _Win her_, I thought bitterly. _It's not a game._

I stepped out of the shower and wrapped a towel around my waist. I looked around for the sweatpants I'd been carrying around and cursed to myself as I realized I'd left them in Bella's bathroom.

I quickly cleaned up the bathroom and then headed into the hallway, toward my bedroom. Bella was standing in the hallway, pulling a towel away from her hair. Her wet hair fell around her shoulders and she looked up at me innocently. She was wearing my over-sized white T-shirt and that was it. No bra, no underwear, no socks… all of her clothes were in her hand. I stood in the hallway, shaking my head, trying to clear it of impure thoughts.

"I was going to ask you if you had any dirty clothes you wanted me to throw in with my things," she said, biting her bottom lip.

"Yeah," I said. "Let me get some stuff out of my bedroom. I'll meet you in the laundry room."

She nodded and I walked into my bedroom and pulled on one of my many pairs of sweatpants. I grabbed a few other pairs out of the laundry basket I used as a hamper and walked back into the infinitesimal laundry room. Bella stood leaning against the washing machine, watching it fill up.

I dropped my sweatpants into the cycle and she looked up at me curiously.

"What?" I asked her, baffled by the look on her face.

"No underwear?" she asked. "Those sweatpants are the ones you've worn for the last three days."

"It's just one more thing to carry around," I said, crossing my arms.

She laughed, shaking her head. "I didn't realize you didn't wear underwear, Jacob." She jumped onto the dryer and sat there, her elbows resting on her knees, her hands cradling her head.

"Well, you asked, sort of." I shook my head, smirking.

I heard the front door slam and two voices carry into the hallway.

"Oh, look, Jacob made sandwiches," Billy said, setting his keys down on the kitchen table.

"That was nice of him," Charlie said. "I'm surprised he didn't eat them all. You know how that boy eats."

"Well, he's had a growth spurt lately, you know. I figure that's got a lot to do with it," Billy reasoned.

Bella's eyes caught mine in horror. She looked down at her bare legs and crossed her arms over her chest.

"I usually don't forget things like this. I guess it's just part of getting old," Billy laughed. His voice was drawing closer.

Bella moaned in anxiety. I walked over to the laundry room door to lock it. Billy was faster. He opened the laundry room door and his jaw dropped as he took in Bella and I, standing there with wet hair, dressed in the bare necessities.

"What are you doing?" he mouthed.

"Do something!" I mouthed back.

"I know I left that tackle box back here somewhere," Billy called back to Charlie.

"I think I know where it is!" Charlie said, his voice suggesting recognition. "You won't be able to reach it."

I saw my expression of utmost anxiety reflected in Billy's eyes. He shrugged his shoulders helplessly.

Charlie pushed open the door.

He gaped at me and Bella. "Bella?" he said bewilderedly. "What are you…"

"Dad, it's not what it looks like," she said. "Me and Jake were just hanging out earlier and – "

"It looks like you were doing more than just hanging out," Charlie said, his eyes narrowed. "Bella, what are you thinking? You're married to Edward!"

"I know I'm married to Edward. Jacob just said I could take a shower and wash my clothes here… It's not like anything else happened!"

Through my horror and embarrassment, I noticed Charlie was taking Edward's side of things for once. I yearned for him to take my side again, just now. I couldn't explain it. It didn't help that I had visions of the past two days flooding my brain. If Edward were around, I wouldn't have been able to hide my thoughts in the slightest.

"You could have come back home to wash your clothes," Charlie grumbled.

"And what? Been buddy-buddy with Sue while you were out fishing with Billy?" Bella snapped.

"Bella…" Charlie said reproachfully. "We were going to tell you together."

"Yeah, well, I came over yesterday to wash clothes and there were flowers and a tablecloth on the table and a new shower curtain and her menopausal medicine stuff in the medicine cabinet! So excuse me if I needed to do laundry here instead."

Charlie just stared at Bella, a stunned expression on his face.

"Oh, and by the way, if I did want to sleep with Jacob, that's MY business. I don't need your permission to do anything!" she huffed.

"Jacob, can you hand me the tackle box?" Charlie said weakly. "We'll just be going out to the lake, then."

I grabbed the tackle box from above the washer and handed it to Charlie.

"You guys have fun at the lake," I said. "I'm going to run Bella home after we have lunch."

"You guys have fun," Billy said, looking over at Charlie and giving him an expression that from experience, I knew meant 'we'll-talk-about-this-when-we-get-out-to-the-car.'

After we heard the front door slam, Bella came over to me and hugged me, pressing her tear-stained cheek against my chest.

"Hey, it's going to be all right, okay?" I said reassuringly. "Your dad will forgive you. And you were right. It _is_ none of his business what you do. We're all adults now."

Bella hiccupped. "Adults? Jake, you're not even seventeen yet," she laughed.

"Well, physically, I'm twenty-five, remember?" I reminded her of our conversation nearly two years beforehand. I wiped away her tears with a brush of my hand.

She just shook her head and looked out the window above the dryer. I'd always wondered how even when she was upset, she managed to look absolutely beautiful.

"Did you really make sandwiches?" she asked, tearing her eyes away from Billy's azaleas.

"Yeah," I said. "Just ham and turkey sandwiches. There's not much else. I really need to go grocery shopping for Billy," I said.

"Yeah," she said. "Then the whole reservation would know that I took a shower at your place and my clothes were so dirty they needed to be washed in the washer."

"And that would only lead to questionable thoughts," I laughed, raising my eyebrows. "It'd be the scandal of the century."

Bella snorted.

"Oh baby, oh baby," she grinned.

"You know it," I teased.

The buzzer on the washer buzzed loudly, making us both jump. Bella pulled the clothes out and stuck them in the dryer and we both headed into the kitchen. I pulled out two more plates and stuck them on the kitchen table and then poured myself some water out of the pitcher in the refrigerator.

"What would you like to drink, my lady?" I asked Bella, looking into the fridge. "There's Coke, Pepsi, canned lemonade, canned iced tea…. Billy likes his tea unsweetened," I said, sticking my tongue out at her.

"You guys have _canned_ lemonade and iced tea?" she asked, frowning.

"The lemonade is for when Rachel comes back home with Paul," I said. "She likes lemonade, but never has time to make it. I don't like making it, and Billy has issues with making it. Probably has something to do with having to go to the sink to pour water and then finding an empty pitcher and then reaching the mix… So we just started buying canned lemonade and then they came out with canned iced tea and Billy has been in heaven ever since."

Bella just shook her head.

"I guess I'll have to see if that canned lemonade is better than the real thing," she said.

"Oh, it is!" I said saucily, shaking my head and placing one hand on my hip.

Bella just laughed, shaking her head. "Jacob Ephraim Black, if I ever catch you doing that again, I will never speak to you again."

"Sure you won't," I said, setting her lemonade in front of her.

I sat down at the table and took six of the sandwiches for myself, leaving Bella two. She gaped at me.

"What, you're not used to seeing me eat, are you?" I asked, remembering Bella had only seen me eat once before.

"What if I had wanted three or four?" she asked me, reaching toward my plate.

"What, do the vamps starve you?" I asked, eyeballing her. I moved my plate away from her protectively.

"No," Bella admitted. "But what if you had tired me out earlier?"

I rolled my eyes.

"Still," she said, shaking her head in disbelief. "SIX sandwiches? Save some bread for Billy!"

"I go grocery shopping. That's enough repayment," I said dismissively.

Bella just shook her head and went over to the refrigerator and opened it, looking into the compartment behind the door.

"Don't you guys have any mayonnaise?" she asked me, frowning.

"Nope," I said, shaking my head. "Neither I, nor Billy, can stand it. Come back when Rachel comes over with Paul and maybe we'll have some. She loves the stuff." I made gagging sounds to emphasize my point.

She sniffed and took her seat next to me and started eating.

"She eats!" I crowed, making her smile.

"Yes, I eat," she replied, cutting her sandwich in half.

"You mean the vampires haven't brought you back blood to drink?" I asked her.

She glared at me.

"No," she sniffed. "That won't be for nearly another year."

So she hadn't changed her mind. She still planned on being changed, on being made one of them. I sighed. I still had a lot of work to do, apparently.

"Have you thought of what will happen after the baby's born?" I asked her, not looking her directly in the eye.

"What do you mean?" she asked, frowning.

"Just… afterward. Would you and Edward let me be in the baby's life or would you rather the two of you raise it?" I was finally asking some of the questions that had been plaguing me for a while.

"Of course you're going to be allowed to be in the baby's life!" Bella nearly gagged on her turkey sandwich. "What did you think we were going to do? Take him and hide him away in some vampire's lair?" she asked incredulously.

"No," I said placidly. "I didn't know if you'd want the baby knowing I was his or her father. I figured it was bound to lead to certain… ah… questions, down the road."

"Questions that Edward and I will definitely answer," she said. "The baby will know that he was wanted more than anything and that's why this… arrangement… was necessary."

I nodded.

"What if the baby turns out to be like me?" I asked, worriedly. "What would happen if it turned into a werewolf when it got older? How would you and Edward handle that? Would you be prepared to?"

Bella sighed.

"It's crossed my mind, I won't lie," she said. "Rosalie went so far as to mention this morning. I haven't figured out what the exact solution would be. If it… pained the child to be around us full-time, I figured, or well, was going to ask you if it came down to that, whether you would mind the child staying with you or with someone else on the reservation."

"So if it became a problem, you'd sent the kid off on me?" I asked her. "Bella, in another twelve, thirteen years, I'm going to have a life. I might be married to someone else by that point. I could have imprinted or something." I searched her face to see if that bothered her. I could tell that it did. "You know I would do anything for you, and that's why I'm doing this now."

"I know it's unfair of me to even ask. I know that having children isn't part of the deal when you choose _that_ life. I just… I don't know what else to do, Jacob. Having Edward's baby could have killed me, yet I wanted that baby so badly… that's why I'm resorting to this. Do you think this is easy on me? Do you think this is something I want to have to do? Sleep with someone who isn't my husband in order to get pregnant with someone else's child? It's not what I want in the slightest. Yet, it's just how things are." She leaned back in her chair with her arms crossed against her chest.

"Bella, things would be so much easier if you were with me," I said, exasperatedly. "You could have children. More than just one! I could age with you. We could have a family, you wouldn't have to hide or go through some crazy, newborn stage. Bella, we could have a _life_ together!" I willed her to understand how much I wanted her, how much I needed her, and how badly I wanted us to have a life together.

"You don't think that's crossed my mind?" she asked me. "It has! More than once! I've never told Edward, but I've _dreamed_ about that life… the one I'm giving up! But in the end, it's not enough, Jacob. I hate saying that, but as much as I want it to be enough, something else is holding me to Edward. Something bigger than me. Something bigger than even you or him or any of this. I can't explain it. I won't leave him, Jacob. I can't."

"You know I was there when he wasn't!" I exclaimed. "I was there to hold you together when he left. I was – "

"I know perfectly well what you did when Edward left," she said quietly. "You were my personal sun, my replacement sun. I will forever be grateful to you for that. But I can't be with you, Jacob. Not when my very survival depends on him!"

"You've never tried to be without him," I said, shaking my head.

"What do you want me to do, Jacob?" Bella cried. "Do you want me to just have your baby, leave Edward, run to La Push and marry you? I can't do that!" She was crying now.

"You can't tell me the last two days haven't meant anything to you!" I yelled.

"They have!" she admitted. "Okay? They have! Being with you was like something out of someone else's life. But just because I'm in love with you doesn't mean I'm not in love with Edward anymore. I love him more than I love you, Jacob. He's my husband. At the end of the day, I go back to him. I spend my nights with him." She got up. "I can't do this anymore," she said calmly, wiping away her tears. She started walking toward the door.

"Where are you going?" I demanded.

"I'm going _home!_" she exclaimed.

"Let me drive you," I said, grabbing my keys. "You need to get your clothes. You can't go home like that."

"Fine," she said, hearing the buzzer on the dryer go off.

She headed into the laundry room and came back out with her clothes on. She stormed out of the house and over to the Rabbit. I locked the door and walked over to the Rabbit and unlocked my door. I reached over and lifted the unlock switch on her door. She opened the door, got in, and slammed it shut.

The entire ride back to the Cullens' hellhole was silent. I pulled into the driveway and she got out and slammed the door. She walked to the walkway, up the porch stairs, and into the house without a backwards glance. I pulled out of the driveway and headed home, close to tears, my heart heavy with emotion.

* * *

_So yeah, a kind of sad chapter. :(__ It gets better, though! :)_

_Please review! :)_

_Thanks for all of the reviews! My gears are definitely turning now! I don't have regular internet access, but I have the first... 13 or so chapters of this story already written. Haha... So when I get reviews, I will reward you with another chapter. Mean? Maybe... haha. :)_

_I'm really glad you guys like the story so much. I wasn't really sure if it was very good or not, but I haven't been able to stop writing in my spare time, so I figured I might as well post this one since it's around 35,000 words right now. LOL..._

Thanks for reading!

_xoxo_


	5. Two Weeks Later

Chapter 5 – Two Weeks Later

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Disclaimer: If I was Stephenie Meyer, this story would not be here. It would be on a bookshelf somewhere with an ISBM sticker on the back of it.

* * *

It was a whole two weeks before I heard from Bella again. Her eventual correspondence didn't even come from something personal, like a visit or a phone call, or a letter, or a message on the answer machine.

It came in the form of an angry phone call from Charlie Swan to Billy.

I wondered if Bella was the most fertile person on the planet. Apparently, it'd taken Edward once to impregnate her. I guess the same had stayed true for me.

I'd just come back from patrolling the perimeter with Seth and Leah. Leah had just spilled her guts on me, so my head was already spinning with female problems. Seth and Leah were having problems because Sue had moved out and was living with Charlie and so even though Leah was twenty-one, she was left raising her kid brother. I could see where that could be hard enough, not to mention the fact that the two of them were werewolves. The drama for Leah just kept piling on. I really did feel sorry for her.

At any rate, when I had come home at daybreak, Billy was sitting on the couch, the TV off, the lamp nearest him turned on, no other thing that could possibly use electricity around him. I headed into the kitchen and poured myself some water and came and sat down next to him.

"Are you alright, Dad?" I asked. "You seem kind of…" I couldn't put my finger on the expression on Billy's face. I'd never seen it before.

"Charlie just called me," he said. "Last night, after you had gone patrolling. Bella called him. Have you heard from her lately?" he asked me.

"It's been around two weeks, I guess. I think she's been kind of busy. We got into it last time she came over," I said shortly.

"Well, son, you might want to get out of it and stop arguing with her." I didn't know how Billy knew Bella and I were fighting… unless Charlie told him.

"Dad, I know you and Charlie are friends, but I don't think this is something you two should be getting involved in," I said, trying to be nice.

"Well, when my son impregnates my best friend's daughter, I think I have a right to get a little _involved_," Billy snapped. "Jacob, what were you thinking? She's _married _for God's sake. We all wanted you to end up with Bella in the end, but after she married the bloodsucker, you should have known it was time to back off."

"Does Charlie know the baby's mine?" I asked Billy, dazed.

"No," Billy said. "He just called me all happy-like and announced that he was going to be a grandpa… that Bella and Edward were having a baby. He didn't say that Bella and Jacob were having a baby. I doubt he knows how dangerous it would be for Bella to have Edward's spawn," he grimaced. "You had no idea?" he asked me.

"No," I said. "Bella never called, never showed up. I guess we're still not talking. There weren't any missed calls on the phone, were there?"

Billy shook his head. "I've been home since yesterday," he said. "If she would have called, I would have gotten the call. But, Jacob, you realize what the chances are of that child becoming a werewolf? Especially _living_ with bloodsuckers? Jacob, this isn't like you going to another tribe and knocking up some girl and then going and seeing your kid whenever you want. This is serious. If that child turns into a werewolf, he's going to have to _live here._ You're going to end up being a full-time dad, whether you're ready to or not. You need to fix things with Bella and you need to fix them now. Your kid's future depends on it. You're going to start having to be a dad right now, not waiting twelve or thirteen years to show up and say, 'Hey kid! Daddy's home!'"

I knew Billy was right, but I didn't know how to fix things with Bella.

"Any ideas?" I asked him.

He just shrugged his shoulders.

"That's on you," he said. "I can ask Charlie to have Bella call you, but that's all I can do. In the end, this is one pickle I can't help you with. This is something you need to do on your own."

I sighed. I figured a call to the Cullens' cove was more than necessary at this point. I walked into my room and phased and came back out, my shorts in my mouth.

Billy looked at me strangely as I headed out the door.

Once I got outside, I ran into the woods. I howled for Seth.

It took a bit of patient waiting, but eventually, he joined me.

_What's all this about?_ he asked, yawning. _I was just about to get some good sleep._

_I need you to come to the Cullens' with me, _I replied.

_Aw, man, Jake! Why right this second?_ he asked.

_If you come with me, I'll tell you_, I said, heading toward their lair.

_Fine. It better be important, though_, Seth complained.

_Important? Yeah, that's one thing you can call it,_ I replied.

It didn't take us long to reach the Cullens'. I had explained to Seth what Billy had told me, leaving out some of the more private details. We reached their manor and I found Bella standing outside on the porch.

"Let me guess," she said, stiffly. "When I called my dad and told him that Edward and I were expecting a baby, the first person he called was Billy. Billy, of course, saw right through the sham and called you. And you decided that you couldn't keep your mouth shut and had to tell all of your little doggie friends."

"No," I replied. "I told Seth because I didn't feel comfortable coming here with no one watching my back. Obviously, you have no plans of telling anyone the truth, let alone this child. However, as the child's biological father, I feel it is important to remind you of the ramifications of your decision. What's going to happen when this kid becomes a werewolf, Bella? What's going to happen when there's no one around to explain what's going on, when he can't figure out how to phase back? What's going to happen when you own child hates you for hiding the truth?" I taunted her.

"That's not going to happen," Bella said, one hand flying to her stomach protectively. "The baby could just as easily be a girl."

"Have you not met my sister?" Seth piped up. "She's a werewolf, too."

I could have kissed Seth for bringing that up at the right time.

Bella's eyes popped open in fear.

She turned as Edward came out the door.

"Mongrel, I'm telling you to leave, now," he growled.

"I'm not leaving my kid," I said fiercely. "You wouldn't do it either if you have a paternal _fossil_ in you," I growled.

"Well, right now, it's about another twenty-something weeks until 'your kid' can actually survive on his or her own," Bella sniffed. "So until 'your kid' gets here, you can let me and Edward do what we feel is necessary for him or her during the prenatal stage."

"The prenatal stage?" I spat. "What crock of bull is Dr. Fang feeding you? That's my kid and I'm not abandoning it."

"I didn't say you were," Bella said. "But right now, I don't think it's healthy for me to be around you, Jacob. You're stressing me out. I just found out that I'm pregnant and the last thing I need to do is argue with you."

In frustration, I heard my self shouting before I could control myself.

"You wouldn't have that child if it weren't for me! So when you're holding it in your arms, just remember that that's one thing I've given you that _he_ can't!"

Bella whirled around.

"How dare you?" she yelled. Edward placed his hands on her shoulders and she turned around and looked at him. He wrapped his arms around her belly protectively and held her close to him. The entire scene made me sick to my stomach.

"You might want to tell your dad the truth," I said. "Before someone else does. I mean, once the kid gets here and isn't snow white and perfect, he might suspect that something's happened and someone's _lied_ to him."

With that, I turned around and bolted for the tree line, phasing on the spot and destroying yet another pair of sweatpants. It's a good thing they weren't that expensive. I'd realized cheap sweatpants went a long way for their value with me.

_Jacob? _Seth seemed a little anxious, a little apprehensive. _Are you okay?_

_Not really, _I said truthfully.

_Well, um, congratulations. You're going to be a dad, right? _Seth seemed kind of cheerful.

_Maybe_, I said darkly. _If Bella comes to her senses._

* * *

When I got back home, I said goodbye to Seth and headed toward the house. I could see the game playing through the window and sincerely hoped that Billy had enough sense to keep Charlie away today. Charlie Swan and his euphoria over the news that he would become a grandfather for the first time was the last thing I needed.

I opened the door and saw Billy and Charlie cheer as someone ran across the 30-yard line. First down.

"Hey, Jake!" Charlie called. "Did you hear the news?"

"Yeah," I said. "Dad here told me. I can't wait." I remembered what Edward had said about fighting fair a long time ago. "I just got back from over there actually. We're trying to figure out what last name to give the baby."

Charlie's brows came together in a look of total bewilderment. Billy glared at me in disapproval.

"Come again?" Charlie asked.

"Well, the baby has to be mine. I mean, Edward's sterile. They wanted a baby, so Edward came to me and asked me if I could donate the missing ingredient."

Charlie's jaw popped open in shock.

"So technically," I continued, "Bella and Edward _are_ having a baby, since Bella's decided against letting me have anything to do with the kid."

"I thought you said you and Bella hadn't…" he trailed off.

"We didn't here in the house," I admitted. "But earlier that day, we did. And the day before.… Edward knew about it, so it's not like she was cheating on him or anything." I looked at Charlie a bit warily, not sure if he was going to fly off the handle at me for having inappropriate conduct with his married daughter.

"And you just went along with the whole plan?" Charlie asked incredulously.

"Well, I figured it'd give me a chance to get back in the door. I didn't necessarily have completely pure motives in the entire thing. But Edward's a bit… controlling, don't you think? If he gets his claws any further into her, you won't be seeing much of your daughter, Charlie," I said, giving him a sad look.

"So wait… Bella is pregnant with your baby, but it's on purpose and she's staying married to Edward and he knows about all of this, yet he's okay with it?" Charlie asked, shaking his head like he'd heard something crazy.

"Yep," I said, grabbing a thing of popcorn and putting it into the microwave. "Popcorn anyone?" I asked.

"Hell," Charlie said, shaking his head. "Jacob, I give you full permission under the law to do whatever comes to mind in order to get her away from him. Especially since that's your baby. I've got a pistol back home you can use." I wasn't sure if he was kidding or not.

"I don't think beating the crap out of her husband is going to make her want to leave him, Charlie," Billy said.

"So, both of us are going to be grandparents," Charlie said, shaking his head in awe.

"Yep," Billy said. "I didn't think of that. Hey, Jake, bring me some of that popcorn if you don't mind."

"Sure thing, Dad," I said, grinning.

* * *

_I know this one is a little shorter the last few have been, but I figured this was a good stopping point. I really liked the interaction between Jacob and Billy and Charlie at the end. :) I know it's been a while since I've updated. I had to update my anti-virus here at the library before I posted the next chapter. I couldn't get online at school. :( So hopefully I can get that taken care of today and the next few chapters should come quicker. :)_

_Please review!! If I get a few, I'll have the next chapter up pronto… it's already written! ;)_

_Thanks for reading!  
xoxo_


	6. A Little Too Much Morning Sickness

Chapter 6 – A Little Too Much Morning Sickness

* * *

Disclaimer: If you open up _Twilight, New Moon, Eclipse, _or _Breaking Dawn_, and flip to the inside of the back cover, you will not see my picture. Also, you will never find a picture of Jacob Black and I together. :(

* * *

It wasn't until I hit about eight weeks pregnant that I really started getting morning sickness. Against all odds. Carlisle had said the likelihood that I was going to get it decreased if I hadn't had it at all by seven weeks. I had really been looking forward to the glorious second trimester where I was supposed to feel absolutely amazing.

I really don't know why they call it "morning" sickness. It felt more like all day long and all night long, drawn out, absolutely gross, disgusting, HORRIBLE sickness. I could tell Edward felt absolutely awful for me, but I couldn't just stay away from him until it was over. I didn't know how long that would be.

Rosalie had become slightly nicer to me over the last few weeks. I guess she had felt bad for the comment she had made on the landing while Edward and Emmett were fighting downstairs. She had taken to making me iced tea with ginger which actually did make me feel a bit better. I didn't ask her where she had learned that. However, Edward did tell me that Rosalie had taken my pregnancy as an opportunity to learn all about pregnancy and that she'd been studying that while Alice was teaching herself Bosnian sign language and Esme was teaching herself Simlish so she could figure out what her characters on the Sims were saying. I'd often asked Edward whether I'd have as much time as they did to learn every single language known to mankind. He said I would and that if I wanted, I could go ahead and join them now and pick a subject.

I told him I'd think about it.

I still hadn't talked to Jacob. I hadn't forgiven him for his inexcusable behavior after he had found out I was pregnant. Coming up here with Seth like that was just ridiculous. I don't know what he was thinking. Maybe he was insane. That's one thing I hadn't ruled out because it did sort of make sense. I didn't know why he had entertained the idea that I was going to leave Edward for him if I got pregnant with his baby.

It was strange. The pregnancy had actually had a positive impact on my relationship with Edward and it had only just begun. Of course, Edward felt the need to treat me as if I was made of glass… I guess he felt like he needed to do that because that was what they did in the early twentieth century or something. I really didn't know.

Charlie paid us an unexpected visit the day I turned nine weeks. Sue was with him. Alice answered the door and ushered them into the living room. I came into the living room and greeted them.

The first thing I noticed was Sue's strong perfume. It smelled musky, not like the woods' natural scent, but some musky scent mixed with a weird floral scent. Edward sat next to me and I tried to concentrate on his _good_ smell and less on the smell radiating from Sue that made me want to vomit.

"It's nice to see you, Dad," I said, giving him a hug. "It's been a while!"

"It has," Charlie said, nodding. "How have you two been?" he asked.

"We've been alright," Edward said, looking at me.

"I asked Bella," Dad said, glaring at Edward. Sue cleared her throat and elbowed Charlie.

"I'm sorry," she said. "Charlie wasn't trying to be so… _inhospitable_."

"But that's Dad," I said, shrugging.

"You two look happy," Sue said, smiling. "I hope everything's going well with the baby."

"Everything's going just fine," I said graciously, looking at Edward. "We can't wait for him or her to get here."

"Have you talked to Jacob lately?" Charlie asked, folding his arms.

"No," I said, bewildered. "I haven't talked to Jacob lately. We aren't talking right now."

"So I've heard," Charlie said, glaring at Edward once more. I was confused. What did Charlie know and what wasn't he telling me?

"I talked to Jacob a couple of weeks ago," Charlie said, "When I went to Billy's a while back. Seems that Jacob thinks that baby is his."

"That's impossible," I said, folding my hands over my belly protectively.

"He said Edward's sterile," Charlie retorted.

Edward cleared his throat. "Excuse me?"

I was mortified.

"There is nothing _wrong_ with Edward at all," I said, blushing. "Why are we even talking about this?"

"Well, would you like to mention the time I walked into Billy's laundry room to grab his tackle box and saw you soaking wet, wearing nothing but Jacob's T-shirt? Seems to me that there would be at least one instance that this baby could have been conceived with someone else. I know the times sure fit."

"Dad, I did not cheat on my husband," I said flatly.

"But that doesn't mean Edward didn't know about it," Dad said, glaring at me. "I'm sick of being lied to, Bella. And you can't keep Jacob away forever if that is, in fact, his baby."

"There are gaping holes in your story, young lady," Sue added. "I don't see Jacob lying about the paternity of a baby, especially saying that it's his if there's no way it could be."

I sighed. "Have you ever thought that maybe I don't want to share every detail about my marriage with you?" I asked Charlie. "I don't tell you whom you can and cannot date and I've never said one bad word about Sue. I've never insinuated that you haven't been faithful to her. And I've never said one scandalous or libelous word to either of you about the other. I never got involved in your marriage with Mom or your relationship with her since. I never pushed for the two of you to get together or for you to stay apart. All I'm asking for is the same courtesy," I finished.

"I'm not asking for every detail," Charlie said. "However, Jacob is convinced – "

"Dad, I could really care less about Jacob right now. Is that the only reason you came over here? To talk to me about what Jacob wants?"

"No," Charlie said, grudgingly. "Although that was part of it."

"Why don't you and Sue stay for dinner?" I asked him. "Esme is a wonderful cook."

"I wouldn't want to impose," Charlie said, looking around.

"Nonsense," Carlisle said, coming down the stairwell. "It wouldn't be imposing at all. It's not every night I get to have the police chief in my house. Or the father of my daughter-in-law. Or her step-mother."

"Sue's not my step-mother," I interjected.

"Not yet," Charlie said.

"You're not getting married?" I gasped.

"We're… discussing it," Charlie said shortly. "I'm not going to inject my beliefs about the sanctity of marriage into your business and I'd appreciate it if you did the same."

I just gaped at him.

"You know, Esme's making dinner. I'm going to go vomit now," I said, getting up.

I ran into the closest bathroom and hung my head over the toilet, clutching the bowl. I wanted to damn Esme to the deepest pit of hell for making omelets that morning. The peppers were good on the way down, not so good on the way back up. I heard Edward excuse himself from the sitting room and he came to join me.

"How awful do I look right now?" I asked him.

"You still look beautiful, even with vomit chunks flying out of your mouth," he promised, pulling my hair out of my face and pinning it behind me, out of the way.

"Thank you," I moaned, before I regurgitated again.

Esme went all out for dinner. I was impressed. She made chicken cordon bleu and a fresh salad she had made with fresh vegetables. She even made chicken noodle soup, hoping to sooth my stomach. Rosalie had made me a new pitcher of iced tea with ginger.

"So how are things in Forks?" Alice asked Charlie, smiling appreciatively at him.

"Things are good. Mike Newton," he said, nodding at me, "is getting married next summer."

"He asked Jessica to marry him?" I asked, aghast.

"Well, at least now you're not the only person to get married straight out of high school," Edward teased me.

"I don't know Jessica that well, but she seems like a nice enough girl," Charlie said.

"I'm just glad he's finally given up the notion that I'm going to go out with him," I muttered.

"You and me both," Edward said. I noticed this time, he wasn't teasing.

"So have you guys done any baby shopping?" Sue asked.

"I'm actually letting Alice here decorate the nursery," I said. "I'm no good at decorating, but Alice is amazing."

Alice grinned. "I try. It's a hobby of mine," she said.

"Have you picked out a theme yet?" Sue asked her.

"I'm still deciding," Alice said. "I've gone with a sort of custardy yellow for the walls."

"I think teddy bears are darling for a unisex nursery," Sue said. "That was my favorite part before Leah and Seth were born. Their nurseries were simply beautiful. I remember having the hardest time choosing between watermelons and daisies for Leah. I ended up compromising with a nice watermelon-colored pink for the fabric and light green walls with lots of daisies."

"That sounds very pretty," Alice said, sincerely.

I was getting really sick of all of the nursery talk.

"Alice, you go on much more and you'll have already told me all of your plans for the nursery! It's supposed to be a surprise!" I chided her.

Alice smiled serenely.

"Have you thought of names?" Charlie asked.

I was intrigued that Charlie would bring up something having to do with the baby. I really thought he was against everything to do with the entire situation.

"For a girl, I really like Norah," I said.

"That was Jacob's grandmother's name," Charlie said, frowning.

"Yes," I said, figuring there was no point of lying. "But I still really like it. I told Alice I'd give the baby her name as a middle name if it was a girl. So, I really like Norah Alice."

"And for a boy?" Charlie pressed.

"I'm not really sure," I said. "Edward and I have played around with a few things."

Charlie nodded.

"Jackson Edward was at the top of our list, but it keeps changing," Edward said.

"What about last names?" Charlie asked.

"The baby's last name is going to be Cullen, of course," Rosalie said from across the table. "Edward and Bella are married. Why wouldn't the baby have their last name?"

I could have kissed Rosalie right then.

"I see," Charlie said, stiffly.

I knew what Charlie was doing and in a way, I could agree with him if I let myself. I knew Charlie was taking up for Jacob because Jacob was the one he'd wanted me with all along, probably even before I'd set foot in Forks. Maybe while I was still in Forks, back when him and my mom were still together… if Jacob was even born then. I think I was two when Renée left and took me with her.

But the fact remained that Jacob had really hurt me. And I knew that if I let myself over-think things, that'd I'd really be in trouble. I knew Edward loved me and I knew I loved him. I knew that we were married and I knew that we were going to raise this child together. However, I knew that part of me loved Jacob, but I didn't know how strong that part was. The only thing I could do was keep those feelings at bay. And secretly, I didn't know if I would be able to do that or for how long.

Charlie and Sue left right after dinner. I was glad to see the back of them. As much as I loved my dad, he wasn't making things very easy on me. I helped Esme clean up after dinner and then I found Edward playing piano… a new piece I hadn't heard before.

"What are you playing?" I asked him, placing my hands on his shoulders.

"I figured that since you had a lullaby, the baby needed one, too," he said, concentrating.

"Really, now," I said, coming over to sit next to him on the piano bench.

"Rosalie told me that she learned that the baby can hear in the womb," he said.

"Yes, that's true, but the baby doesn't even have ears yet," I said. "It will be a while before he can hear what we're all saying or what his lullaby sounds like."

Edward grinned. "I'm starting it now, so I can perfect it before he _can_ hear it."

"You think it's a boy?" I asked him, leaning into his solid arm.

"I'm only saying that because you've been referring to him as a boy since we found out you were pregnant," he said.

"You're not upset that I'm pregnant with Jacob's baby, are you?" I asked him.

"No," he said immediately. "You wanted a child and I couldn't give you one. I'm glad Jacob was there to fill the… uh, need. And I can't wait to hold our child in my arms. I just think there are a few things that need to be straightened out first."

"Such as?" I asked him.

"I think you need to talk to Jacob," Edward said, ceasing his playing to look at me. "Like it or not, Jacob is going to need to be part of this child's life. Especially if the baby is a boy. The chances of him becoming like Jacob are too great. I think you and Jacob need to decide what Jacob's role is going to be in this child's life. And I think you need to figure out who is going to be this child's father… if it's going to be me or if it's going to be Jacob."

I looked at Edward strangely. "What do you mean?"

"I don't think Jacob is going to be too happy if this child grows up calling me 'Daddy' when he's the biological father. I don't think he's going to be happy watching his child grow up from a distance, either. That's just not how things are done in the Quileute culture. I know Billy isn't sure if he has another son and I know Jacob doesn't want his child to grow up thinking someone else is his father and then getting older and realizing that part of his life is a lie," Edward said seriously. "I'm just saying that this is something that you need to think about… something that can't just be taken lightly."

I nodded.

"You're right," I agreed. "I need to talk to Jacob. We'll get this straightened out," I said.

Edward just nodded and continued his piano playing.

"I love you," I told him, resting one hand on his arm.

"I know," Edward said. "I love you, too," he said, wrapping one arm around me.

* * *

_Hope you guys liked this chapter! This one was mostly a filler chapter to get things set up for the next one. Please review! I like to know if I'm doing a good job and if there's anything you'd like to see in the story._

_Thanks for reading!_

_xoxo_


	7. A Partial Reconciliation

Chapter 7 -- A Partial Reconciliation

* * *

Disclaimer: If you think Stephenie Meyer wrote this, you should probably get your eyes checked.

* * *

  
A few weeks passed. I hadn't heard much from Bella in nearly three months and I was getting rather nervous. I figured the best thing I could do was stay away until she was out of the "danger zone" and the likelihood of her miscarrying had dramatically decreased. Charlie continued to give me updates on the baby under Bella's nose and for that, I was extremely grateful.

It was getting hard for me to keep my min dcompletely closed off while I was phased. As much as I tried focusing on the Quileute Anthem while we were patrolling, I couldn't keep my thoughts away from Bella and the baby for long.

_Are you nervous? _Leah asked me suddenly.

_About what? _I asked, tearing my thoughts away from a scene where Bella and I were quite alone, my hands cradling her round belly.

_You know what I'm talking about. You've been trying to hide it, but you're not succeeding well, _she said, looking at me.

I decided that there was no point in lying or pretending Bella wasn't really pregnant and that the scene was really just something out of my imagination.

_Yeah, I'm nervous,_ I admitted. _She won'teven talk to me and I don't know what I'm going to do about the baby._

_What if it's one of us? _Leah asked. _Surely that's crossed your mind._

_Of course it has. I can't just abandon it. Bella's convinced herself that it's a girl and that it won't become a werewolf because of that._

Leah snorted. _She must be fooling herself then. Has she not me _me?

_I guess she's blocking that out. Seth remeinded her of that fact, _I said, my thoughts lingering on the last conversation I'd had with Bella.

Leah's thoughts were full of surprise and a little pride for her younger brother. _Wow, _she replied, stunned. _That's what you have to put up with? No offense, but I think Bella's being a bitch. She needs to calm down a bit and stop being so selfish._

_Right now, I agree with you, _I sighed as the sun rose up over the mountains, showing us in the dawn's early light.

We headed back toward the reservation.

_Things will work out, _Leah said. _I know they will._

_I hope you're right_, I replied.

_I wish there was more I could do for you, _Leah sighed. _You've done so much for me lately._

_Right, _I smirked. _Let's not get all mushy now. Race you back to the rez!_

With that, we took off running back to the reservation. Leah's thoughts were filled with something I hadn't heard before. I couldn't figure out exactly what it was.

* * *

When I got back home, Bella was sitting on my front steps. I stepped back in surprise, not expecting to see her.

"What are you doing here?" I asked her, frowning.

She jumped and turned around to face me. "I think we need to talk," she said in a small voice. "Do you have any spare time?"

"How did you get here?" I asked her, crossing my arms. I didn't see her Mercedes anywhere. I figured her darling _Eddie _would have been watching her like a hawk.

"Seth spent the night at Sue and Charlie's and I went over there last night to have dinner. Seth offered to bring me to the reservation , so I called Edward and told him I was spending the night at Charlie's."

"He actually agreed?" I asked in surprise.

"Yes," Bella said, looking down at her feet. "He's actually the one who said that I needed to talk to you."

I frowned in confusion. Why was the bloodsucker taking my side for once?

"I don't think I've been very fair to you, Jacob," she said, sighing. "I know you want to be with me, but you and I know that's not possible. I'm married to Edward and I'm going to stay married to Edward. But I want you to be a part of this baby's life. This baby is going to need you. I don't know if I feel comfortable with the baby calling you 'Daddy' or not, because Edward is going to be married to me, living with us, filling the roles a 'daddy' would fill. But I don't think 'Uncle Jake' would fly with you either. Quite frankly, Charlie would be pissed if the baby called you 'Uncle Jake.'"

I sighed, fighting the urge to punch something.

"No, Bella. 'Uncle Jake' is _not _going to fly with me. Edward is not the baby's biological father!" I exclaimed. "Would you like it if I got married and had the baby call my wife or imprint or whatever 'Mommy'? I don't think that would fly with you, either. Just because you're the one giving birth to the baby doesn't mean you're the one that gets to have all of the rights in deciding what's going to happen with the baby. I get some input too. So how about this? How about we compromise? I give you two instance I can live with and you pick the one you can live with."

Bella frowned.

"It depends on what the instances are," she said, drawing her knees up and wrapping her arms around them.

I took a deep breath before continuing. "Either the baby lives with you and calls me 'Daddy' and Edward picks some other form of endearment or the baby comes and lives here and calls you and no one else 'Mommy' and I can teach him or her everything there is to know about being a werewolf if it comes down to that."

Bella looked at me in shock.

"You actually think I'd let the baby live with you full-time with me coming here to _visit _like some stranger?" she gasped.

"That's what you're asking me to do!" I exclaimed.

Bella was silent.

"You're right," she said, sighing. She thought for a second, looking off toward the mountains. "How about this? We share custody. The baby stays with me every other week. You're the daddy and I'm the mommy. Edward goes by some other _term of endearment_ and Leah does the same."

"Leah?" I asked blankly.

"You can't tell me that there's nothing going on between you and Leah," Bella said, crossing her arms.

"There _isn't _anything going on between me and Leah. She's my beta. That's it," I said, laughing. Was Bella jealous or what?

Bella nodded. "Sure," she said dismissively.

"There's not!" I insisted. "I'm in love with you and I've always been in love with you. This baby wouldn't even exist if I hadn't agreed to this... monstrosity of a plan."

Bella nodded. "Yep."

Frustration boiled inside of me. "I don't love Leah. I never have. I don't know what your problem is or why you keep shoving Leah on me. Maybe it's because you think that if I'm side-tracked with Leah I won't love you anymore!"

I heard a rustling in the trees and a small gray wolf darted out of the trees, running west... toward the Clearwaters' renovated ranch.

"You knew she was listening," I said, bitterly.

"I had no idea," Bella said, looking genuinely shocked. "I guess I was right. She does care about you."

"That's ridiculous, Bella. Stop using that as an excuse! Right around three months ago, you held me and we made love. That wasn't just crude sex, Bella! You know it! You're just scared. scared to leave Edward, scared to leave behind the path you've told yourself you've wanted for the past two years!"

"How come every time I talk to you, you always shove yourself on me?" Bella asked calmly.

"Because you don't understand!" I exclaimed. "You're choosing wrong!"

"I'm not," Bella said. "There's no right or wrong when you're in love with someone. You just do what feels right. I'm in love with Edward, Jacob. You need to start accepting that now."

"I think you need to accept the fact that you're in love with me and that you love me just as much as you do Edward... maybe even more," I replied. "You need to accept the fact that you're carrying my child and that that binds us in a way that is stronger than any other commitment out there. I'm in love with you, Bella. I love you. And that's not going to change."

"I'm going home," Bella said abruptly. "Seth!" she called.

Seth trotted over in wolf form. Slowly, I put two and two together.

_Seth_ had phased into wolf form when I had phased into human form. _Seth _had known Leah had had feelings for me. _Seth _had told Leah to wait by my house patiently before I had gotten there, telling her I'd be side-tracked by Bella and too distracted to pay attention. _Seth _hadn't wanted Leah to have feelings for me, knowing that things were complicated enough because Bella was pregnant with my child. _Seth _was only trying to protect his sister's heart in the long run, by breaking it for her now. Seth was only a kid. He didn't understand that an unrequited love could break someone.

"Seth, we need to talk," I told him. I gave him an Alpha command. "Take Bella home and then come back here."

Seth nodded once. Bella climbed onto his back and the two were gone in a flash.

I headed inside, my head full of thoughts I _really_ didn't want floating around.

* * *

Seth came back about an hour later. I didn't ask what had taken him so long. I wasn't sure I wanted to know, in case it had anything to do with vampires.

He knocked at the door and I let him in, sighing in disapproval. I walked over to the kitchen table and sat down.

"What?" he asked, taking a seat across from me.

"I think you know," I said. "You and Leah were both phased at the same time. You were in close enough proximity to side-track her, once Bella and I's conversation turned to discuss her. I had no idea Leah had feelings for me, Seth. Nor did I realize she was sitting right behind the house. You know, Seth! You knew and you deliberately let her get hurt!"

"You sound like you care a little more than you're letting on," Seth said, crossing his arms and frowning.

I groaned.

"Leah is my beta. Our pack is so small, Seth. You know we can't afford to let emotions run wild. Not only that, but she's your _sister_. You're supposed to watch out for her, not deliberately hurt her."

"You know Leah won't let someone else watch out for her," Seth quipped. "Leah's always taken care of herself. She shouldn't have been eavesdropping in the first place."

I sighed, looking down at the table, trying to reason things out in my head.

"Alright, Seth. I don't care if she was eavesdropping or you side-tracked her so she would overhear our conversation or what. I don't know what Leah's feelings are... how strong they are or anything else. But I think you have an idea. You know how hurt Leah was when Sam ended things with her. You were there when Leah was making things hard on the whole pack because we could all see her thoughts and emotions. I really don't want that getting... _shoved_ on a pack as small as ours. Leah is a very good friend of mine. You know what. We've gotten close during those nighttime patrols of the perimeter -- "

"I'll say," Seth interjected.

"It's not like that!" I insisted. "Leah and I are friends. Good friends. I didn't know she had _feelings _for me. And even if I had known, it wouldn't have changed anything. I'm in love with Bella, Seth. I'm having a baby with Bella. Not Leah."

"Have you ever considered the possibility that Leah might be jealous of Bella?" Seth asked me suddenly.

"Is she?" I asked, frowning.

"I don't know," Seth admitted. "But it would seem like a pretty good reason for how she's been acting lately. Every time she's seen you think of Bella, she's felt... uncomfortable, I guess. Hostile. I can't really put a label on it. I don't think you've noticed because you've been a bit... preoccupied."

I groaned.

"How come things can't be simple?" I asked Seth. "How come Bella can't leave the bloodsucker and Leah fall for somebody _else?_"

"Who else is there that hasn't imprinted?" Seth asked pointedly. He started ticking the tribe's imprints off on his hand. "Quil and Claire, Paul and Rachel, Jared and Kim, Sam and Emily.... That just leaves you, me, and Embry. And Collin and Brady. But they're not even fourteen. And considering Leah's my sister and Embry's even younger than you, then maybe it's not too hard to see why Leah's infatuated with you."

I had to admit, Seth had a point.

"But why not someone from Forks? Someone who's not Quileute?" I asked.

"Leah's a werewofl. Come on. Do you really think that's going to happen? Who does she know outside of the reservation?"

I was caught on that one. I didn't know.

"I don't know who Leah knows or doesn't know," I snapped.

"I'm just trying to get you to see things from her perspective," he said.

"So are you on my side or her side?" I asked. "I can't read _your_ perspective."

Seth just shook his head. "I don't know _what_ my perspective is right now," he said. "I'm just telling you how I'm seeing things."

* * *

_Sooo... I just had to re-type this entire chapter from my laptop to this desktop. :) But I figured you guys deserved it. And thanks to xxAugustaxx for being my 100th reviewer. You guys are too good to me. :) Apparently, there were a lot of errors in it, so I just now went back and fixed it the mistakes that were in it. So if you're getting an email in your inbox, then that's because I just fixed the errors. In better news, I'm about to type up the next chapter from my laptop, since I still haven't gotten my internet connection for my laptop fixed. So yeah._

_Hope you guys enjoyed the chapter! Please review!_

_Thanks for reading!  
xoxo_


	8. Awkward Moments

Chapter 8 -- Awkward Moments

* * *

Disclaimer: If I owned the Twilight Saga, I would have gotten to meet Taylor Lautner in person. And maybe he would have fallen in love with me. Instead, I just settled on naming my dog after him.

* * *

Once I hit four months, my morning sickness magically disappeared. I was in heaven. I was finally able to get up and go from room to room without having to take a paper bag with me. Of course, there was no one who fully appreciated this more than Alice did. Her nursery project was in full swing and she spent most of her time between reading Bosnian sign language books and practicing her cross-stitch art. She would never let me see her finished pieces, though. This only irritated me slightly, as I had a lot of things on my mind other than cross stitching.

Edward and I still hadn't figured out what we were going to name the baby if it was a boy. Edward figured we could just wait until my ultrasound and see if we needed to worry about it then. However, I had this strange desire for the baby to be a boy. I didn't know why... it wasn't a rational desire. A rational desire would have been to hope that the baby was a girl so I didn't have to worry about the werewolf stuff. Then again, what was rational about Bella Cullen? I couldn't answer that question at all.

Rosalie and I had become good almost-friends over the past few months. She was almost nice to be around. She held my hand throughout my morning sickness days... when Edward and the others were busy hunting. I could go to her any time I had a question and she almost always knew the answer. On the rare occasion that she didn't know the answer, she'd go out of her way to answer it. I often wondered if this was merely because she couldn't have children of her own.

My body was slowly changing. I now had a slight bump sticking out between my hips. Edward teased me and said it slightly resembled a beer belly. His teasing was good-natured, but Esme and Rosalie still got onto him for it.

The one person I missed most, however, was Jacob. I'd only seen him twice since I'd found out that I was pregnant. I missed all the times we'd had together before all of this had happened.... before I'd married Edward, before I'd lost EJ, before everything had gotten so complicated and out of hand. I never complained about it though. I didn't want Edward to know I was upset. Instead, I tried to make up for Jacob's absence by being around Edward all of the time, holding his hand, being as close to him as I possibly could.

I often wondered if Edward noticed that I was acting differently than normal. I didn't think it was too noticeable, since it closely resembled how I was when Edward and I had first started dating. I was clingy. I was afraid he was going to leave me. And although I knew intellectually that he wasn't going to leave me, my heart still ached because I knew it wasn't Edward that I'd wanted at all. It was Jacob. And I wasn't being fair to Edward at all. But I couldn't live without him and both he and I knew it.

I felt like a horrible person.

I felt lonely. I felt like I needed Edward to need me. I wondered if he even wanted me anymore. I felt awful because I was pregnant with Jacob's child and I was unsure of the role that Edward was going to play in its life. I had told Edward what Jacob and I had decided and he seemed okay with it. We had decided that the baby would call Edward "Pa." It seemed fitting with Edward's old-fashionedness. I was okay with it. After all, Edward had called his own parents "Pa" and "Ma." When he admitted this to me, I couldn't help but laugh. I couldn't imagine Edward as a little boy with bright green eyes in his Ma's arms while he Pa came in the door from work... it just couldn't fit into my head.

* * *

Edward and I were in Carlisle's office. He checked the baby's heartbeat. I smiled as Edward's face brightened upon hearing the sound of the baby's healthy heartbeat filling the room.

"Well, this little one is certainly healthy," Carlisle announced, smiling. Edward held my hand as Carlisle continued to prod and poke at my belly.

"Your fundus is right where it should be for sixteen weeks, too. I see absolutely nothing to worry about," Carlisle said, grinning at the two of us.

"That's great news!" Edward said, smiling at me.

"It is," Carlisle agreed. "However, let's not make too much of a big deal about it. I think Alice is planning a party after your next check-up. She wants to throw a party to celebrate finding out the sex of the baby."

Edward rolled his eyes.

"Does she need to throw a party for everything?" he asked.

"It's Alice," I reminded him. "She gets a little over-excited about everything. And she's excited about becoming an aunt on top of it all."

"We should go find her niece in Biloxi," Edward said, looking over at Carlisle. "She's technically an aunt, even if she's never met her biological niece."

Yeah, I'm sure that would go over well," I said, rolling my eyes. "A pint-sized, not even five-foot-tall girl, appearing to be around twenty years old, runs up to an old woman in her eighties and announces that she's the old woman's aunt. She might just give her a heart attack. And then she would rush her to Carlisle, who's had a medical degree for nearly four hundred years. I'm sure that would go just swimmingly."

Carlisle laughed. "I think that letting her throw a party is a much better idea... saves us from all of that drama, at least."

"What drama?" Alice asked, poking her head into the office. "How's my niece?"

"It's a girl?" I asked her.

"No," Alice said immediately.

"So it's a boy? Come on! I don't even know what to name a boy!" I whined.

"I didn't say that either," Alice said, folding her arms. "Were you talking about me?"

"Does she know the sex of the baby?" I asked Edward.

"I don't know," Edward said, looking rather frustrated. "She's translating the Battle Hymn of the Republic into Arabic."

Carlisle laughed.

"Well, it looks like you two will just have to wait two more weeks to find out what this little one is," he said, gesturing to the small bump that was my baby belly.

* * *

Later that afternoon, I decided that I would go and visit Charlie and Sue. It'd been a few weeks since I'd seen them. Edward drove me over there while he went hutning and promised me that he'd be back to pick me up later that evening.

"Dad?" I called.

"Bells?" Charlie asked, coming out from the kitchen.

"That'd be me," I said dryly. I took off my coat and hung it up on the coat rack by the door.

"What a pleasant surprise!" Sue exclaimed, walking in from the bathroom.

"I actually wanted to talk to you," Charlie said gruffly. "I'm sorry for the way I treated you when we came over last time. I shouldn't have insinuated that the baby wasn't Edward's."

I took a deep breath.

"Dad, you were right," I said, walking into the living room and taking a seat on the couch. "The baby _is_ Jacob's. I shouldn't have gone off on you. It's just that it's a sensitive situation right now and Edward and I are married..."

"But you didn't cheat on Edward," Charlie said. It was a statement and not a question. I wondered if Jacob had really told Charlie the truth before I had the chance to. All signs were pointing that he had. I sighed.

"No, I didn't," I replied.

Charlie nodded.

"So is Jacob going to be providing for this baby?" he asked. "Or is Edward planning on adopting him?"

"We haven't decided that. And I didn't think the money situation was up for debate. Edward and the Cullens have plenty of money. Money isn't an issue when it comes to raising this baby. We are financially secure," I said, crossing my arms.

"I'm not trying to question your decision making," Charlie said. "I know you're smart enough to figure things out. I just think that Jacob should be doing something to provide for his child unless he plans on giving him up."

"You know just as well as I do that Jacob's not going to do that," I said, shaking my head. "Jacob's been adamant about being a part of his child's life. A couple of weeks ago, we decided that we were going to share custody of the baby."

Charlie's eyes widened.

"Bella, I'm not going to ask why you decided to have Jacob's kid or why you were even sleeping with Jacob in the first place if Edward's really not sterile. The situation is crazy enough. Neither of you obviously through the situation or the possible repercussions through, either. But you need to start thinking about what's best for this baby, Bells, not what's most convenient for you and Edward. This baby is depending on you to provide for him."

"Dad, will you stop referring to the baby as a boy?" I asked, trying to change the subject.

"Fine. I just think I'm getting a grandson," Charlie said, sitting down next to me. He paused for a second before continuing, this time with a grave look on his face. "Bella, you know I love you. I'm just worried that you might not be making the right decision because you want to have your life with Edward and you don't want Jacob to interfere."

"Dad, that's not -- "

"Bella, that's his baby," Charlie said, pointing to my stomach. "He's what? Seventeen? You and I both know he's not ready to take on this responsibility... my God, _you're_ not even ready to take on this responsibility."

"Dad, I _am_ married," I said, sighing.

"Just because you're married doesn't mean you'r eready to take on the responsibility of another life. You just turned nineteen years old!"

"Dad, are you really just going to sit here and lecture me?" I asked, sighing once more. "I realize that Jacob and I made a mistake in deciding to sleep together. It wasn't the best decision in the world. But now this baby is coming whether anyone's ready for it or not. If I'm not ready right now or Jacob's not ready right now, it's our responsibility to _be _ready before the baby gets here. I know what I'm doign. Jacob and I are going to work things out. I promise."

It was Charlie's turn to sigh.

"I really hope you two get things figured out sooner rather than later," he said.

"Charlie, Bella?" Sue called from the kitchen. "I'm making pumpkin pie. Do you want any?"

Charlie smiled at me. "Now that sounds good," he said, winking.

* * *

That night, Edward and I were relaxing on the large golden-framed bed in his room. It was just past midnight. I knew Alice was still at work on one of her surprises for me and Jasper was in his room, studying constellations. Esme was sitting by the fireplace in the sitting room with Carlisle. Rosalie and Emmett were outside, roasting marshmallows. It was a rather relaxing night. I cuddled closer to Edward.

"Are you cold?" he asked, drawing the blankets around me.

"No," I said, letting one hand drape closer to my belly hopefully. "Just thinking."

"About?" he asked, frowning.

"When I'll be able to feel the baby kick," I said honestly. "Among other things."

"Rose said it should be any time now," Edward reminded me.

"I know," I replied.

I heard a door close off in the distance.

"Emmett and Rosalie must be finished with their marshmallow roasting," Edward said, kissing the top of my head.

I nodded, yawning.

"You're tired," Edward said. "You need to get your rest."

"No I'm not," I said, sitting up. I crawled across him, straddling him. I leaned in and kissed his lips softly.

"What are you doing?" he asked, frowning.

I heard a soft moan from downstairs.

"Sounds like someone else has the right idea," I said, grinning and looking from his eyes to his lips and leaning in once more. He pushed me away lightly.

"Emmett and Rosalie always have that idea," Edward said. "We really shouldn't. I could hurt you or the baby," he said, shaking his head.

"Please?" I begged. "It's been months..."

"I want to," Edward said, "but..."

I cut him off with a kiss. "Don't you want me?" I pleaded.

"You know I do!" Edward exclaimed in a pained voice.

"I'll let you know if you get... carried away," I said, deliberately letting my hand trail near his groin. "I just need this tonight. I need to know that you really love me."

"How can you question that?" Edward asked, shaking his head.

In all reality, I needed to know that I loved Edward more than I loved Jacob. I needed to feel something more for Edward to take my mind off of the baby and Jacob, and this was the only way I knew how to do it.

I kissed him passionately and he responded, picking me up and rolling us over. He pulled back suddenly.

"What about the baby?" he asked, his eyes full of apprehension.

"What about it?" I asked, wraping my arms around his neck.

"Are you sure it's safe?" he asked, frowning.

"Positive," I said quickly, reaching for the buttons to my nightshirt. "I asked Rosalie."

"You planned this," he said. It wasn't a question.

"Maybe," I said, grinning. "Can you blame me?"

He didn't answer. He kissed me deeply, reaching for the buttons to his own shirt, impatiently tearing it off at the last minute. I slid down underneath Edward, frantically reaching for the buttons to my nightshirt. Edward reached for it, making to rip it open.

"I like this shirt," I warned him. He simply nodded, unbuttoning the buttons at the speed of light and throwing it across the room. I shifted underneath him, trying to alleviate the growing tension between my thighs.

Edward pulled my sweatpants down, sticking his hand between my legs, softly massaging me, kissing his way down my neck. I moaned, lifting my hips up toward his hand. I frantically reached for his belt buckle.

"Wait," he murmured in my ear.

"What?" I breathed.

Edward slidd won the bed, between my thighs, taking my underwear off in one fell swoop. I leaned back, spreading my thighs, eager for him. He traced circles on the inside of my thigh with his tongue, drawing ever closer to my center, but never quite reaching it. I bucked my hips impatiently.

"Always the impatient one, aren't you?" he grinned at me.

I didn't answer him. I needed to feel him pleasure me, show me that he loved me, something. I needed to feel something... to feel _alive. _He flicked his tongue over my center and I jumped uncomfortably.

"Are you okay?" he asked, frowning at me.

"I'm fine," I muttered. "Keep going."

He continued his ministrations, actions that would normally have me climiaxing in a matter of minutes. I couldn't concentrate. I kept thinking of how _Jacob _had made love to me.... I wanted Edward to do the same things Jacob had. But he couldn't. He didn't know how.

Edward eventually gave up and made his way back up to my lips, kissing me passionately, being slightly rougher than he normally was. I knew he could tell something was on my mind, that something was different. I couldn't bring myself to pretend with Edward. I was confused.

I reached for his belt buckle once more, thinking that maybe once he was inside me, things would progress and that he would be able to make me forget about Jacob. He didn't fight me this time. I knew he was frustrated.

I was wet enough. Not as wet as I had been when Jacob and I had made love, but wet enough for things to progress. Edward pulled his pants all the way off and threw them across the room to join the rest of our clothes.

He entered me carefully, apprehensively, treating me like porcelain. It angered me. I didn't want to be treated like glass, like some breakable object. I didn't feel completely filled. I felt like somethingw as missing. I wrapped my arms around Edward, grinding myself against him. He gasped, looking down at me, his eyes wide with lust.

"Oh, Bella!" he crooned, setting a steady rhythm.

I gave into my imagination, imagining Jacob touching me, imagining Jacob holding me, suckling me, filling me. Edward watched me curiously, thrusting harder and harder with each thrust. I wondered if he had noticed how quiet I was being compared to usual.

I suddenly remembered Jacob setting a constant, drilling rhythm in the middle of a dirt path on the outskirts of the reservation; Jacob on top of me, suckling my breast, setting a conscious rhythm with his hand, his fingers inside of me; Jacob holding me in my old bedroom at Charlie's after we weretogether for the first time... It all hit me like a flash.

"Oh, Jacob!" I moaned aloud.

Edward froze, bringing me back to reality. His jaw dropped and he looked at me in horror, like I had just slapped him.

I paused, not sure what to say or what to do. Edward pulled out of me and grabbed his dress pants, shoving them on. He picked up the rest of the clothes on the floor and threw them at me. Then, he headed out the door, a look of disgust on his face, slamming the door behind him.

I curled up on the bed, hugging my knees to my chest. I ddin't know what else to do but cry. What was happening to me? What had I just done?

* * *

I wasn't sure how long I'd been in our bedroom. It felt like an eternity. THe sun was rising, setting the whole room in a bright orange glow. A soft knock came at the door.

"Come in," I said, trying to hide the emotion in my voice.

It was Alice.

"What happened?" she asked, sitting down on my bed, tucking my hair behind my ear.

"He didn't tell you?" I sniffed, wiping away the tears trailing down my cheeks with the back of my hand.

"I didn't ask," she said kindly. "They left a few minutes ago to go hunting. It's just me and Esme here now."

"Oh," I said, hugging my knees to my chest again. "I feel like I stabbed him in the chest," I cried. I knew Edward hadn't needed to go hunting. He was probably off thinking, considering he had just gone hunting the day before.

"I'm sure you didn't," Alice said. Her expression wasn't too convincing. "What happened?"

"We were in the middle of... well, you know," I started awkwardly.

"Making love?" Alice suggested brusquely.

"Yeah," I said, blushing. "And in the middle, I said the wrong name... Jacob's name." I hung my shoulders in same. "I don't even know why!"

"I'm not the expert on pregnancy around here," Alice said. "Carlisle or Rosalie would be able to tell you much better than I could. But maybe it was just pregnancy brain. Maybe you just... forgot. I know it's not a very good reason, but I'm sure these things happen occasionally."

"I don't think that's what it is," I murmured. "You can't tell Edward what I'm about to tell you."

"Of course not. I'll just translate the Battle Hymn of the Republic into a foreign language like I did during graduation," she grinned. I knew she was trying to make me smile, to lighten up the situation, to make me feel better, but I didn't want her to. I didn't deserve that.

"Alice, I don't know what's wrong with me!" I cried. "I was supposed to be making love to my husband, but I was envisioning it with someone else! I kept thinking about what _Jacob_ was doing, how _he_ was touching me, how_ he_ was making me feel... " I broke off in embarrassment.

Alice's eyes were wide with shock when I finally had the nerve to look back up at her.

"Do you love Jacob?" she asked me.

"I know I love Jacob, but I love Edward more. I'm supposed to be getting over Jacob. It's supposed to be easier than this!" I buried my face into my hands.

"Are you sure you love Edward more?" Alice asked, placing one cool hand on my knee. "Or are you staying with Edward because you married him and just had to make a decision?"

"I don't know," I whispered.

Alice hugged me.

"We'll get through this," she said. "You'll figure things out. No matter what happens, you're still my sister, okay?" She hugged me tightly. "Jasper's with Edward," she added. "He told me that he was going to try to make him feel a little better."

"I'm not leaving Edward," I told her. "I refuse to leave Edward, no matter what my feelings are toward Jacob."

"I know," Alice replied soothingly.

"Do you still see me becoming a vampire?" I asked her, starting to cry once more.

She looked at me sadly. "The vision's foggy, blurry... I can't see anything. I see you with Edward because that's what you've decided. The rest just isn't clear."

I cried even harder, burying my face into the duvet. Why did things have to be so difficult? Why couldn't I be normal for once?

* * *

_**A/N: **I had to once again, re-type this chapter. In the middle, I accidentally hit the backspace button and had to re-type it all over again. UGH. But at any rate, I hope you found the chapter interesting._

_I really do like Alice. She's my favorite character, after Jacob, of course. I'm really excited to see what Leah's going to be like in _New Moon_ though. I really like her, but I can't remember how big her part is in _New Moon_. It's not that big. :( I really like Emmett's personality. So maybe we'll see him a little bit. :D_

_Ugh. _New Moon_ needs to hurry up and hit theatres. :(_

_Please remember to review! That's the only payment I get for this. I'm only a poor college student... lol..._

_On another note, I need some new adjectives to refer to the Cullens'... house. Like lair, coven, dungeon, manor, cove, etc._

_Also, some people have mentioned that because I have Jacob and Bella describing their child's possible skin tone as a shade lighter than Jacob's that the comment came off as slightly offensive. I want to assure you that I was not trying to offend anyone by that comment. It is just my personal experience that when children are born and their parents' skin tones differ, their skin comes out some sort of shade between. I was trying to illustrate that fact, not offend anyone. So I'm sorry if that was taken out of context._

_Finally, I would like to thank all of my reviewers. You guys are absolutely amazing. I have met so many peopl eonline, having written this and I really appreciate all of the support. I was on a thread for_ New Moon _yesterday and saw where someone (blackbeauty something) had menioned this story and I was so happy about it! A couple of other people have told me that there was a discussion on Fanforum about it. I don't know what that is or where it's at, but I really do appreciate all of the support. If anyone does know where that discussion is, I'd really love to post there and join it as well._

_Anyways, thanks for reading! Please review!  
xoxo_

_Hope you guys enjoyed the chapter! Please review!_

_Thanks for reading!  
xoxo_


	9. All Over You

Chapter 9 -- All Over You

* * *

Disclaimer: I do not own Jacob Black nor do I know anyone who personally does. Everything you recognize belongs to Stephenie Meyer. Everything else, I DO claim. Yippee. :)

* * *

A/N: So, this chapter was not part of the original story that I wrote. I had finished the entire fic and then listened the The Spill Canvas's "All Over You" and I knew I HAD to incorporate that song into this fic somehow. The song is just SO BlackSwan. This scene takes place the same night as Bella's whoopsie with Edward. LOL. Anywho, I hope you enjoy the chapter... and I really hope it's not too out of place.

* * *

Bella was on my mind. I mean, she was on my mind any other day, too. But I woke up in the middle of the night for no reason, with Bella on my mind. I was getting sick and tired or thinking of her for absolutely no reason, how thoughts of her would intrude upon my dreams and thoughts every single day. This infatuation wasn't healthy... this obsession wouldn't have been as bad had Edward not have come up with that stupid plan. And now, Bella was pregnant with my child and I couldn't get her out of my head even when I had tried and sung the Hallelujah chorus at the top of my lungs. Not that I'd tried or anything... well... okay, I did. It was rather embarrassing.

_Yeah he's a looker,  
but I really think it's guts that matter most.  
I displayed them for you,  
strewn out about from coast to coast.  
I am easily make believe,  
just dress me up in what you want me to be.  
I'll take back what I've been saying for quite some time now._

And honestly, I didn't even think Edward Cullen was really that good-looking. Not to be conceited or anything, but every time I'd look in the mirror, I'd think to myself, "Man, I'm so much better looking than he is." Not that I was being vain or anything, but it was _true_. Edward and I were physically complete opposites. What did she see in the pasty snowflake anyway? I had no clue.

I was better for her than Cullen. Okay, face it. I was _better_ than Cullen period. I had more heart than Cullen. I fought tooth and nail for Bella and I was still doing it. I was paying for it dearly, too. She was pregnant with _my_ child and I had no idea what kind of relationship I was going to have with my kid when all of this was said and done. I had been foolish, giving into my emotions and feelings, rather than thinking things through rationally. But who's to say that love was something rationa? Love is an emotion, right? I kept thinking that over and over again. _Gee, glad you finally figured that one out_, I thought bitterly, wanting to kick myself for being stupid. As much as Bella said she hated me sometimes, hate was a passionate emotion. Sometimes I'd rather her feel hate toward me rather than nothing at all. Pretty stupid, huh?

In all reality, I needed Bella. Cullen was a drug for Bella; Bella was a drug to me. Her smile, how her cheeks lit up with embarrassment, how cute she was when she blushed, how her small hands seemed to be so... _fragile. _Bella just _looked_ fragile and I was scared to death that he was going to hurt her by being stupid.

_  
I gotta feel you in my bones again,  
I'm all over you.  
I'm not over you.  
I wanna taste you one more time again,  
I'm all over you.  
I'm not over you._

Bella. There was nothing I wanted more than to pull her into my arms right at that very moment. To apologize. To tell her that I had been so incredibly dense and a typical teenage idiot. But she wasn't even talking to me. I had no idea if she even missed me. Hell, she was probably in bed right then with that -- I immediately diverted my mind from that particularly dangerous thought right away. I really didn't need that at all. That was toxic poison to me. It hurt too much.

_  
In my daydreams, in my sleep,  
infatuation turning into disease.  
You could cure me, see all you have to do now  
is please try.  
Give it your best shot and try.  
All I'm asking for is love,  
but you never seem to have enough._

I closed my eyes and turned back over in bed, trying to clear my thoughts. I felt broken. Like something was missing. I wondered what life would be like? I mean, she was going to choose Edward now. We were going to share custody of our baby... I wondered if she would ever think about what she gave up. I wondered if she would think about the lfie we could have had. I wouldn't show our kid how weak I was... how much in love I was with his or her mother I really was. The kid might think Bella was being unfair for never really giving me a chance. But I'd have to move on. Even though I'd probably never fully get over her, I would have to make an effort.

I could move on. Leah had feelings for me. Leah and I could date. Leah was nice enough. We had become good friends lately. I mean, they say love is friendship on fire, don't they? I'd just have to look around some matches somewhere. Leah and I could get married, have children... I mean, maybe not until this phasing thing was under control and her cycles re-regulated themselves.

Oh, God. What was wrong with me? It was about three in the morning and I was lying there, looking up at the ceiling, thinking about Leah's menstrual cycle. I tried to clear my thoughts, but this time, I wondered how long someone could be tortured before they literally went insane.

I gotta feel you in my bones again,  
I'm all over you.  
I'm not over you.  
I wanna taste you one more time again,  
I'm all over you.  
I'm not over you.  
This life is way too short  
to get caught up in all this stuff  
when I just want you to love me back,  
why can't you just love me back?

Why can't you just love me back?  
(why can't you, why can't you)  
Why can't you just love me back?  
(why can't you, why can't you)  
Why can't you just love me back?  
(why can't you, why can't you just love)

I was so weak. I was crying. Jacob Black, the big Alpha wolf, was crying over a fucking girl. WHY? WHY DIDN'T SHE LOVE ME ENOUGH? What did I do? What didn't I do? I refused to believe that she didn't have feelings for me anymore? I had been there for her when she had hit rock bottom. Surely that had to have left a mark somewhere... maybe small, maybe not. Bella had told me she had loved me... not just liked me and not just loved me a a friend or a brother. Bella had admitted that she had had romantic feelings for me, but she just wen toff and married the bloodsucker and then enver seemed to care about me at all afterwards. WHY did Bella have to be so... _stupid? _stupid wasn't the right word. But confusing, hard to read, strange... wait. I forgot. Isabella Swan (I refused to think of her new last name) was a girl. And all girls are confusing, right? Leah could be just as confusing as Bella at times. Except for I had the luxury of being able to read Leah's thoughts, at least while we were in wolf form. Even then, though... I still hadn't had a clue that Leah had feelings for me.

And as much as I appreciated Leah's friendship, I knew that I couldn't have a relationship with her. I did care about Leah. I mean, I had jumped in front of a bloodsucker and had gotten seriously hurt to save her... that was what? Nearly a year beforehand? I knew Leah hadn't forgotten about that. I knew sshe was grateful and I knew her feelings toward me had changed aftewards. She had stopped thinking of me as such an annoying twit, at least. Or that's what I had thought. Maybe that's when she started having... _romantic_ feelings for me. I could barely get my thoughts around the concept. If Leah really and truly loved me, maybe she would accept me as damaged goods. Maybe she would accept me even if she knew I loved Bella more. But Leah didn't deserve to be second best to Bella, just like I didn't deserve to be second-best to Edward.

The whole situation was fucking insane. I closed my eyes again and could only imagine the scene I wanted more than anything: Bella's lips on mine, my arms around her protectively. Our baby in between us... my hands wrapped around her belly. I groaned. The scene was just too painful. I didn't know what to do to get rid of it.

I got up and stumbled toward the the bathroom and ran water in the bathroom sink. I splashed water on my face, trying to sober up my thoughts... they had me high as a kite and I couldn't find my normal plateau. The depression was getting to me. No matter how bad I wanted to live in that world... live in a world where Bella loved me and we were together, raising our child... it wouldn't happen and I needed to realize that. In reality, we were just two stupid kids who got into a situation way above our heads. In reality, Edward was supposed to be the smart one, having been here for over a hundred years. He should have been smart enough to see this coming... see the pain and torture this would cause for everyone involved. I loathed him for his idiocy. I loathed him period.

I gotta feel you in my bones again,  
I'm all over you.  
I'm not over you.  
I wanna taste you one more time again,  
I'm all over you.  
I'm not over you.  
This life is way too short  
to get caught up and all mixed up  
when I just want you to love me back,  
why can't you just love me back?

But in the end, I needed Bella. She was the only one I needed. Not Leah. I knew that deep down in my heart. I would never find anyone unless it was Bella. I _wanted_ her with a raw, pure emotion that I knew the bloodsucker would never be able to understand. In reality, I loved Bella more than he ever would, more than he would ever be capable of. Because love was a _human_ emotion and the asshole wasn't even human.

_  
Why won't you just love me back?  
_

I headed back into my room and curled up into the fetal position on my bed. I closed my eyes and did the best I coudl to block out the images flooding my mind and my thoughts, engraving themselves on the back of my eyelids. Near sunrise, I finally fell back asleep.

_  
Why can't you just love me back?_

* * *

_Short, I know. But I plan on typing up the next chapter and posting it tonight or tomorrow, since I don't have school. I just figured this story was missing a completely _raw_ scene like this and that we really needed an in-depth look into the thoughts that Jake described as being so toxic. Also, I'm trying to work to clear up the Leah plot hole. I finished the story and realized that I had never paired Leah up with anyone and that she had gotten hear heart broken in the end. I may change that or I may just leave it alone. Hehe. :)_

_Thanks for reading! Please review!  
__xoxo_


	10. Come Away With Me

Chapter 10 -- Come Away With Me

* * *

Disclaimer: If you're looking for Jacob Black, I don't own him. If you know where he is, please let me know. :)

* * *

The next three weeks were filled with silence. I eventually came to the conclusion that when Bella was ready to talk to me, she would. Bella wouldn't stay away for forever. I knew that if there was one thing I really knew about her, she _couldn't _stay away. In the meantime, I promised myself that I would be supportive of her and that our next conversation would not turn into a screaming match like most of our conversation had since we had... copulated. I tried to stay positive after I had hit rock bottom and for the most part, it had worked. Of course, I had had a few missteps, I won't lie. But for the most part, it seemed that after I had made the conscious decision to stop obsessing over Bella, my life had started to turn back around, just slightly.

I woke up one Sunday afternoon after a night of patrolling the perimeter, only to find a note on my nightstand. It was from Billy.

_Jake,  
Bella called this morning. She wants you to stop by the Cullens' when you wake up. I guess they want to talk to you about the baby. Charlie and I are going to his place to watch the game today. I figured you might want the house to yourself... I know we've been spending a lot of time here.  
Dad_

_How many people are as lucky as me to have a dad as great as Billy? _I wondered to myself as I got dressed. I wondered what Bella wanted. As far as I knew, we still weren't exactly talking. I'd lost track of how far along she must have been by that point. Four months? Five months? Something like that.

I headed out for the Cullens' dungeon at around two-thirty or so. I pulled the Rabbit in front of their massive garage and sat idly for a few minutes, just thinking. It had been a while since I had been here. I'd really lost track of time. I sat in the Rabbit, my eyes closed, thinking about how much I missed Bella and how much I wanted to make all the time up to her that I'd wasted by being a jackass. I wondered if I'd ever get the chance.

I was so immersed in thought that I didn't notice she she was standing outside my window. I looked up and jumped. She started laughing.

"Gosh, Jake," she said, shaking her head. "You really need to clean out your ears. I've been standing here for a while now."

"I'm sorry," I said, rolling down the window. "I was sort of... distracted."

"Obviously," she said, rolling her eyes. "Can I come sit with you?"

"Sure," I said, smiling at her.

She walked back around the front of the car and for the first time, I noticed how _big_ she had gotten since I'd last seen her. Her belly was defined now and her walk had turned into a slight waddle. _That's my child_, I thought to myself. The thought secretly thrilled me.

She climbed into the passenger-side seat and sat down.

"You look great," I said, smiling.

"Thanks," she said. "You too."

"You wanted to talk?" I asked her. "Billy went to Charlie's and left a note on my nightstand this morning, saying you'd called."

She nodded. "Do you want to go back to the reservation?" she asked.

"Really?" I asked, confused. "Are you sure Edward doesn't want to be part of this conversation?"

"I'm sure," she said. Her tone suggested annoyance and I fell still further into confusion.

"Uh, okay," I said awkwardly, starting the engine. I pulled out of the driveway and onto the main road outside of their propery. "So, how far along are we?" I asked, glancing at her belly.

"Five months today," she said, resting a hand on top of it. "Your daughter is absolutely fascinated with my ribcage. She keeps kickboxing at it."

"Daughter?" I gasped. "It's a girl?" I asked, my eyes widening in shock.

"Yeah," Bella said. "I've known for about two weeks, I guess. I could have sworn she was a boy, the way she kicks. She's so active."

I smiled, keeping my eyes on the road.

"Sounds like we're going to have our hands full," I replied.

Bella nodded.

I was confused. Where was the angry Bella, the one who couldn't stand being around me? Why were things so easy all of a sudden? It was almost like we had never argued, almost like how things were two years back, like we were just discussing motorcycles or something.

As we entered the reservation, I noticed Leah and Seth walking down the road. I waved to them. Seth smiled at me brightly. Leah's eyes didn't avert from the ground.

"Have you talked to her?" Bella asked me.

"No," I admitted. "I've been avoiding her, to tell you the truth."

"That can't be an easy feat, being in the same pack with her... and that pack only having three wolves."

"It's not," I sighed. "Seth said she's been rather distant lately. I don't know what to do. I'm not in any shape to be in a relationship right now. And even if I was, I don't think I'd want to be with Leah. I'm trying to concentrate on getting ready to be a dad right now, not running around with girls."

Bella frowned.

"What?" I asked her.

"I just keep thinking that you're only seventeen... you should be having your own life right now, figuring out where you want to be and how to get there, what you want to do withi your life... not hung up over me and this baby. I mean, originally, it was decided that this would be MY baby and I would be the one deciding who I wanted to be with..." she trailed off.

"Well," I said, sighing. "I thought I could live with just having this baby to make you happy. But I guess after we... well, you know... I just felt _bonded _to you. I can't really explain it. Once it became clear that we were really having a baby, I felt the need to both both you and it... _her_. I got upset and wanted to have a greater role in both of your lives. You can call it rescinding my side of the offer, if you want. I just didn't realize I was going to feel such an urge to step up and be a part of this child's life until the child in question was already in existence."

Bella looked over at me and smiled sadly. "We really didn't think this through enough did we?" she asked. "I think we were both emotional basket cases at that point and Edward just figured you'd do whatever I told you to."

I decided to ignore the "basket case" comment. I changed the subject. "So how are things with you and Edward?" I asked. "Has Alice finished the nursery?" I pulled into the driveway and parked the Rabbit, pulling the key out of the ignition.

"Please, can we talk about something else besides me and Edward?" she asked, falling back into the passenger-side seat.

"Why? Is something wrong?" I asked, genuinely concerned.

"Edward and I have been... well, not arguing exactly, but he's been upset with me for about a month. Let's just say I made a really big mistake and he's trying to get over it, but it's been hard on us both," she said, looking down at her belly and sighing.

"Is it the baby?" I asked her. "Surely he can't be mad at the baby or something like that."

"No," Bella sighed. "It's not the baby. It's something else."

"What could you have done to make him upset?" I wondered aloud. "He already thinks the sun shines out of your every orifice."

She laughed.

"Let me assure you that it most certainly does not," she replied, looking back at me. "I'd tell you what happened, but you'd probably either be grossed out or you'd take what I'd tell you and think too much of it."

"Let me guess," I said calculatedly. "It has something to do with me."

"A little more than something. More like everything to do with you," she sighing, looking out the window.

"Well, this is more than we've talked for the past five months," I said quietly. "I don't understand what I could have done."

"It's not you. It's me," she said awkwardly, looking back at me. "Edward and I were having sex and I accidentally moaned your name." She blushed an endearing shade of scarlet.

My jaw dropped.

"WHAT?" I exclaimed. Of all of the things she could have possibly told me, that had to have been the one I was least expecting.

Bella blushed even brighter, her cheeks turning almost maroon.

"I didn't mean to," she whispered. "I don't know what happened. I guess I just couldn't stop thinking about everything... And I kept remembering how distant we had been and I missed you."

"Wow," I said, trying to recover from the shock. "That can't have gone over well."

"Obviously," Bella said. "I just needed to get out of the house. I couldn't stand being around him at all today. We've agreed that we were going to try to work things out, but things have just been... difficult."

I nodded.

"I can understand that," I replied. "I'm sorry."

Bella just looked at me sadly. "I feel like it's my fault," she said. "Edward loves me more than I think anyone's ever loved anyone and yet I had to go and break his heart, not even meaning to. I don't know what happened."

For once, I had enough sense to keep my mouth shut and not tell her she was dead wrong. I loved her more than Edward ever could.

"Why were we so distant afterwards?" I asked her suddenly.

"What do you mean?" she asked, frowning. I knew she knew exactly what I meant.

"After we found out about the baby. I mean, I know I told you off and I didn't have the right to do so. I was upset and everything... but going this long without really talking to each other... right now, it seems kind of pointless," I clarified.

"You've missed a lot," she murmured, running a hand over her belly. "The pregnancy's halfway over."

"You should say 'halfway begun,'" I teased. "It makes it sound just a little better than 'halfway over.' Besides, I have the next eighteen years to be there, don't I?" I asked her.

But that doesn't make any sense," she countered, shaking her head.

"You're right," I sighed.

"I do want you to have a bigger role in the baby's life, but I'm not going to leave Edward. You realize that?" she asked.

I nodded, looking out the window.

She suddenly winced and placed one hand to her back.

"What?" I asked, turning around and looking at her worriedly. "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine," she said. "Somebody's just beating the crap out of me from the inside out."

I grinned. "Wonder where she gets that from?" I asked, looking at Bella pointedly.

"That's got to be your side of the family because it's most definitely not mine," she said, pulling her arm back around to her lap. She looked up at me. "Do you want to feel her kick?" she asked, looking at me with an almost shy expression on her face.

"Could I?" I breathed, biting my bottom lip.

She nodded. She grabbed my hand and placed it on her belly. I scooted over to her and felt my daughter -- _my daughter_ -- nudge against my hand. I gasped.

"That's her?" I asked, completely captivated.

Bella simply nodded. She rested her hand on top of mine and sighed contentedly, resting her head on my shoulder. I noticed the ring on her ring finger and vaguely wondered if Edward ever did anything halfway. The ring was utterly magnificent. I could tell it was old... it had to have been from the late 1800s, maybe even older.

"I've missed you, Jake," Bella said, looking back up at me. "We really can't go five months without talking again."

"You can say that one again," I said, looking down at her.

I noticed the baby wasn't moving anymore. I took my hand away from her belly.

Bella didn't move.

"This is as calm as she's been since I've felt her move for the first time," Bella said quietly. "I wonder if she knows you're here."

"Maybe," I murmured.

"Maybe she just knows I feel safe when I'm with you," Bella said, her voice quavering above a whisper.

"Do you?" I asked her, resting my cheek on the top of her head.

Bella nodded once more. She looked up at me and for the first time I noticed how close her face was to mine, too close. I pulled away, clearing my throat.

We sat in silence for a bit longer.

"Can we go inside?" Bella asked suddenly. "I like sitting here with you in the car, but I wouldn't mind going inside where there's a bit more room."

"I thought you were never going to ask," I laughed.

We got out of the car and headed into the house. I shut the door behind us and Bella shrugged off her jacket, laying it over the back of the couch.

"Can we just have a human moment?" she asked, looking over at me. "Watch a movie? Have dinner? Do something together?"

"You want to watch a movie?" I asked incredulously.

"Yes," Bella said firmly. "A movie." She picked up the remote controller to the TV and pressed it into my hand. "Pick something."

I grinned once again at the expression on her face. She headed over to the cabinets and rummaged through them.

"At least you can grocery shop," she said. "I don't know how Charlie even survived before Sue moved in."

"He spent a lot of time down at the diner, from what I hear," I said, answering her question.

Bella grinned.

"Chicken Pot Pie?" she asked, pulling out a large vat from the freezer. "It's the only thing big enough I see that's easy to make. You haven't eaten, have you?"

"No," I answered. "Chicken Pot Pie sounds great. It's easy to make, too," I agreed.

She opened the package and stuck it in the oven, turning the dial to the appropriate temperature. She came back over and joined me, where I was flipping through channels on the TV.

"Ooh! _Alice in Wonderland!_" she said, pointing ecstatically.

"Sure," I laughed. "A little kid's cartoon with zillions of drug references. That's what you want to watch?"

"Please?" she begged, pouting.

"Fine," I said, setting the remote controller back on the coffee table. I leaned back into the couch, relaxing. Bella leaned into me and I wrapped my arms around her, letting my hands rest on her belly. My mind was in overdrive. I couldn't figure out what had changed, why Bella was being so nice to me all of a sudden... why she was even talking to me _now._

"You're so warm," she murmured, leaning into me. My breath caught in my throat. Why was she doing this? This wasn't the Bella I had known from the last few months. This was an entirely different Bella. I couldn't focus on the movie, not that I even wanted to. I cleared my throat and she looked up at me.

"What?" she asked, frowning.

"I think we need to talk," I said, tearing my eyes away from her.

She sat up. "What's wrong?" she asked.

I gaped at her. "What's _wrong?_" I repeated incredulously.

She stared at me in complete silence, her facial expression wavering somewhere between confusion and anxiousness.

"You haven't talked to me in months," I said, folding my arms. "Let me refresh your memory for you, Bella. Our last decent conversation was a compromise on what we were going to do concerning our child because you were married to Edward and we decided to share custody." I took a deep breath. "I'm confused. What is this? Is your marriage to the bloodsucker going sour, so you decided to come to me to see if I still wanted you? Because quite frankly, that's the only possible reason I can think of that would lead you and I to be watching _Alice in Wonderland_, cuddling on a couch. It just doesn't make sense!" I exclaimed vehemently.

"You're right," Bella said, sighing. She turned the TV off. "My relationship with Edward is... _strained_ right now. But I'm married to him and I _have _to make this work. I owe it to him. He's my husband. But you know just as well as I do that I can't just let you walk out of my life. I've always wanted some... claim on you, I guess."

"You're the mother of my child," I said, looking into her eyes. "I think that's enough of a claim."

She looked at me like I had slapped her.

"Jake, you are my _best _friend. For the longest time, you were my replacement sun -- "

"I don't want to be someone's replacement sun!" I groaned. "I deserve more than to just be someone's light bulb! If your darling _Eddie _is your sun, then what am I? I am going to be everything for our daughter, but I can't be second best for you anymore, Bells." I tucked a piece of her dark brown hair behind one of her ears. "It hurts too much."

Bella looked stricken. "I don't want to sit on a reservation for the rest of my life while you go hunt vampires. I don't want to be the one anxiously waiting for you to come back, reading Quileute legends to our kids. Leah would do that. That's how Leah was raised. That's not how I was raise.d Renee left Charlie because she didn't want to be stuck in Forks for the rest of her life. As much as I love you, I don't want that life. And obviously, you don't want to be second-best if I'm married to Edward. I'm not leaving him. And I'm not going to carry on some relationship with you while I'm married to him, either."

"So this is just business," I said dryly. "For our daughter."

"Jake..." Bella said helplessly. "Don't be like that."

"Be like what? Don't guard myself from you because I know I'm in love with you and I can't do anything about it? Sorry Bella," I said, shrugging. "I'm not going to be your fool."

"Can't we just sit here and watch a movie and not argue for once? I'm so sick of fighting with you."

I nodded.

"I am, too," I breathed in relief. Finally, she was saying something I was thinking. "If you want to finish watching the movie, then fine." I turned the TV back on and watched Alice swell up, one huge foot pushing the white rabbit back down the stairs. I flopped back into the soft leather couch and Bella curled up against my legs.

If Bella was the white rabbit, then maybe I was Alice. Or the male version of Alice, anyway. Maybe Alice's Wonderland was Forks... or La Push... or whatever you wanted to call it. Maybe I was fruitlessly chasing Bella, just like Alice was chasing the white rabbit, only to wake up to find that it was all a dream and the white rabbit didn't even exist in the first place.

But Bella did exist. She was sitting on the couch, mere inches from me, and the bulge that made up her belly was our baby. I didn't know if I'd ever reach Bella... if I'd ever get her before it was too late. Because if Edward Cullen won, Bella would be gone forever... and it would be as if she never existed in the first place. I would have to sit through her funeral, like she was a victim in some freak accident, comfort Charlie and Renee as they mourned the death of their beloved daughter, deal with the wrath of the rest of the tribe once the Cullens broke the treaty. In a hundred years, no one would know who Bella Swan was or that she had even existed. But she would still be here... cold as ice, an undead ice box.

I shivered, not from the cold, but at the very thought of an ice-cold Bella with red eyes... a Bella from my deepest, darkess nightmares.

* * *

_Another chapter finished. :) Hope you guys liked it!_

_I have watched Twilight countless times over the last few days. When I wrote this chapter, I didn't have a TV or internet access or a phone, so I sat on my couch, using my laptop to watch _Twilight, Baby Mama, The Princess Diaries 2, _and _Cruel Intentions_ over and over and over again. Torture. It got pretty pathetic._

_I'm sorry about any possible typos. I'm still typing from my laptop to this old monster desktop because my laptop won't connect to the internet. :(_

_Anyways, thanks for reading! Please review!  
xoxo_


	11. Too Much to Think About

Chapter 11 -- Too Much to Think About

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Disclaimer: I don't own anything that you recognize. The plot is mine... that's about it. I don't like not owning Twilight, but oh well... that's life. I'm obviously not Stephenie Meyer (even though she's as awesome as I am. :P)

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I couldn't figure out what was going on with Rosalie.

I had thought she hated me. I had thought she couldn't stand me, that she was jealous of me because I was human, and that I had everything that she had ever wanted. All Rosalie ever wanted was to be human, to get married, and to have children with Emmett. Sadly, she would never get that opportunity. I could tell that the jealousy was eating her alive. When she looked at me, I could see the pain behind her amber-colored eyes. She tired to disguise it, but from the expression on Edward's face every time he walked by her, I knew she was being tortured. I felt awful. I knew she was making do with reading up on pregnancy and helping me by answering all of my questions, but I knew it was only because she was trying to live through me. I found it slightly uncomfortable.

However, right around the time I turned six months, Rosalie's demeanor changed. It was ever so slight at first; I barely noticed it. However, when she smiled at me for the first time, my mind immediately went into overdrive. Why was she smiling at me? Was she planning something? Did she have some sort of secret agenda? Did she want to take my baby and mother it herself?

I never told Edward was I was thinking. I knew he knew that something was bothering me, but he never asked what. Looking back, I'm sure he must have pegged it all down on Jacob.

Jacob. That was another thing that was eating me alive. I still hadn't worked out exactly how I felt about him. I knew Jacob wasn't only my best friend and the father of my child. I regretted the words I had spoken to him the last time we had really spent any time together. _I don't want to be stuck on some reservation somewhere, reading Quileute stories to our kids. _Kids. The problem was, I could easily imagine myself with Jacob, with Norah sitting at our feet, my belly swollen and round with another child, Jacob's arm draped around me protectively.

Another picture contrasted sharply with that. The statuesque Edward, hard as granite, standing guard, trying to protect me and Norah... protecting the child of a werewolf, his natural enemy.

The latter image didn't set well with me. I couldn't figure out why. The first one seemed warm, seemed _right_, but I couldn't see how it would ever work... not when I was married to Edward. Not when I owed Edward my whole heart.

The problem was that an increasing amount of the love I had for Edward was crumbling away... I could_ feel _it. It was almost tangible. I knew that the love I had for Edward was fading, only to be replaced with this new feeling I had for Jacob.

I had been pushing the realization of this away. I _had _to make things work with Edward. I didn't have a choice. Edward didn't deserve to have his heart broken. I wasn't going to be the one to do it. I would die before I hurt him.

The weeks seemed to be flying by now. One week flew past and then another, then another. I didn't know how to keep the time from flying by. Alice tried to keep me as occupied as possible.

"Alice," I asked her one gray Tuesday morning in February, "can I ask you a question?"

We were sitting in her room, the loft up on the third floor of the house. I loved Alice's room. The walls were a very bright, cheery yellow and the ceiling was sort of vaulted, shaped in the form of the rooftop. A hammock hung near a window, a bookcase adjacent to it. I knew that that was where Alice did most of her reading and studying. A trapdoor was in the corner, underneath was a winding staircase that reached down to the end of the hallway on the second floor.

"You already have," she replied, looking up at the ceiling dully. For some reason, she wasn't her usual bright, chipper self.

"Are you just hanging around me to make sure I'm not going to break Edward's heart?" I asked her abruptly.

She gaped at me.

"Of course not!" she said. "You're my friend first, Bella. This _thing _between you and Edward doesn't concern me."

I nodded.

"You're going to ask me another question," she said, this time smiling.

"How did you know?" I asked stupidly. I'd been planning on asking her about the nursery project.

"I've known what day you were going to ask me about the nursery for a while now," she admitted. "It _is _Tuesday, the sixteenth."

I couldn't help but laugh.

"Since I'm not blessed with extraordinary divination skills, why don't you enlighten me?" I asked her.

"It's finished. Finished it last night, actually," she said brightly. "But for some reason, I don't see you using it very often," she added, pouting.

"What do you mean?" I asked quickly.

"Well, the baby is going to be with Jacob some of the time," she said. "And for some reason, I can't see as much of your future as I'm used to," she added, frowning. "I can only assume that you'll be spending a lot of time with Jacob in the future."

"Let's go see the nursery," I said, determined to stop talking about Jacob Black. I walked to the stairwell. "Is the nursery the upstairs room or the downstairs one?" I asked her.

"The upstairs one," she replied.

I slid open the trap door and walked down the tiny staircase, Alice behind me. She jumped ahead of me and skipped down the hall to the room next to mine and Edward's.

"Close your eyes," she said, grinning.

I dutifully closed my eyes and she grabbed my hand and led me into the room.

"Now open them!" she exclaimed, her voice full of excitement.

I was standing in the middle of the room. The walls were a light jade color. Looking straight ahead, I saw Norah's name emblazoned in a dark violet on the wall: Norah Alice Black. I frowned and looked at Alice.

"Black?" I asked her.

"You won't be naming the baby after Edward," she said, shaking her head. "I see bits and pieces of a conversation between you and Edward deciding that. If that changes, I can just paint over the name and redo it."

I nodded, blankly, trying to ignore the sinking feeling in my chest. Under the name was a beautiful white crib, certainly an antique. It was decked out in a soft lilac and eggshell bedding with light green accents... utterly magnificent.

"Who's..." I trailed off, pointing at it.

"Esme had it, for the son that she lost," Alice said softly. "I asked her what kind of crib I thought I should get for you and she said that she wanted it in here. Each of us have put a little something in here for the baby. The crib was Esme's gift."

I felt tears stinging my eyes and I fought to keep them from spilling over. I continued to look around the room. A green and white teddy bear sat on a shelf in the corner, accompanied by a picture of the eight of us... a family portrait that had been taken not too long before.

"Emmett's," Alice commented, smiling and nodding toward the bear.

I blinked in disbelief and slight humor.

"Emmett?" I asked. Hadn't he been _attacked_ by a bear? Why did he want _that _in the baby's room?

"He said that every kid needs a teddy bear," she said, shrugging. "I'm not really sure why. I don't remember having a teddy bear," she sighed.

I continued to turn, looking around the room, taking everything in. An ornate rocking chair, upholstered in eggshell with dark violet accents, sat in the corner. A very pretty piece of paper sat on the seat, my name written in delicate script in purple ink.

"That would be Rosalie's gift," Alice said, nodding toward it. "She wrote you a letter, too."

I was stunned. "Rosalie?" I asked, as if I had heard Alice incorrectly.

"Yes," a soft voice said from behind me. "A friend of sorts made it for me."

I briefly wondered if this "friend" was the sort of aquaintance J. Jenks was with Jasper. Edward had mentioned that his father had made Alice a death certificate when they were trying to patch up the mystery around her death... a few humans had gotten a bit too curious about her disappearance.

"Thank you," I told Rosalie graciously.

"I hope you like the nursery," she said. "I think it's beautiful." She smiled at me before turning on her heel and walking out of the room without another word. Alice shrugged at me.

I looked toward the floor and saw a white toy chest next to the rocking chair. Tiny little green frogs were painted along the edges of it, the initials N.A.B. in violet script on the lid. I walked over and opened it, marveling at the detail someone had quite obviously put into it. Inside were several hand-knitted blankets, beautifully made, one in jade, one in lilac, and one in cream.

"That would be mine and Jasper's gift to you and Edward," Alice said, smiling. "I found it a long time ago in Philadelphia... actually, the same day I found Jasper. Jasper painted it and I made the blankets."

"Thank you!" I said, hugging her tightly.

"Carlisle," she said, nodding toward the wall. I let go of her and turned around. Above the closet was a map of Western Washington State, with Forks and La Push painted larger on the map. I took me a second to realize that the entire thing was hand-painted. I gasped. Charlie's house was painted in one corner, labeled Forks. On the opposite side was La Push, several tiny houses painted in great detail, surrounded by wolves. When I looked closer, I realized that the one in front of all of the others, closest to the treaty line, was Jacob, his reddish-brown russett fur seeming almost realistic on the wall. A bit higher up was our house with me and Edward, Carlisle and Esme, Alice and Jasper and Emmett and Rosalie.

In the middle was a large image of me and Edward... an excerpt of the picture resting on the shelf on the adjacent wall. A blank spot was left on the wall between the two of us. I frowned and looked toward Alice.

"Is it not finished?" I asked her.

She shook her head. "Carlisle is going to paint the baby there. We're just waiting until she's born to see what she is going to look like."

I gasped in disbelief. My family had gone to great lengths to make this place beautiful for me and the baby, regardless of whether Edward was her biological father or not. The nursery was personalized with a little bit of each of them... but I couldn't help but feel like something was missing. I looked back toward the wall, toward the tiny little image of Jacob's wolf.

Alice watched me, seeming to understand what was going through my head.

"Jacob dropped this by here the other day," she said, opening the closet door.

I looked at her in confusion.

"What?" I asked, shaking my head. Why would Jacob have come by? I hadn't noticed him come by...

"I twas when you were at Charlie's last weekend," she explained. "Jacob told me not to show this to you until we unveiled the nursery. He also said not to tell you that he had come by. I guess he figured it would have upset you." She reached into the closet and brought something out and placed it in my hands.

It was a dream catcher. And underneath the circular web of intricate string, there were three braids of suede. Connected to each were feathers of every color imaginable, beads going down each of the braids, and little carvings that matched the one I wore on my wrist. I knew he had carved them by himself... and that he had spent a very long time on this.

Alice handed me an envelope.

"He told me to give this to you," she said. She headed toward the door. "I need to finish your room," she said. I knew that was her way of giving me some privacy, to work things out in my head.

I headed toward the rocking chair, removed Rosalie's note, and sat down. I opened Jacob's letter first.

_Bella,  
I know it will be a while before you open this and I don't know whether or not I'll see you until after you do. I figured an explanation should go along with the gift and I didn't think Alice would get it right. For a bl -- , I mean, vampire, she's not really all that bad, I don't guess.  
Anyway, this is a dream catcher. It's supposed to keep all kinds of bad dreams away from the person who sleeps by it. So I'm hoping you'll keep it by the baby's crib. We don't want anything bad tainting the kid before she can even walk! I've made a matching one for the nursery I'm going to make. I know it's probably getting kinda close, but Billy and I have a plan that I'll tell you about later.  
So I guess I should explain a little bit about the dream catcher... and why it looks the way it does. THe three braids hanging down represent me, you, and the baby. The longest one is for me. It has the biggest feathers, the biggest beads, and ten wolves, representing the pack as it is now. I also put in letters that spell out D-A-D. The middle braid represents you. I wasn't really sure what to put on it, so I put things that remind me of you, how I like you best. Feathers in your favorite color, blue, beads in all sorts of colors, and little carvings of cacti (for Phoenix) and raindrops (for Forks) and little letters that spell out M-O-M. ANd then, the shortest braid is for the baby. I put pink beads and white feathers. I don't know what color the nursery is and it might not match it, but oh well. I was going to put her name on it, but I don't know what you've picked out. I'll add it whenever you pick out a name, or if you have, when you tell me what it is.  
Anway, I hope everything is going okay with you and the baby. I haven't been around very much... I've been busy with pack stuff. You should come over soon. I miss you.  
Jake_

I was stunned by the time I reached the end of the letter. I never thought that Jacob would actually take the time to make something like this. It was so... unexpected. I knew Jacob probably just wanted to have something in the nursery to remind the baby of him, but this seemed so much more than that. I looked down at the dream catcher in my hands and realized that this was La Push, Forks, me, Jacob, Charlie Renee _Phoenix_ all wrappe dinto one tangible object. I blinked back the tears that were blinding my vision and fought to keep my composure.

I looked up and saw Edward standing in the doorway.

"She did an amazing job," he said, looking around. "I saw bits of pieces of it in her thoughts, but this is just... remarkable." He smiled and walked over to me. He stopped suddenly with one look at my face.

"Are you crying?" he asked.

"No," I sniffed.

"Yes you are," he replied, looking down at the dream catcher in my hands. "Did Jacob make this?"

I simply nodded in response.

"Can I see?" he asked, kneeling down to my level.

I handed it to him, worried that he was going to break it. I pushed away that fear. Edward would never do something so callous.

"I should have made you something," he said. I knew from the tone in his voice that he felt like Jacob had outdone him.

"I didn't ask him to do this," I said. "It was unexpected."

Edward simply nodded. "I know. You never _ask _for anything."

"I don't deserve either one of you," I said, wiping my eyes with the back of my hand.

"You've got it wrong," Edward replied, shaking his head. "Neither one of _us _deserve_ you_."

I rolled my eyes.

Edward placed his cold hands on my belly, making me shiver.

"This little girl is going to be the luckiest baby in the world," he continued, "to have you for a mother."

I looked into Edward's eyes.

"How can you still think so much of me after I hurt you like that?" I asked him incredulously.

"Bella, I've hurt you before. But when two people love each other, when two people are married, they forgive and forget," he said. "If anything, what happened between us that night was my fault. I'm the one that asked Jacob to give you what I couldn't. That was _my _idea. And so everything that comes back from that comes back to me and is on my shoulders."

I shook my head.

"Bella, think back to our honeymoon. If I had behaved like a normal human, or if I had thought of every single thing that could have gone wrong, maybe I would have put on a condom or had Carlisle prescribe you some form of birth control -- "

"No," I said, interrupting him. "What happened has already happened and I wouldn't have changed it for the world. If I hadn't gotten pregnant with EJ, then I wouldn't have realized that I wanted to be a mother more than anything. If I hadn't gotten pregnant with EJ and lost him, then I wouldn't have Norah right now because I wouldn't have realized that this is the path that I wanted. It just took a little... figuring out. I cannot _wait _to have my daughter in my arms and if it wasn't for you who thought up this plan in the first place... if it wasn't for you who had insisted I do this, then Norah wouldn't even exist."

Edward just stared at me.

"For once, I'm speechless," he said, shaking his head.

I smiled at him, really smiled at him for the first time in two months.

"We can work things out, Bella," he said. "I know we can."

"Edward, what if this baby is a werewolf?" I asked. "What we spend the next fifteen years together and then the baby transforms?"

"Then we'll deal with it together," he replied stoicly.

"Edward, I don't know what path I want. I'm torn." I paused, unsure if what I was about to say would hurt him more than anything I'd ever said or done. "I can't see how this baby will work into the life that you and I always talked about having."

I saw the pain flash behind his eyes.

"We'll work it out," he promised. "We'll work it out."

He hugged me, but doubt plagued my thoughts, screaming at me, tearing at me.

"Jasper and I are going hunting," he said, straightening up. "I don't want him going alone..." he trailed off. "I'll be back later." He kissed me on the top of my head and then kissed my belly. In a flash, he disappeared, jetting out of the room.

I sighed, setting Jacob's letter aside and moving to Rosalie's, desperate to clear my head, to think of something else.

_Bella,  
I know you and I have never been best friends, to say the least. I also know that I've explained to you what happened to me and how I became what I am. I guess this is me extending an olive branch of sorts.  
I've noticed that you and Edward seem to be having... issues. I don't mean to interfere in anything that isn't my business, especially because I know Edward would be furious with me if he knew that I'd tried to. However, I would like you to know that I think you've finally chosen a decision that I would have... if I were human. I've always wanted to be a mother. Emmett and Edward are probably the only two people in the world that can really understand... Emmett because I've cried to him about it, Edward because he's always been privy to certain information I've wanted to keep to myself. Then again, he's not one to talk about things or badger me about it, so I've never really minded.  
Anyway, I can't even being to imagine how difficult things must be for you right now. I know that you and the werewolf are close friends and that he cares about you nearly as much as Edward does. I guess what I'm trying to say is that if you need anyone to talk to, don't hesitate to come to my room and talk to me. I know it sounds sort of silly, but I do feel kind of left out since you and Alice are so close and all.  
By the way, I hope you like the rocking chair. It was in my room for a time, but I re-upholstered it to match the baby's room. I love that name you picked out for her, too. Nora was my grandmother's name.  
Hope to hear from you soon.  
Love,  
Rose_

I re-folded Rosalie's letter and stuck it on top of the toy chest, sighing. Instead of getting less to worry about and less to think about, it seemed like things were just piling onto me. What did I do to deserve this?

* * *

_Another super-long chapter. :) I basically just described my dream nursery. :D Fun. Fun. Fun._

_At any rate, I hope you guys liked it. Please review!_

_Thanks for helping me hit 200 reviews! At presstime (*cough*I feel important using that big word*cough*), I had 215 reviews! LOVE YOU GUYS SO FREAKIN' MUCH! If I could give all of my reviewers a cookie, I so totally would. And I'd probably give those who just stuck my story on their alerts and didn't review a sucker, because I love you guys too... _

_Thanks for reading!  
xoxo  
_


	12. Sue's Gift

Chapter 12 – Sue's Gift

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Disclaimer: Once again, Jacob Black is nowhere near my vicinity. If you have any idea where he might be, let me know. :D

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I awoke at nine o'clock at night to find Bella sitting in the corner of my room, looking at me rather strangely. I watched her for a moment, through the darkness that accompanied early March nights. She was visibly upset.

"Bella?" I yawned. "What's wrong?"

"I drove here," she said, looking down at her knees.

"Obviously," I said, my voice still full of tiredness. I was slightly alarmed. "Why?"

"I've just got too much going on in my head," she confessed, sighing. "I needed to get away from the house for a bit and so I started driving around. This is where I ended up."

I nodded. "Is anything wrong?" I repeated.

"Yes and no," she said, shrugging. "Nothing's wrong in the sense that I can't really put my finger on exactly what's wrong."

I knew exactly what she meant. I also knew what she was thinking… what lay unspoken.

"Do you need to go on patrols tonight?" she asked me. "I can leave…"

Leaving was the last thing I wanted her to do.

"I'm sure Seth and Leah can do just fine without me tonight," I said hurriedly.

"It's just that it's nine o'clock at night and you're sleeping. You usually only do that when you have a late night ahead of you and – "

"I was tired after patrolling this morning. I just wanted to take a nap and I ended up sleeping for much longer than I intended," I lied. "Stay."

Bella nodded, her hands resting on her rather large belly.

"Edward had his hands right here," she said slowly, showing me exactly where his hands had been on her stomach. "It didn't feel right. I didn't tell him, but Norah shivered away from him. I felt her move away," she said softly, shaking her head in apparent disbelief.

"Norah?" I asked. _Maybe the baby realizes that the bloodsucker's a monster, _ I couldn't help but think.

"I decided to name her after someone in your family. I thought your grandmother's name was beautiful…" she said, speaking quickly now. "If you don't like it, you can suggest something else. I just thought – "

"It's perfect," I said, smiling. "I just didn't think you'd name her after my grandmother…" I trailed off.

"Norah Alice Black," she sighed.

"Black?" I said, frowning in confusion.

"Would you prefer Cullen? Alice said she saw a vision between me and Edward… after the baby was born and how we chose Black instead…"

I was quiet, trying to keep the emotion in my voice under control.

"I just didn't expect that, that's all," I said, gruffly.

Bella got up from the chair she'd been sitting on by the closet and made her way toward me through the darkness. She sat down next to me on the bed.

"Thank you for making the dream catcher," she said. "It's hanging above her crib, next to the window."

"Does it match the nursery?" I asked her.

"Well… not exactly," she replied. "The nursery is purple and white and light green with light green walls. The dream catcher is all sorts of different colors. But it's beautiful… it fits the room," she added. I wasn't sure if she was just saying that to make me feel better or not.

"Oh," I said.

"You said you needed to tell me something the next time we were together," she pressed. My mind immediately thought back to the note that I had written her that had accompanied the dream catcher.

"I need to put the baby's name on the dream catcher," I said.

"That's what you were going to tell me?" I sensed the disappointment in her voice.

"No, but I just thought of it," I replied.

She rolled her eyes.

"I was going to tell you that Seth is moving into Charlie's to live with him and Sue," I said.

"Does that have ramifications on the pack or something?" Bella asked cluelessly.

"Not really. Seth is fast enough to run here and make it in just a few minutes. He'll still spend the majority of his time here, but he'll go back to Forks to sleep. It's mostly just a place to put his stuff."

Bella nodded, but I could still tell she didn't get what I was saying.

"But won't Leah be all alone in that house?" she asked. "I mean, I know she's my age, but…"

"Sue asked Leah if she wanted to move into Charlie's with them and she said no. The Clearwaters had a little… shed, I guess you could call it, in the backyard. It's a little bigger than an actual _shed_… it's where Harry did his woodworking projects and where his gardening supplies were. Sue sold most of the stuff after Harry died. She had the thing completely remodeled and turned into a tiny house. It's got a kitchen, a bathroom, and a living area. Upstairs, there's a kind of loft-thing they added that had space enough for a bed."

"So wait, you're moving there?" Bella asked. "Jake, that's great!" she squealed.

"No," I said, shaking my head. She _still_ wasn't getting it. "Leah's moving there. I'm working with Sue to figure out how to buy the house with the money that was left to me when my mom died. Billy's helping me."

Bella's jaw dropped.

"You're buying a _house?_" she asked, shaking her head in disbelief.

"I'm buying a house," I repeated.

"That's… amazing! Wow, Jake! I'm so happy for you!" she said, hugging me.

"Yeah well, I'm going shopping for the nursery pretty soon. Emily's sister has Claire's old crib and changing table set that she's giving to me. I guess Sam and Emily are buying their own because she's not giving it to them. Leah's room is a pale green and it's right across from the master bedroom, so I guess that will be the nursery. Seth's' room is blue and I didn't think it'd be appropriate for a girl.

"Most of the furniture is going to be left behind. Leah's taking all of her things, but her place is too small for most of it and Charlie's house is already full. I don't think Sue wants to take too much of it because most of it just reminds her of Harry," I finished.

"So will you and Leah be neighbors or will it be like she's living on your property?" Bella asked.

I should have known that when I threw Leah into the mix that Bella would have said something about her.

"Sue is selling me half the land. The rest of it is just going to be Leah's," I replied. "It's about a half acre, I guess."

Bella nodded, she leaned back on the bed and turned on her side.

"I could just sleep here," she murmured.

I lay down next to her and put one hand on her belly. I could feel Norah moving ever so slightly against my hand. I wasn't sure how long we laid there, one of my hands on her belly, the other entwined in her dark brown hair.

"Bella, I love you," I murmured in her ear.

I didn't receive a response. Bella was already asleep, her chest rising up and down with every breath.

I watched her sleep, in awe of her every move, the way her face twisted as she dreamed. I wondered what she was dreaming about, whether it was a good or bad dream, and if, just maybe she was dreaming about –

"Jacob, _my_ Jacob…"

My jaw dropped and I was staring at her, watching, waiting for her to talk again, to say something more, to elaborate.

She didn't, but her words echoed in my thoughts, almost as if they were searing themselves into my brain.

* * *

I woke up the next morning to find Bella wrapped in my arms, sweat beading at her forehead. I immediately let her go and went and got a fan and put it in the room. As I was plugging it in, she woke up and sat up in the bed, her legs crossed under her.

"Is it just me or is it really hot in here?" she asked, yawning, a goofy grin on her face.

"It's just you," I said, smiling back.

"Wipe that silly smirk off your face," she said playfully.

"Smirk? What smirk?" I asked, innocently shrugging my shoulders.

"I'm so tired," she yawned again, ignoring my question.

"What, you didn't sleep well?" I asked.

"It's not too comfortable, sleeping with a space heater in the bed," she said, fanning herself dramatically.

"Better than sleeping with a life-sized human ice cube," I muttered.

She heard me.

"Jacob!" she exclaimed.

I just smiled at her. We headed out the door, into the kitchen. I pulled out a pan and started making breakfast.

"Good," a voice said at the door. "The two lovebirds are awake."

"Lovebirds?" Bella exclaimed, aghast.

"Huh," Billy said, wheeling himself into the kitchen and stopping at his usual place at the table. "You two sure looked cozy this morning."

Bella turned scarlet.

"We were just – I – er – well – " she stammered in embarrassment.

"I'm not asking," Billy said pointedly.

"Yeah," Bella said quickly, looking out the window.

"Bacon and eggs," I interrupted. "Biscuits?" I asked, pulling some out of a drawer in the refrigerator.

"Sure," Billy said, nodding. "Did Jacob tell you the good news?" he asked Bella.

"Yeah," Bella said, smiling brightly. "Last night! That's just fantastic!"

"I thought so. It's got a big backyard. Quil's father is putting up a fence this afternoon. Figured it'd be nice to have one for the kid, you know," he said, nodding toward Bella's stomach.

"That's nice of him," she said, smiling.

"That's just what we do around here. I was going to tell Jacob that I had Charlie ask Sue whether or not he could take you and go look at it. He hasn't seen it since I had him take Sue some eggs a few months ago."

"You're buying a house that you've never even really seen?" Bella asked me abruptly.

"It's one of the nicest houses on the reservation, Bella. I didn't think I needed to go inside and pry," I replied, shrugging.

"Why would I need to go with him to go look at a house?" she asked Billy.

"Well, I figured that since you and Jake decided that you were going to share custody of the baby, then you'd like to see where she's going to be spending a lot of her time."

"Oh," Bella said lamely. I wondered if she couldn't find a reason to counteract Billy's reason or if she really did want to go see the house.

"She's naming the baby after Granny," I said, cracking an egg in the skillet and tossing the shell into the trashcan next to me.

"Who decided that?" Billy asked suddenly.

"I did," Bella said. "I thought it was a beautiful name and I thought that it would be nice to name the baby after someone in Jacob's family. Her name will be Norah Alice Black."

"Not Cullen?" Billy scowled. "You're married to the bl —_Edward."_

"No, not Cullen," Bella said simply.

"What time is Quil starting the fence?" I asked Billy, turning the bacon over in the skillet.

"I think around noon," Billy said. "Maybe a little earlier. Old Quil said it'd be an all-day project."

"That really _is_ nice of them," I said, appreciating the fact that someone on the reservation was actually acknowledging the fact that I was going to become a father in a few weeks' time.

"You should go and pick up some things for the baby. I'm sure Bella will be able to tell you exactly what you'll need for the nursery," Billy suggested.

I saw exactly what Billy was doing. He was trying to fill up our day so that we could be together. I didn't know if he was doing it for me or for Norah, but I was grateful.

"Yeah," Bella said. "I'll call Edward and let him know that I'm out shopping for the baby. He won't care."

I opened the oven to check on the biscuits. Nearly done.

"So when are you due again?" Billy asked. "Jacob hasn't really been able to tell me much about anything, no matter what I've asked him. Everyone on the reservation is so excited. Sam and Emily's baby shower was last weekend. Everyone kept asking me when Jacob's baby was due and all I could tell them was that it was a girl. Sam and Emily are having a boy. Levi Joshua Uley… after Sam's grandfather."

Bella smiled. "Well, at least Norah here will have a playmate," she said, resting one hand on her belly. "I'm due on May seventeenth."

"Have you and Edward decided when you're going to throw a baby shower?" Billy asked. "It's getting kind of close, don't you think?"

"We're not," Bella replied. "I hate parties. I'm kinda like my dad with that sort of thing. We just bought everything for the nursery. It's already done and waiting."

"Well, if you're not having a baby shower, then you should come to the one we're having," Billy said. "I'm guessing around the first of the month should be appropriate… provided that little one stays in there for that long."

I knew Billy was trying to get Bella involved in life on the reservation, but this was a bit much.

"Dad, we don't _need_ a baby shower, do we?" I asked painfully. "I really don't feel comfortable with throwing one. That's sort of a… woman's thing, isn't it?"

"The entire reservation wants you to throw a baby shower, so you'll do what they want. It's not like this is something to _hide_," Billy said. "If it makes it any better, we can make it a baby shower/housewarming party."

"Doubly worse," I muttered. "Dad, the house has everything it could possibly need!"

"You're throwing a party and that's the end of the discussion," Billy said. By the tone of his voice, I knew the topic wasn't up for discussion. I groaned.

"I can help," Bella said. "Maybe if I throw the party, then you won't feel so out of place," she offered. "Besides, getting to know the people on the reservation would be kind of nice. I've already met Sam and Emily and Quil and Embry and everybody and I know Seth pretty well."

"Fine," I said, pulling the biscuits out of the oven. I turned the stove off and slid the eggs and bacon into huge bowls and sat them in the middle of the table. I turned to put the biscuits on a plate.

"Pick up invitations while you're out, then," Billy said. "I'll probably go over to the house and keep Old Quil company."

Bella came over and pulled out the plates from the cabinet and started setting the table for me.

"Thanks," I said, smiling at her.

"No problem," she replied. "Billy, Jacob, what do you guys want to drink?" she asked.

"Tea," Billy said. "And help yourself to whatever you want, sweetheart," he replied. I sighed. Billy could be quite the sap sometimes.'

"Pepsi," I told her, bringing the biscuits over and setting them in the middle of the table.

Right at noon, Bella and I headed over to the Clearwater's old house down the street. Quil was standing outside his grandfather's truck as we walked up.

"Hey Jake, Bella," he said.

As Bella cleared the truck bed and passed him, Quil turned full around and gaped at her belly.

"Damn, Bella," he said, his eyes wide. "I knew you were pregnant, but I didn't know you were _that_ pregnant."

"I'll take that as a compliment," she said hesitantly. "I'll be seven months next week."

"Congratulations," Quil said, pulling his grandfather's toolbox out of the truck bed. "That's just crazy though. I mean, Jake, you're only seventeen and you're going to be a dad."

I wasn't sure what to say to that. I just bit my tongue and kept my mouth shut.

"Thanks," Bella replied, ignoring Quil's comment about my age. She looked over at me and gazed at the house.

"So this is it?" she asked, placing her hands at the small of her back and nodding toward it.

"Yeah," I said, trying to keep the pride in my voice at a minimum. "This is it."

"It's really pretty, she said, heading up the walk toward the porch. "I love the porch swing," she grinned, nodding toward the white swing hanging next to the front door.'

"Yeah," I said. "Harry and Sue used to sit there and yell at everyone as they walked past. In a loving way, of course."

I opened up the front door and Bella gasped. The best thing about the house was that it was so light and airy… open.

"It's beautiful!" she said, looking around.

"Like I said, it's one of the best houses on the reservation. Right before Harry retired, he had the entire house remodeled." We walked into the kitchen. Oak cabinets, granite countertops, new appliances… I knew I'd have a lot of fun cooking there. "I don't really want to go into their bedrooms," I told Bella. "That's still their private stuff."

"Jake?" a voice called from the hallway.

Leah was standing outside her bedroom, her arms folding across her chest.

"Yeah?" I asked.

"I didn't know you were coming by," she said. "You should have called and I would have had the place a little more straightened up."

"It's clean," I said dismissively.

Bella walked over and waved to Leah.

"Oh, hi," Leah replied. "I didn't realize Jake had brought company."

"Didn't you say you wanted to use Leah's room for the nursery?" Bella asked, placing one hand on her belly.

I saw Leah's eyes narrow ever so slightly.

"Yeah," I admitted. "Leah's new place is really amazing though," I told Bella. "If the baby weren't coming, I probably would have just asked to move there myself."

Bella looked out the window toward the little house in the backyard. "Yeah," she said. "You can't even tell that it used to be a shed."

"I had the walls painted a bright blood red," Leah said. "It's a lot more my style," she quipped.

I could feel the tension in the room.

"If you guys want to come see my room, you can. I know you need to get planning for the nursery. That baby looks like it'd be ready to come out any day now," Leah said.

"I'm not even seven months," Bella growled.

"Yeah," I said loudly, trying to smooth things over. "That'd be great! Thanks, Leah!"

"No problem," Leah said. "I'll just be… in the backyard," she said quickly, backing up toward the French doors in the kitchen.

Bella and I headed into Leah's room. Like Seth had said, the walls were a pale green. The perfect shade. Her bed was in one corner, her desk in another. I knew she'd be taking most of this stuff with her when she moved into the little house. We'd already agreed that she would take the loveseat in the living room, but the couch would stay. A big window was on the outside wall.

"Well, obviously, you would want to put the crib on this wall," Bella said, pointing to the wall where Leah's desk was. "And the changing table on the wall closer to the closet," she added. "Maybe you could get a rocking chair to put by the window… and then the three of us could get our picture taken and put it on the wall above the changing table."

I nodded. "That sounds nice," I said.

"Alice had Norah's name painted on the wall above her crib," she said. "Maybe you can get wooden letters or something to put somewhere and have her name in the room."

"Or I could just have Billy do it. He's really artistic," I said. "It'd have to be somewhere he could reach though," I added. "Maybe on the wall across from the light switch."

"Yeah," Bella said. She paused for a second. "Let's go see the backyard," she said suddenly, pulling me out of the room. We walked through the French doors, past Leah rummaging through the refrigerator, and out onto the back deck. Quil was standing in the backyard next to his father and grandfather. They were in a circle surrounding a huge pile of two by fours. They had already started part of the fence closest to the house.

"Hey Old Quil, Quil, Quil," I greeted them, nodding to each one. As always, I felt like I was saying the same name over and over again, three times. All three of them looked the same, just different ages.

"Jake," Old Quil nodded. "Bella."

"He remembers my name?" Bella muttered.

"Yep," I said. "Who'd forget you? Why, you're the infamous Bella!" I turned to address the 'Quils.' "We just stopped by to see the house. And I was going to thank you guys for building the fence. I really appreciate it."

"No problem," the middle Quil said. "Glad to do something for you guys. Just think of it as our gift for the baby… we're giving it to you a bit early… before the shower."

"Yeah," I said. "The shower… it's on April third if you want to come. There'll be food, especially if Emily comes," I laughed. Emily couldn't show up to a family function without bringing food… everyone knew that.

"Well, I don't know about that," Quil said. "Isn't she due pretty soon?"

"Next week," Old Quil said. "She hasn't left the house in a while. Sam's afraid to let her out of his sight. First babies," he added with a sigh.

"Yeah," Bella said. "It'll be a good thing that Norah will have someone to play with," she said, smiling at the three of them.

"We've got to be going," I said. "We're supposed to pick up some stuff for the nursery and then I've got a ton of invitations to address. I guess I'll see you guys at the shower?" I asked.

"You bet," Old Quil said with a wolfish grin.

I took Bella's hand and we headed back to Billy's.

"You know, I can always help you address those invitations," she said, smiling at me. "After all, we are throwing this party together, aren't we?"

I just laughed. For us to be doing anything together was good. I was sort of looking forward to the shower, as long as Bella was going to be there.

* * *

_Another chapter done. Hope you guys enjoyed! I've got some exciting things planned for the next few chapters. I'm trying not to get too caught up and going crazy and ending the story too soon! lol..._

_Anyway, please review! I love getting input. You have no idea how often my reviewers have saved me from writer's block or suggested things I've actually added to the story, even if I've already written it. ;)_

_Thanks for reading!  
xoxo_


	13. Levi Joshua

Chapter 13 – Levi Joshua

* * *

Disclaimer: Jacob Black does not belong to me. If he did, I probably wouldn't be writing this story. We'd be writing our own story in real life.

* * *

I woke up to Billy's ecstatic screaming at seven in the morning the following Wednesday. I blearily walked into the living room to find Billy on the phone.

"How are they?" he was asking.

I turned the coffee pot on. It was much too early to be awake… especially when I'd only gotten two hours of sleep the night before.

"That's great!" Billy exclaimed.

I looked up at him in confusion. How was who? What was so great?

"Well, tell them we'll be down there this afternoon," Billy replied. "Uh, okay. I'll make sure Jacob brings her. Thanks, Sam," he said, putting the phone back down on the receiver.

"Emily had the baby last night," he said, smiling at me. "She wants you to bring Bella and come and see the baby."

"Good morning to you too, Dad," I said, still trying to wake up.

"It's a great morning," he said, wheeling himself over to the kitchen table.

I got started on breakfast, paying careful attention to not burn the house down in my sleepy haze.

* * *

Bella came over around one o'clock. I had made sure I'd had a nap before she came. I'd also taken the opportunity to put on some actual clothes… one of my nicer white t-shirts and a pair of dark jeans… my only pair that I saved for when I actually went places.

"Wow, you actually look nice today," Bella said, climbing out of her Mercedes.

"What, I don't look nice any other day?" I asked her, feigning to be hurt by her comment.

"It's not that," she said. "It's just… I'm not used to seeing you in regular clothes. I'm too used to seeing you in sweatpants and no shoes and no shirt."

I laughed.

"I actually save nice clothes for when I go places," I said, placing my hands on my hips.

Bella nodded.

"So are we taking the Rabbit or do you want me to drive?" she asked.

Billy wheeled himself out of the house and down the ramp on the side of the house.

"Bella should drive," he said, eyeing her Mercedes. "Is there enough room for my chair in the trunk?"

"Yeah," Bella said. "Do you want to go ahead and leave?" she asked him.

"Yeah," Billy replied. "We should probably pick up a card or something," he added as a second thought. "I gave them a gift at the shower already."

"Alright," Bella said. "We can stop by a grocery store or something on the way there."

"Sounds good."

I walked over to help Billy into the car and then put his wheelchair in the trunk. I sat next to Bella in the passenger-side seat.

"So how are Sam and Emily and the baby?" Bella asked.

"They're fine, from what Sam told me," Billy remarked. "He said she had a really quick delivery."

"That's great," Bella replied warmly. "I hope I'm that lucky."

"Emily wanted you to come and see the baby," I said. "I'm not really sure why."

"Well, they'll be the two youngest kids on the reservation," Billy reasoned. "And who knows? Maybe they'll end up together one day."

"Uh, uh… Billy, don't go matchmaking with my daughter before she's even born!" Bella said teasingly.

"Wouldn't dream of it," Billy replied, grinning at her.

* * *

We arrived at the hospital around two. We walked around labor and delivery for a good two minutes until Bella spotted Sam on the opposite side of the hallway in a room. She nudged me and then nodded toward him.

"Sam?" I asked.

He looked up and smiled at me. "Hey, Jake," he said. "Billy, Bella," he nodded toward them. "Come on in."

Emily was lying in the hospital bed in one corner of the room, attached to all sorts of machines and monitors. A tiny baby lay in her arms.

"Hi you guys," Emily said, smiling up at us.

"So this is the littlest Quileute," Billy said, grinning at her. He handed Sam the card that we had bought at the gas station down the road and signed. Sam thanked him before opening it.

"Not for long," Emily said, smiling at us. She nodded toward Bella. Do you want to hold him?" she asked her.

"I – umn – should I?" she asked weakly.

"You should get some practice," she said. "Have you even held a baby before?"

"No," Bella admitted. "My parents were only children, both of them. They didn't have any brothers or sisters… I don't have any cousins or anything," she said quietly.

"Come on over here and sit down," Emily said, indicating the chair next to her.

Bella obliged Emily's request and walked over and sat down in the chair next to the bed. Emily sat up and placed the tiny baby in Bella's arms.

"Hi, baby," Bella murmured to the newborn. She placed one finger near the baby's tiny hand. He grabbed it, holding on tightly.

"He's beautiful, Sam, Emily," she said, not tearing her eyes away from the baby. Her eyes were filled with wonder and awe.

"Levi Joshua," Emily said. "That's his name."

"He looks like a Levi," Billy said. "Just as pretty as what you were when you were born, son," he said to Sam.

Sam grinned.

"Maybe you'll be lucky like I was," Emily told Bella. "I woke up at three in the morning and we drove here and they admitted me. When they finally got around to checking me, I was already seven centimeters. Little Levi was born at 6:17 am this morning."

"Wow," Bella said, looking back at her. "I hope I'm that lucky."

"Are you going to a hospital to deliver?" Emily asked. "I mean, I know you live with Dr. Cullen…"

"We haven't really talked about it," Bella said. "We still have a lot of things to discuss."

"You'll be fine," Emily reassured her. "You're good with him," she added, nodding toward her son.

"I've only held him for all of two minutes," Bella laughed.

I watched the scene in silence. I could tell that both Sam and Billy were watching me from out of the corner of my eye, but neither said a word. I was too immersed in the scene before me to even care about anything else. Bella's tenderness, the way she cradled the tiny baby in her arms… that's all I could think about. I couldn't stop thinking about _our_ baby and how it would be when she finally arrived. I wanted to have this scene unfold before me every day for the rest of my life.

Bella finally looked up at me and smiled.

"I can't believe we're going to be parents in just a few weeks," she said, shaking her head in disbelief. "it hasn't really felt _real_ until now," she told Emily.

"I know," Emily said. "I don't think it'll hit me that he's actually here until we get home. Do you want to hold him, Jacob?" she asked me suddenly.

"I – I really don't think that's a good idea. I – I might drop him," I said, stammering.

"Nonsense," Emily replied, rolling her eyes. "Come on."

"Jacob here has really grown up in the past few months," Billy said. "Did you know he's buying the Clearwaters' old house?"

"Isn't Leah moving into the refurbished shed out back?" Sam asked.

"They turned it into a loft," Billy answered. "It's pretty nice from what Old Quil told me."

"Come on, Jake," Bella said, a soft smile playing about her lips. "Please? You can sit here. I haven't dropped him yet."

I shook my head and sighed. I walked over to Bella and looked down at the baby.

Emily smiled at me. "Just for a second, Jacob," she said, her voice slightly pleading. "If I'm not mistaken, you've never held a baby before, either. Aren't Collin and Brady the youngest kids on the reservation? I mean, besides Levi here."

"Fine," I said, giving in. Bella grinned and got up. I took her place next to Emily. She leaned over and sat the baby in my arms.

"How much did he weigh?" Billy asked Emily.

"Eight pounds, twelve ounces," she replied. "He's not exactly a small thing," she laughed.

"He's still small," I said, looking down at the baby. Miraculously, he was sleeping through the entire conversation, through being passed back and forth amongst complete strangers. I could already tell that he looked a lot like Sam, but something about Emily was present in his high cheek bones and deep-set eyes.

I thought of Sam and Emily and how they were going to have a life together with their son. I knew I wanted Bella to choose me instead of Edward. But it didn't exactly feel so… _real_, as she had said, until this moment… until I had had a glimpse of what was coming.

"Norah's kicking up a storm," Bella commented, placing one hand on her belly.

"Norah?" Sam asked, frowning. "You're naming her after Jacob's grandmother?"

Bella nodded. "I decided to pick someone from the tribe… someone related to Jacob… a name to pass on," she explained for what felt like the millionth time.

"Levi and Norah," Emily said, smiling and looking at her son in my arms. " I think they'll be good friends," she said.

"Please don't start the matchmaking just yet," Bella laughed.

"I've already told Sam the same thing," Emily joined her in laughter. "How far along are you?" she asked her.

"A little over seven months," Bella replied.

"Feeling huge yet?" she asked, laughing.

"Oh, yes," Bella said, shaking her head. "I'm about ready to just have this baby and get it over with. She's beating me from the inside out already."

"Alright," Billy said abruptly, heading off the pregnancy banter that was about to ensue. "I think we should probably get going and let you three get to know each other a little better. I'm getting kinda tired."

I got up and handed Levi back to Emily. Sam came over and wrapped me in a one-arm hug.

"Congrats, man," I told him.

"The same to you," he said, grinning. "Let us know when Norah there decides to make her appearance."

"I will," Bella said. "Thanks for inviting me along."

"Don't mention it," Emily said. She picked up her son's tiny hand and waved to Bella's belly.

"Levi says 'Bye, Norah!'" she laughed.

Bella shook her head, laughing. _Women_, I thought, smiling. Billy and I followed her out the door, joining her in laughter.

* * *

We dropped Billy off at the house. He headed into his bedroom to take a nap. Bella and I sat in the Mercedes in silence. The entire trip back from the hospital, Bella and I hadn't spoken a word to one another. Billy had been the only one initiating conversation.

"You're thinking about something," I said, not looking at her.

"Yes," she replied, looking down at the steering wheel. "You're right. I am. I've got a lot on my mind."

"Care to open up?" I asked her.

"Norah's going to be here in six weeks," Bella said, looking at me.

"Six weeks?" I asked in shock. It seemed so soon.

"Yes, six weeks. We've got a lot to do in a very short amount of time. I mean, I could even have her early…"

I nodded. "I know," I replied.

"Things are ready for her at home, but here, they're just… _not_. And I guess it was me thinking, holding Sam and Emily's baby in my arms… I need things to be ready. I need them to be ready _now_." She placed her hands on her belly and sighed.

"Maybe this is just some pregnancy instinct that's got you worrying," I reasoned, frowning. "Things are going to be ready before the baby gets here. Leah's moving next weekend. The baby shower is this weekend. There's a lot of stuff that's about to happen here," I said, trying to relieve her fears. "You'll see. Are you going to come to the shower this weekend?"

Bella nodded silently. "Of course. I already promised Billy that I'd be there. It's just that I'm making so much effort to get to know the people on the reservation… and don't take this personally, but I don't feel like things are happening very quickly here. I mean, I know you got a house and everything, but it's not even ready for the baby yet and – "

"Bella," I said slowly. "I think you're over-reacting. Next Sunday, I'm setting the nursery up. If you're really that worried about everything, then you can come over then and oversee the setting up of the nursery. You were with me last weekend when I bought everything for it. You basically know nearly everything that's going to be in it!"

"No, I don't!" Bella insisted. "You didn't buy a crib or a changing table or a mattress or bedding or – "

"_Bella!"_ I interrupted her. "I already told you that Emily's sister is giving me most of that stuff Saturday at the baby shower! And Emily had a boy and Emily's sister needs to get rid of most of her girl stuff. Things will be _fine_," I said reassuringly, or what I thought was reassuringly at any rate. "Stop freaking out!"

"Oh, so that's what I'm doing?" Bella said exaggeratedly. "I'm so sorry that you have things under control, Mister Seventeen-Year-Old-Daddy-to-Be! If you have things figured out right now, then by all means, tell me how to make things work! Tell me how to alleviate my swollen ankles, my always too full bladder, my back pain and the constant kicking in my ribcage when I'm trying to sleep at night! Tell me, Oh Wise Alpha!"

"I didn't mean it like that!" I said, realizing that once again, I'd said the wrong thing.

"You know what, Jacob? I'll see you at the shower on Saturday. Get out of my car!" she exclaimed.

"Bella, I didn't – "

"I said, get out of my car!" she yelled.

"Bella – "

"GET OUT OF MY FUCKING CAR!" Bella screamed at the top of her lungs. Her face was bright red now. Not with embarrassment, as usual, but fury.

"Fine," I said softly. I stopped, my hand on the door, looking back at her sorrowfully. "What do I look like? The Wizard of Oz? You need a brain? You need a heart? Go ahead. Take mine. Take everything I have." And with that as my final word, I got out of the car. I thought I saw a flicker of remorse in Bella's eyes before she spun out of the driveway. Maybe I had imagined it. She was headed back to Forks. Back to Edward. What in the world would I have to do in order to make her happy? I had no clue.

* * *

The baby shower went off without a hitch the following Saturday. Sam and Emily weren't there, of course, but everyone else on the reservation had showed up. A table in the living room was overflowing with presents and packages and the kitchen was full of food. Emily had baked a bunch of cookies and sent them over with Embry. I didn't see how she had managed to bake four dozen cookies the day after come home from the hospital with a baby, but that was Emily for you.

The shower was scheduled to go off at two o'clock. It was nearly half past two and Bella still hadn't shown up. Sue and Charlie walked in the door, a large package under Charlie's arm. Bella wasn't with them.

Quil kept telling me that she wouldn't just _not_ show up.

"That's just not like Bella," he said. "You've known her for a long time now. You should realize that."

"Qwil! Qwil! Wook!" Claire yelled at him. "Wook what I gots!" she crowed. "For da baby!"

"Shush, Claire," Quil told her, kneeling down on her level. "You can't show the baby's daddy what you've got for the baby until everyone starts unwrapping presents, okay?" he told her patiently.

I smiled at them, trying not to laugh.

"Late to her own baby shower," Leah tutted in my ear.

"She'll be here," I snapped. "She wouldn't do that."

"Did you two get into a fight or something?" she asked me.

"Not exactly," I said. "She's just a hormonal mess right now."

Leah nodded.

"Charlie?" I asked, trying to get Leah off my tail. I ran over to him. "Have you seen Bella?" I asked.

"Bella? She's not here?" he asked, frowning.

"No," I said. "I haven't seen her."

"That's weird," Charlie said. "I talked to her this morning. She sounded a little upset, but she said she'd be here."

"I hope she shows up. I really don't want to open a bunch of pink presnts with baby items in them," I groaned.

Charlie smiled at me apathetically.

"It'll be alright," he said.

I looked out the window fruitlessly.

"Where is she?" I wondered aloud. What if she had gotten in a car accident? What if she was hurt? How was I supposed to know where she was at? Oh wait. That's because I wasn't her keeper. I was just Jake. Just the baby's father. Not anything else. Not what I wanted to be.

I headed out to the backyard where Seth was helping Old Quil grill hot dogs and hamburgers on the grill.

"Where's who?" Seth asked.

"The pregnant one. Bella," I said, rolling my eyes.

"What? That's not you?" he asked sarcastically.

I leaned closer to him. "I'd be a little nicer to me if you want to keep all for of your legs, pup," I growled. "Or I might just throw a pine cone at you," I said, looking down at the basket next to the door that was filled with them.

"Lighten up, Jake," Old Quil said. "Pregnant women are slow. She'll be here if she said she was going to be here."

"Who are you talking about?" a voice at the door asked.

* * *

_Yeah, so a mild cliffhanger. I figured that this story hadn't had any so far, so I'd leave one. Please remember to review or comment or something. I'd like to know your opinions!_

_Thanks for reading!  
xoxo _


	14. Jacob's Baby Shower

Chapter 14 -- Jacob's Baby Shower

* * *

Disclaimer: I do not own Jacob Black. However, I do own this story... and the dreams of Jacob that run idly through my head when I'm not really thinking of anything else.

* * *

I was standing in the doorway, looking out at Jacob and the mass of people that were obviously waiting around for my arrival. I really didn't want to discuss the real reason I was late. Of course, Edward and I had gotten into another argument.

_"So you're going to let Jacob throw you a baby shower, when you refused to let us throw you one?" Edward asked angrily._

_"Billy wanted to throw one and Jacob didn't want to have to open up a bunch of pink gifts. Can you blame him?" I had asked._

_"Yeah, I bet that's exactly what it was!" Edward huffed._

_"Why are you always so jealous of Jacob?" I exclaimed. "I married _you_ remember? Not Jacob!"_

_"Yeah," Edward growled. "But it's obvious that you're in love with him and not me. You're the one that called out for _him_ when we were supposed to be making love!"_

_"That was an accident!" I said, aghast. "Why are you still bringing that up? I thought you said that you were going to forgive me and that we were going to try to work things out?"_

_"Working things out meant that you were going to at least spend some time at home with me. Not spending every waking hour in La Push with Jacob!" Edward complained._

_"I haven't spent every waking hour in La Push! I've gone over there like twice in the last week and a half," I defended myself. "Jacob is the father of this child. He deserves to spend some time with me so we can figure out how things are going to work!"_

_"So how many times have you slept with him since the baby was conceived?" Edward spat. "I just want to La Push him off a cliff!" he fumed._

_I didn't answer him. I didn't trust myself to speak. I just walked out the door and climbed into the Mercedes and headed to La Push. I was already running late._

"Bella?" Jacob asked, frowning. "You're late." He was standing next to Seth and Old Quil by the grill in the backyard.

"I know," I said. "I'm sorry. I just got tied up in things at home..." I trailed off. "It's fine."

"Edward?" Jacob asked intuitively.

"No," I lied. "Just stuff..."

"Okay," Jacob said. I could tell he knew that I wasn't telling the truth. "Are you hungry? There's food in the kitchen and stuff..." I stepped in front of him, cutting him off.

"Can we talk?" I heard myself ask suddenly. I felt like I was falling apart at the seams... like I was falling off of a cliff, falling through the air, and there was no one to catch me and pull me back up and put me back on my feet again... no one except Jacob Black. I needed him.

"Bella, are you okay?" Jacob asked me again. "You don't look like you feel so good..."

"Can we just talk?" I asked him again. "Is there somewhere in the house that isn't being... occupied?"

"Wait here," Jacob instructed me. I watched him walk back into the house. I stepped into the kitchen and watched him walk into the living room.

"Sue?" he called. I heard the distinct murmuring o fhis voice and knew he must have been talking to Sue about something or another. A few seconds later, he came back into the kitchen and took my hand. He led me back to the back of the house, into Sue's bedroom.

He sat me down on the bed and sat down next to me.

"What's wrong, Bella?" he asked.

"Everything," I said quietly, trying to blink back tears. I found myself explaining the argument that Edward and I had had that morning.

"That's stupid bloodsucker!" Jacob swore, regurgitating a load of expletives. I could feel him shuddering next to me.

"Jacob, please calm down," I pleaded with him. "Please? That's really the _last_ thing I need right now."

The sound of my voice must have helped him calm down because the shuddering eventually came to an end and he cleared his throat before turning to look me in the eyes again.

"Sorry," he replied, shaking his head. He sighed.

"I've tried to work things out with Edward," I told him. "I really have. I don't know what else to do!" I cried. "He should have known before he brought up this whole plan that it was just going to ensure that you'd have a greater role in my life. I know he's just trying to protect me, but this is getting ridiculous."

"It's going to be okay," Jacob told me, wrapping his left arm around my shoulders. I rested my head on his shoulder and sighed.

"How is it going to be okay?" I asked him. "Edward's going to end up making me choose between you and him. His jealousy is becoming too much for me to handle," I cried, blinking back tears. "I owe it to him as my husband to be there for him and to work things out with him, but I owe a lot to you because you're my baby's father," I said, desperately trying to figure things out. I was on the verge of breaking down.

"Edward is being stupid," Jacob said flatly. "I'm not saying that because I want you to choose me in the end I'm saying it because it's true. He's asking you to be in two places at once and that's not possible."

I knew Jacob was right. I just didn't know what to do about it.

"Bella, honey, I told you a long time ago that I wasn't going to keep ripping you in half. Whatever you choose is up to you. But I'm always going to be here for you and for Norah... whatever the two of you need from me. You're always going to have my heart, whether you want it or not."

I felt like my heart was tearing in half. Suddenly, I found my lips on Jacob's, kissing him, _really _kissing him, the sensation of my lips on his mingling with the baby, _his baby_ kicking in my belly. His hands rested on my belly and Norah kicked with a frequency she only did when Jacob was near. As I pulled away from him, he wiped away the tears trailing down my cheeks away with his fingertips. He smiled at me reassuringly.

"I love you, Jacob," I told him, hugging him, burying my tear-stained face into his shoulder. I knew I did. I knew it had been a long time coming, but I had been too stupid, too stubborn to realize it.

"I know," Jacob whispered, comforting me. "But that's not enough, is it?"

"I don't know," I replied, being honest with him and myself for once.

A soft knock at the door interrupted us. It was Sue.

"Honey, people are wondering where the expectant mother is," she said warmly.

I sniffed back tears and Jacob hugged me tightly once more. Sue came over and handed me a tissue. "You look beautiful," she said. "Smile."

I couldn't help but laugh. She hugged me and Jacob wipped away the last of my tears before leading me out into the living room that was now packed with lawn chairs with lots of people in them. The two couches were pushed up agains the wall. A living chair was in the corner of the room and Jacob led me over to it and sat down next to me on a lawn chair.

"Thanks for coming you guys," he said. "We really appreciate it."

A chorus of yeses and mutual agreement followed.

"It's a beautiful name you've picked for her," Embry's mother said, smiling at me. Coming from a woman who had named her son after a soap opera star, I wasn't sure if I should take that as a compliment or not. Jacob caught my eye and I knew he was thinking the exact same thing.

"Thank you," I said hesitantly.

"Is the middle name after someone as well?" Emily's sister, Heather, asked.

"Umn, yeah," I replied. "My good friend Alice. We're really close."

Sue handed me a present. The tag said, 'To: Bells. From: Your Good Ol' Dad and Sue.' I couldn't help but smile. Trust Charlie to make the best out of nearly any situation. My dad sure did know me through and through.

I unwrapped their gift to find a bouncy seat in an eggshell color, Norah's name embroidered on the top of the seat in a forest green.

"Jacob picked out the theme and everyone tried to find things to match it," Sue said "I thought it was really cute. I embroidered her name on the top of it."

"Thanks," I said, smiling, still uncomfortable with everyone's eyes on me.

I continued to open gift after gift: a mobile with blue birds and robins hanging from it, a receiving blanket set in red, orange, green, and yellow, several sets of bottles, a beautiful _bassinette_ with a yellow bumblebee pattern...

After I had all of the gifts open and had graciously thanked everyone, Jacob handed me another gift, this one out of his pocket.

"Jacob..." I said, noticing this gift was rather small and boxy.

He leaned in toward me and smiled nervously. I could feel my heart pitter-pattering rather quickly.

"I just want to thank you for doing this for me," he said, resting his hand on my belly. He leaned down and kissed it, soliciting "awws" from the shower guests. He sat down in front of me as I opened the box. I didn't have the heart to remind him that my original motive behind Norah's conception hadn't been for him at all, but for myself.

Resting inside the box was a necklace with a silver charm on it... a heart with a garnet, a sapphire, and an emerald on one side and the letters J, B, and N on the other. I stared at in in shock and awe.

"It's beautiful," I whispered. "Jake, you didn't have to do this," I murmured, knowing the necklace must have cost a fortune.

"I did it because I wanted to," Jacob replied.

"You still need to see the nursery," Heather piped up from one corner.

"I -- I do," I said, grateful for the distraction. Jacob took my hand and led me into Leah's old bedroom, into our daughter's nursery.

"I thought Leah wasn't moving out until next weekend?" I asked him, confused.

"She moved out yesterday," Jacob said. "Heather came in from out of town with the girls and her husband and they brought the furniture for the nursery with them. There was nowhere to put it all, so Leah agreed to go ahead and move out before the shower."

"That was nice of her," I replied. Jacob had orchestrated the building of the nursery _and_ Leah's move-out in less than three days? I was shocked.

We walked into the nursery and I gasped. The room didn't look the same anymore. Large trees were painted on one wall and the Pacific Ocean was painted on the other. The sun was painted above the closet and the carpet was the color of sand. Norah's name was in block letters above the window. The entire room was reminiscent of La Push. The crib was a cherry wood; the changing table matched it. The eggshell upholstered cherry wood rocking chair completed the room. I didn't want to leave. I was in shock, but in a good way. The nursery felt like home... how I'd always imagined my home to be. I loved it. It was the most beautiful thing I'd ever seen.

"You like it?" Jacob breathed in my ear.

"Uh, yeah!" I gasped. I walked a bit further into the room. The closet was open and stocked with clothes and everything. Everything Norah could ever need. Above the crib hung a dream catcher identical to the one Jacob had made me.

"Heather brought over some clothes that were her daughters when they were really small... enough to just get us started, plus the things that people brought for the baby already," he said, nodding toward the closet.

I turned around and hugged him tightly, feeling guilty about what I had said in the car earlier in the week. Jacob had been right. Things _were_ ready. What had I been thinking?

"I told you things would be ready by this weekend," he said, reading my thoughts.

"I'm so sorry," I told him, blinking back tears.

"Bella, you're going to have to stop crying," Jacob laughed. He started wiping away my tears again.

"I can't help it!" I exclaimed. "This is just too much. And I was so mean to you last time we talked... I don't deserve you to be this nice to me. You should be furious with me and -- "

"Still have that box?" he asked, cutting me off.

"Yeah," I said, showing it to him.

He took the box from me and pulled the necklace out. He walked behind me and put it on my neck.

"There," he said, grinning.

I turned around and found myself kissing him again, wrapping my arms around his neck and letting the box fall to the floor. Quil walked by and wolf-whistled.

"Damn, you know sucking face like that can make you go into labor," he said.

I jumped about a foot into the air. _Shit._

"Keep your mouth shut or you'll be walking with three legs," Jacob growled.

"No need to threaten anyone, Jacob!" I admonished him.

"It's not like I was going to go to the bloodsucker's lair and tell them," Quil said, rolling his eyes. "It burns too bad."

"Good," Jacob said, smirking.

My stomach growled impatiently.

"You should eat something," he said, placing one warm hand against my belly. "You need to feed our baby."

"I should," I agreed. "Let me thank Heather for the nursery things first though."

"Already did," Jacob replied. "It's more a gift for me than for you, no offense. Just I'll be the one really using it for the baby. You've got a nursery back at the vamp -- I mean, at your place."

"Oh," I said. For some reason, I kept forgetting that fact and I really didn't like it too much.

I walked into the kitchen. Sue and Charlie were at the kitchen table, eating.

"Did you like the nursery?" Charlie asked me.

"It's gorgeous!" I said. "Norah's going to love it!"

"Too bad you won't be around much to use it," Sue said, sighing. "But then again, I'm sure you and Edward have a beautiful nursery."

"We do," I agreed, ignoring the sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach. I made a plate and sat down and started eating.

"That's a gorgeous necklace that Jacob bought you," Sue said, nodding toward the charm on my neck.

"It is," I agreed. "I thanked him for it earlier."

"So what is the baby going to call your dear old dad?" Charlie asked.

"I figured Grandpa Charlie," I reasoned. "And Grandpa Billy and Grandpa Carlisle..." I added, thinking of Billy and Carlisle.

"Hmph, Grandpa," Charlie said. "Makes me feel old."

"You're not old," I laughed.

"I was thinking I could go by 'Pops,'" Billy said, roling himself into the kitchen.

"I like that," Jacob said. "Pops Billy," he laughed.

I just shook my head. "Whatever you want to go by, you can. Just as long as it's not something completely out there... I don't want to hasve to refer to my father as 'Goody' or 'Pappy.'"

"Hmn, 'Pappy'..." Charlie said thoughtfully.

"Reminds me of pap smears," I said, laughing hysterically.

The color drained out of Charlie's face. "Maybe not, then."

The entire room filled with laughter.

* * *

I returned home that night with a smile on my face. As much as I didn't want to admit it to myself, I found life on the reservation easy-going, calming... I always came back from Jacob's in a good mood... well, when he wasn't being pig-headed, at least. I wasn't sure if it was because of the setting on the reservation or because Jacob was just a perpetually happy person. He almost always tried to make sure I was in a good mood.

I walked into Carlisle's office to find him studying over a book on the lymphatic system.

"Carlisle?" I asked him.

"Bella?" he asked, looking up from his desk at me.

"Do you have a minute?" I asked him.

"Sure," he said, getting up and walking over to the front of his desk.

"I know we talked about having the baby here and you bringing the epidural and everything and just doing everything here," I rambled.

"Yes," Carlisle said, nodding.

"Is there some way we could do it at the hospital instead?" I asked. "Jacob wants to have some of his family be there for the birth and I think being surrounded by vampires here might make some of them feel a bit.. uncomfortable. I thought the hospital would be a more neutral location..." I broke off uncomfortably.

"If you want to have the baby at the hospital, then that's fine," Carlisle said. "I can still be your doctor and deliver the baby there, if that's what you're asking."

I nodded.

"Bella?"

Rosalie was standing at the door, looking just as uncomfortable as I felt.

"Yeah?" I asked, looking at her strangely. Rosalie was definitely the last person I expected to come looking for me.

"Can we talk?" she asked me.

"Sure," I said quickly. "Thanks, Carlisle."

"No problem," he said, going back to his notes on his desk. I turned and followed Rosalie to her study downstairs. It was a place I hadn't been before. The entire room was a dusty blue and transparent bookshelves lined the eastern wall. She sat down on the cream chaise lounge in one corner and invited me to sit on the matching loveseat next to her.

"You never came to visit me," she said quietly. "Was my letter too straightforward?" she asked, looking up at the ceiling.

"No," I said. "I'm sorry, Rose. I've just been busy."

"You know, I know you love Edward," she said, looking over at me. "But if I were you, I would want more than just _this_," she said, gesturing to her gorgeous figure.

"I do want more than that," I said quietly. I rested one hand on my belly and sighed. "That's why I'm in this predicament in the first place."

"Bella," Rosalie sighed, straightening up. "If I were you, I wouldn't want to be with anyone but the father of my child. I'd want the whole happy family, the whole enchilada," she said, grimacing. "I'd think of myself, put myself first. But then again, that's what I've always done. That's what I did when I was twelve years old and my father brought me the fanciest dresses from London. It's what I did when I celebrated my engagement to Royce King. And it's what I did when I begged Carlisle to change Emmett into one of us. I've had a history of doing what I had to in order to put myself first. I'm not proud of it." She sighed once more before continuing. "I think you're choosing wrong, Bella. You're trying to make everyone else happy, but deep in your heart, you know that you want to be with Jacob. Otherwise, you wouldn't have done some of the things you've done recently." She met my eyes and I knew she was talking about my slip-up with Edward and my constant presence in La Push.

For once, I was silent. I didn't know what to say.

"You don't deny it," she said quietly.

"I can't," I whispered.

"Then you know what you have to," she said. "He'll be fine. He's strong. He'll move on. But you only have this short life and you can't waste it trying to make everyone else happy. That's no life at all."

"But Rosalie -- "

A soft knock at the door interrupted me.

"Rose?" Edward called. I breathed out ever so slightly, nervously.

"Yes?" Rosalie asked, rolling her eyes. She got up and headed toward the door and threw it open, one hand on her hip.

"Can I talk to Bella?" he asked her.

"We were busy," Rosalie snapped. "Whatever," she said, looking toward me and nodding toward Edward. She smiled at me ever so slightly as I got up to join him. She leaned in and gave me a quick hug. "Thanks for talking," she said. "Even though we really didn't get to have much of a conversation."

"You're welcome," I said weakly.

Edward wrapped his cold hand around mine and we walked up the stairs to our bedroom. He sat down on the bed and looked up at me.

"I'm sorry about what I said this morning," he said. "That was completely out of line."

I didn't say anything. I bit my bottom lip and looked down at the floor, my hands resting at the small of my back.

"I was just upset because you haven't been around that much lately. I'm sort of... jealous of Jacob because he was able to give you the one thing that I couldn't. I just feel like we're growing apart and I'm trying to pull you closer to me, but every time I do, you get frustrated and you run to _him_. I don't know what to do, Bella. If you want to be with Jacob, then I can let you out of this marriage... I just want you to be happy."

I was stunned... Edward was giving in? What was this?

"Edward, I'm married to you. We're going to work this out. I'm jsut a little... preoccupied right now. This baby is going to be here really soon... we've got five weeks to prepare for her arrival. I love you, Edward. We're going to figure this out, okay?"

Edward nodded. He didn't look convinced.

"I talked to Alice this morning... after you left. There's something that she's not telling me. You might want to go and talk to her," he said, sighing. "Maybe you can work it out of her."

I nodded and headed to Alice's room up in the loft. I found her relaxing in her hammock, listening to Claire de Lune and reading a collection of Edgar Allan Poe's poems.

"Hi, Bella," she said, sadly.

"Alice, what's going on? Edward told me that something was wrong..."

"Nothing's wrong," she said.

"Obviously something is. I didn't squeeze myself up that tiny staircase for nothing," I said irritably.

"I had a vision this morning... after you left. But you haven't realized it yet... you've made your decision..." she sighed.

"My decision?" I frowned. "My decision is to stay with Edward. We've already discussed this." Even as I said it, it didn't feel right. I knew who I wanted... and it wasn't Edward Cullen. But that didn't matter. What I wanted didn't matter in the slightest. I knew that leaving Edward would break his heart. And no hearts were going to be broken because of me.

Except for Jacob's.

I could feel my chest tightening. I couldn't break Jacob's heart. But I couldn't break Edward's either.

"I can see you thinking," Alice said. "It's not fair to stay with Edward if you love Jacob more than you love Edward. It's not fair to him and it's not fair to you and it's _certainly _not fair to Norah."

"I can't leave him!" I cried, collapsing in the middle of the floor. "I can't do it! And I won't do it, Alice! I can't _survive_ without him."

"You keep telling yourself that, but I don't think it's true. You keep telling yourself that so you have to stay with him. Just because you married him doesn't mean you love him more than you do Jacob. You just made a decision because you had to. You've got time before the baby gets here. Things are ready at both places. Everything's just waiting on you, Bella."

She hopped down from the hammock and hugged me tightly.

"No matter what happens, Bella, you're my sister. I love you," she said. "And I'll do whatever you need me to do for you. I just wish I could make this decision easy for you. I know it's got to be unbelievably hard."

I just shook my head, choking back tears.

"Calm down, Bella," she said. "Calm down..." she murmured. "Don't get so worked up. It's not good for the baby."

I forced my emotions back under control.

"Alright," I said, unable to cry anymore. I was all cried out by that point. That's all I had done all day long.

"You know, just because you're the first person Edward's fallen in love with doesn't mean that there won't be anyone else. I mean, he has eternity. But you only have this one short life. The best I can tell you is to make the most of it."

I knew she was right. I just didn't know what it had to be so difficult. I thought back to a phrase I'd once told myself so often... _Death is peaceful, easy. Life is harder._

Boy, was that ever true.

* * *

_Another chapter finished! Two posted today! I'm on a roll! I'm also very beat. I forgot this was the longest chapter in the fic. Ick. Over 4,600 words. My longest chapter ever for a fan fic. EVER. Yay me. This is your reward for getting me past 300 reviews on this story!_

Anyway, thanks for reading! Don't forget to review!  
I really liked the quote from Twilight at the end. hehe. :D  
xoxo


	15. Total Eclipse of the Heart

Chapter 15 -- Total Eclipse of the Heart

* * *

Disclaimer: If Jacob Black were mine, I would be the happiest girl alive.

A/N: You might want to play "Total Eclipse of the Heart" by Laura Branigan. Right now. While you read this. It will make the experience amazing. LOL. ;)

* * *

I don't remember ever making a conscious decision to fall in love with Isabella Swan. I'm not sure what triggered it. However, mid-way through searching for my missing copy of _The Notebook_ (which I planned to watch with Bella at some point) while moving, I found a home video labeled 'Jacob Black -- Age 4." I gaped at it for a while and then stuck it in the VHS player.

_"Bewwa! Bewwa!"_ I was yelling at the top of my lungs. _"Wook what I found!"_

_"What?" _Bella asked me, running over.

The four year old version of me picked up a sand dollar I had found on the La Push shoreline. I waved it at the camera.

_"Can I have it?" _Bella asked, pouting.

_"No!" _I yelled. I was running away from her now, the sand dollar clutched in my small hand.

_"Please?" _Bella begged.

_"What do I get_?" I was asking her now, sticking out my tongue.

_"I'll let you kiss me_," Bella was saying, smiling broadly back at me.

The scene flipped over to me kissing Bella, just a peck on the lips.

_"My Jacob, always the ladies man." _I heard my mother's voice in the background.

Bella pulled away and grabbed the sand dollar out of my hand while I was looking at her rather stupidly.

_"Hey!" _I was yelling now. _"No fair, Bewwa! That's cheating!"_ My chin was stuck out in defiance. Bella just stuck her tongue out at me and turned around, running away. I chased after her, but she was a year and a half older than me. Taller. She could run a lot faster.

It was the summer. Bella must have been five, then.

I smiled to myself as I watched her run down the sandy beach. I looked back at my four-year-old self, who was now pouting, running to the camera with tear-stained cheeks, wailing, needing comfort from my mother.

I didn't remember the beach scene happening. I guess I was just too little. But for a second, I found myself wishing I was four years old again... I knew that's when I must have fallen in love with her. Maybe even before then... who really knew? I sure as hell didn't. Things sure hadn't changed much at any rate.

Then again, things weren't as simple as they were when I was four, that's for sure. Bella was due in four weeks... a month... and then I would be a dad. I knew that if Norah was anywhere near as pretty as Bella, I'd have to have a baseball bat handy to beat all of the boys off of her. I didn't really relish the thought.

Nearly everything was moved into the house. The shower had been almost two weeks beforehand. My bedroom at Billy's was completely cleared out, moved into Sue's old bedroom. Sue's bed was staying in the master bedroom, so my bed was staying put in my old bedroom. I figured Billy could just turn my bedroom into a guest bedroom or something.

I didn't know what it was going to be like... to be all alone in that house. I was glad that it was only right down the street from Billy. I knew he'd still need me for a few things... to make breakfast for him in the morning, dinner for him at night. Billy would always need a caretaker and I would only live right down the street from him. It was the ideal situation.

I took the last box of things over to the house and put them away in the master bedroom. I sat down in the rocking chair in the nursery and just rocked, trying to clear my head. Tonight would be the first night in my new house... a fully-fledged adult at seventeen. As much as I was looking forward to it, I was slightly apprehensive about this new role, the new direction my life was headed in.

The phone was ringing in the kitchen. I got up and answered it, wondering who could possibly be calling me. Billy couldn't possibly miss me that much already.

"Hey Jake," Bella said.

"How did you know where I was?" I asked her, confused.

"I called over at Billy's and he said that you had moved into your new place. He gave me the number," she explained.

"Yeah," I said. "I didn't think about how lonely it would be until I got here. The house just feels empty," I sighed.

"Well, it won't be for long," Bella said. "I've been having Braxton Hicks all night long." I could hear the bitterness in her voice.

"Braxton Hicks?" I asked, frowning. "Is that a person?"

Bella just laughed. "No... they're false contractions. Not the real thing, but annoying nevertheless. Do you want me to come over?" she asked.

"You know the answer to that already," I told her. "But I thought you were going to work things out with Edward?" I asked suddenly.

"You really want me cuddling up to Edward tonight, trying to get back in his good graces?" she asked. I could practically hear her rolling her eyes.

"You know that's not what I want," I said quietly.

"Fine. I'll be over in around an hour," she said brightly.

I sighed. I was getting frustrated with Bella being bounced around like a bad check, a rental movie, a kid whose parents couldn't get their shit together. She just couldn't seem to _grasp_ the fact that was screaming at me: I was _so_ sick and tired of all of this.

I finished up putting the last few things away in the kitchen and saw Bella waddling up the walk, wearing a dressy light green maternity shirt that was straining against the expanse of her belly. She held a black umbrella with white polka-dots, fighting against the torrential rain that was pouring down relentlessly. It was nighttime, the sun long gone behind the mountains. I walked across the living room and turned on the porch light so she could make her way up the walk. I opened the door for her and let her in.

"Hey," I said, walking over to sit down on the couch.

"Hey," Bella said brightly, shutting the door. She looked around the living room. "It certainly has a 'Jake-like' feel," she replied.

"Thanks," I said, picking up the baby book next to me and setting it on the coffee table. It just so happened to be the one Billy had bought me. _Fatherhood: Your Journey _by some crazy guy with like ten million kids. Seemed rather extreme to me.

"You're reading?" Bella asked.

"Billy bought this for me," I said, shrugging my shoulders. "This guy and his wife have like fifteen kids and live out on some farm in Kansas."

"Sounds like the Duggars from Arkansas," Bella replied. "Nineteen and counting..."

My jaw dropped. I was freaking out about ONE baby. How could these yahoos do it with TWENTY?"

"You're going to be the next Duggar woman," I teased. "We're going to have twenty kids."

Bella's eyes shot open.

"No we're not," she said. "This pregnancy has been hard enough. I could see maybe one more. Two at most. Not twenty!"

She had me caught at 'one more.' I was suddenly visioning the life I wanted with Bella. It was crystal clear. Bella in the kitchen, making dinner. A little girl and a little boy waiting patiently at the table, my arms around her round belly while she was adding the last stirs to something on the stove. Bella and I on Christmas morning, watching our children open up Christmas gifts. Bella, walking down the aisle in a white dress, a radiant smile on her face, a smile only for me.

"Jake?" she asked, waving her hand in front of my face.

"Yeah?" I asked, ripping my thoughts away from that dangerous vision.

"I was saying that I talked to Carlisle this morning. He did an ultrasound and everything and told me that I've probably got around two weeks left. Maybe three. He said that it probably wouldn't be a good idea for me to travel too far away from Forks until the baby's born."

"Why?" I asked, not comprehending what she was talking about.

"He's afraid that I'll go into labor while I'm here and no one will be able to get me to the hospital in time," she replied.

"Sam got Emily to the hospital," I said grudgingly.

"Yes, but that was a different hospital. Forks is about an hour away from La Push by car," Bella explained. "You can't exactly phase with a pregnant woman in labor on your back."

I saw what she meant. "Yeah."

"I'm just going to be honest here," Bella said, biting her bottom lip. "I don't want to be away from you for three weeks. That's the longest we've been apart in months. It scares me."

"Well, if Carlisle said you need to stay near Forks, you'll stay near Forks," I said. "No arguing." I needed her and Norah to stay safe and if that meant enduring torture for the next three weeks, I'd gladly take every bit of masochistic pain I could... as long as they were okay.

"But Jacob! I don't want to go three weeks without being around you!" she whined.

I was taken by surprise. She didn't want to _not_ be around me?

"It might not be that long. You could have the baby a little early. Besides, I can come visit you, can't I?" I asked her, trying to calm her back down.

"I don't know if you and Edward being in the same general vicinity is a good idea, quite frankly," Bella said, taking a seat next to me on the couch. "Edward is rather... anti-Jacob Black at the moment."

"What did I do?" I asked, remembering the last real conversation I had had with Edward. It had been around nine months ago, but he had been nice to me... civil. What had gone wrong since then?

"It's just the fact that I've been spending so much time here the last few months," Bella said.

"What did he expect me to do? Run away after..." I couldn't bring myself to say _Fuck and run._ Although that was what was running through my head.

"I don't think he expected our relationship to deteriorate to the point it has," Bella said, sighing. One hand flew to her belly. "Aw, damn it..." she groaned.

"What?" I asked her worriedly.

"Another Braxton Hicks," she groaned. "Watch," she said. She raised her shirt up to reveal her round belly. It nearly took my breath away, just seeing it fully for the first time. She winced and I looked closer. SHe placed my hand on her and I could feel her stomach slowly tighten and then release. A few minutes later, it tightened and released again.

"I usually get a few of them at this point in the night," Bella said. "I guess that's why Edward was so against me leaving."

"I doubt that was the only reason," I said darkly.

"You're probably right," Bella sighed. She looked slightly annoyed.

"Do you want to watch a movie or something?" I asked her suddenly. "We never got to finish _Alice in Wonderland_."

"What time is it?" she asked.

"Around eight-thirty," I said. "Once we finish it, if we start it right now, it shound be around eleven or so. Is that too late for you to go home? Will Edward get all pissed off at me?"

"I could care less," Bella said defiantly, setting her jaw. "What movie do you want to watch?"

"You decide," I said. "I have _Pearl Harbor, The Notebook, _and _Knocked Up._"

Bella made a face at the last one.

"Hmn," she said. "Tough call. _Pearl Harbor _is like four hours long or something. I don't want to watch Katherine Heigl birth a baby with Seth Rogan's vulgar humor... so I guess _The Notebook _it is."

"That's what I wanted to watch all along," I said, smiling at her.

"Then you should have just put it in. I wouldn't have minded," she replied.

I put the movie in and came back over to sit next to her. I grabbed the remote controller and pressed play. She leaned into me and I wrapped my arms around her. She seemed a little cold. She sighed rested her head on my arm. I watched the colors from the TV reflect off her eyes and grinned as she smiled at little funny parts in the movie.

As the rain came pouring down on the television screen and Allie and Noah kissed passionately in the middle of the torrential thunderstorm, I leaned into her ear.

"Reminds me of you and me, you know."

She turned and looked at me strangely and before I knew what was going on, her lips were on mine, her hands on my shoulders. She turned all the way around to face me and pushed me down on the couch.

"Whoa, slow down Bella," I murmured.

"Not a chance," she replied.

I couldn't believe this was happening. Bella was in my house, on my couch, kissing me on her own free will. What had happened? We continued to make out for the next half hour, the movie forgotten.

Eventually, Bella came back up for air. "Jake," she murmured in my ear.

"What?" I asked, my heart gallumphing erratically in my chest.

"I want you to make love to me," she whispered.

I froze, my heart skidding to a near stop.

"Bella, I don't know if we should," I said, gesturing to her belly.

Her reaction nearly broke my heart. Rejection seemed to wash over her and I could see the tears stinging her eyes.

"You're married, we're not together..." I continued, breaking off.

"I want you, Jacob. I want _you_," she murmured. "Please."

I kissed her softly. "I want to," I admitted. My self-control was pathetic and I could not ignore the pounding sensation in my groin. "Is it safe?"

"Yes," Bella whispered. "I'm sure."

Without asking any other questions, I got up from the couch. I took her hands into mine and gently pulled her to her feet. She kissed me once more and my hands snaked around her belly.

I picked her up, not breaking our kiss, and headed toward the bedroom. I laid her on the king-sized bed, the moonlight from the open window illuminating her pale white skin. I pulled away, taking her in. She was so beautiful.

I sat down on the bed next to her, my hands roaming over her large belly, taking her shirt off as my hands went higher and higher. I kissed her belly, making a trail all the way up it. She giggled.

"Jake, that tickles!" she laughed.

I pulled her shirt off and threw it to the side. She pulled her sports bra over her hand and threw it across the room. Her breasts were full and I found it impossible not to stare.

Bella noticed my gaze on her.

"I forgot," she said, blushing. "I didn't have these the last time we -- "

I kissed her, stopping her in mid-sentence. I pulled down her maternity pants and she kicked them off, reaching for my sweatpants. It was a mad frenzy. I needed her every single bit as she appeared to need me.

I continued to kiss her, every single bit of skin I could find. Our hands romaed freely over one another as we kissed. Bella was writing underneath me, grinding her center against my thigh. The constant pounding in my groin grew to an almost unbearable limit. Panting for breath, Bella pulled her lips from mine. She ran her small hand along my length and looked into my eyes. "Jake, please..."

My breath hitched at the look of ultimate desire on her face. I needed no further encouragement. Bella raised herself up on her hands and knees and I entered her from behind. She shivered for a brief second in relief and moaned aloud. She leaned up, reaching her head around and kissed me deeply.

"You have no idea how long I've needed this," she murmured.

I never recalled setting a rhythm. My body simply took over as my mind was completely consumed by everything that was Bella. I was not aware of where my hands were traveling, how even my rhythm was, or how fast or how hard I was thrusting. All I knew was the warmth and comfort of Bella.

"Oh... Yes, Jacob!" she cried out in ecstasy, only mere moments before my own climax crashed over me like a tidal wave.

We collapsed, gasping for breath. I pulled Bella close to me, kissing her on her forehead, completely sated. She looked up at me, a small smile playing about her lips.

"What?" I breathed.

"I love you, Jacob Black," she whispered, kissing me tenderly. My heart thudded still once more.

I never truly understood why I had fallen in love with Isabella Swan. I didn't understand it in the slightest. I wasn't sure what made Bella so... irresistible to me, why I couldn't find anyone else, why I loved her more than life itself. I didn't need an answer. All I knew was that I would never stop fighting for her.

"I love you more," I murmured, kissing the top of her head.

_I wouldn't want to be Edward Cullen in the morning,_ I thought, pulling Bella closer to me.

* * *

I suddenly saw a bright light peering through my eyelids. I groaned and turned my face back into my pillow, trying to turn away from the blinding brightness.

"Jacob," a soft female voice murmured, prodding me.

"Five more minutes," I groaned.

"No, Jacob!" the voice insisted, sounding rather frantic. "We need to go _now!_"

"Hmn?" I groaned intelligibly. I rolled over and opened one eye. Bella had a scared, frantic look on her face. I sat up and rubbed the sleep out of my eyes. It wasn't until I moved the blanket that I realized that it was soaking wet.

_Holy shit._

* * *

_A new chapter finished! Yay me!  
Btw, I know I mentioned this at the beginning of the chapter, but if you listen to "Total Eclipse of the Heart" by Laura Branigan, it'll make you smile, especially if you listen to it while you're reading this chapter. :)_

_Please remember to review!  
And thanks for reading!  
xoxo_


	16. I Dare You to Move

Chapter 16 -- I Dare You to Move

* * *

**Disclaimer:** As much as it hurts to admit it, Jacob Black is not mine and he will never be because he is a fictional character that is not of my own imagination. :(

**A/N:** The song for this chapter is Switchfoot's "I Dare You to Move." VERY good song. I suggest you give it a listen while you read this chapter. Hehe. I should become a song marketer. :D I would also like to clarify that La Push is only 20 minutes from Forks, but when writing this, I didn't realize that. For the sake of the story, La Push is an hour away from Forks. :)

* * *

"Jacob, I think my water just broke," Bella gasped, her eyes wide with shock. My eyes popped open and I realized the entire bed I was lying in wasn't soaked with water, but with _fluid._ I jumped up and pulled on my sweatpants.

"We've got to get you to the hospital. Now," I said.

"I didn't realize -- " Bella broke off, biting down on her bottom lip, one hand pushing down on her lower abdomen. I froze in shock for a split second before throwing her bra and underwear to her. I ran over to my dresser and pulled out one of my biggest t-shirts and sat it on the bed next to her. I pulled on a t-shirt and slid on a pair of flip-flops that I rarely wore. I ran into the living room and grabbed her rain boots.

"Where is your stuff that you were going to take to the hospital?" I asked her.

"In the car," Bella moaned.

"Alright," I said. "Keys?" I asked frantically.

"Car," she gasped.

I quickly helped her get dressed and then picked her up and headed outside with her. I put her in the passenger-side seat of the car, doing my best not to freak out.

"What are you doing?" she asked as I calimbed into the driver's seat.

"I'm driving you to the hospital, Bella," I replied.

"You can't drive my -- " she broke off again. I checked the clock in the car. If the clocks were sychronized to the samne time, then that was her second contraction in four minutes. I cursed, slamming my hand on the steering wheel. Of course, it didn't cause much harm to the bullet-proof steel steering wheel. I spun out of the driveway and Bella reached for her cell phone in the center console.

"I'm calling Edward," she said.

"Can't you wait to call Edward until we get closer to the hospital?" I asked. "I don't want him freaking out before we even get there."

"NO!" Bella snapped. "I'm calling Edward NOW."

"Fine," I said, not bothering to argue with her. I got into the emergency lane and pushed the pedal to the floorboard. We shot forward like a bullet. I couldn't help but thank Edward for getting Bella a bullet-proof car that went nearly 200 miles per hour. It really helped in situations like this. If she had still had her old truck, then I probably would have had to deliver my daughter in the truck bed on the side of the road. At any rate, it was four in the morning. I highly doubted any police officers would be out at this point in the night.

"I can't see how I slept through these," Bella cried as another contraction rocked through her. I could tell that she was on the edge of tears and I felt completely helpless.

It took us fifteen minutes to get to the hospital instead of the usual hour. We didn't get stopped by a single police officer. I was rather suprised, yet thankful.

_Welcome to the planet.  
Welcome to existence.  
Everyone's here, everyone's here.  
Everybody's watching you now.  
Everybody waits for you now.  
What happens next?  
What happens next?_

We pulled into the parking lot and Edward was waiting for us as I parked. He quickly opened the door and helped Bella out.

"Bella!" he exclaimed, taking in her appearance. She must have looked rather strange wearing a t-shirt and rain boots. He wrapped her in his stone cold granite arms. I wanted to tear them off of her.

"Thanks, Jacob," he said grudgingly. "I think we can take it from here."

"Excuse me?" I asked, setting my jaw.

"Edward, don't be ridiculous," Bella said. "Jacob has to -- " She broke off as another contraction rocked through her.

"How far apart are her contractions, dog?" Edward snapped.

"Three minutes," I said. Edward gaped at me for a split second and then picked Bella up and dashed into the hospital at the speed of light.

"Great," I muttered as a bright yellow Porsche pulled up beside me. "Looks like I'm going to have to find this place all by myself."

"Don't be ridiculous, Jacob," Alice Cullen said, getting out of the car that had pulled up next to me. "I'll help you find her. She's going to be in Labor and Delivery. She'll have the baby in Unit B and then they'll transfer her to Room 411."

I gaped at her. I knew she could see the future, but I had never personally seen the results of one of her visions before.

"I told Edward he wouldn't be able to get rid of you that easily," Alice said, shaking her head. "Come on."

Alice led me into the hospital and we went up to the second floor of the Women's Pavilion. Alice stopped at the desk.

"Hi, we're here with Isabella Cullen. I'm her sister and this is her baby's father," Alice told the nurse, an older woman who looked like a bitch. "Is there a way Jacob here could be in the delivery room while she has the baby?"

"You're the baby's father?" the nurse eyed me, setting her jaw.

"Yes ma'am," I said, figuring it best to be as polite as werewolfly possible.

"Then the young man who followed her in there would be..." she trailed off, placing one hand on her rather large hip.

"Her husband?" Alice supplied.

I could tell what this bitchy nurse was already thinking. My eyes narrowed.

"Only two people are allowed in the delivery room," she said. "You'll have to wait outside, young lady," she told Alice.

"Okay," Alice replied brightly.

The nurse looked taken aback by Alice's bright attitude. "Labor and Delivery, Unit B. Do you need someone to show you where it is?" she asked.

_I dare you to move,  
I dare you to move,  
I dare you to lift yourself up off the floor._

"No," Alice said. "I know where it is. My father works here. Dr. Cullen."

The nurse's attitude suddenly changed.

"Okay, miss. If there's anything you need, just let me know!"

I stifled my laughter as we headed toward the delivery room.

"That always works," Alice grinned.

I walked into the delivery room. Bella was lying in the bed, already in a hospital gown. Edward was standing next to her, holding her hand. He glared at me.

"She's already seven centimeters," Dr. Fang said, shaking his head. "I don't see how she just slept through this much of her labor."

"She's Bella," I said, shrugging.

"At the rate she's progressing," he continued, "the baby should be here within three hours or so. I'm afraid that since she's already in transition, it's too late to give her an epidural. She's just too far along."

Bella groaned and I walked over to the other side of the bed and took her hand into mine, stroking it.

"This is all my fault," I whispered, trying not to think about the night before. Unbidden, the memory came flooding back to the forefront of my thoughts.

Edward's head snapped up and he glared at me.

"It's not," Bella said. "It's really not. I -- " she broke off again as another contraction hit.

"You dirty, filty, mangy mutt," Edward growled, in a voice much too high for Bella to hear.

My eyes flashed to him and I deliberately let my mind settle on the part where Bella explicitly _asked_ me to make love to her.

I saw the pain hit his eyes and he stumbled backward. I'd never seen a bloodsucker stumble before; it was a relatively new experience.

"Edward, are you okay?" Bella asked him. "Why don't you sit down?"

"I'm fine," Edward said, shaking his head. He sat down in the chair next to him and scooted it up to Bella.

_I dare you to move,  
I dare you to move,  
I dare you to lift yourself up off the floor._

"I can't believe this is really happening," Bella said, shaking her head. "It doesn't feel quite real yet," she gasped.

"It will when she gets here," I assured her. "Remember what Emily said? It won't feel real until you're holding her. And we have just a few short hours until then, okay?"

"It'll be fine, Bella. I'm so sorry that you couldn't get an epidural. I wish Jacob could have gotten you here sooner, though. Maybe that would have helped." He glared at me while he said this and I knew he was blaming Bella's pain on me.

"I hate hospitals," she groaned, trying to sit up in the bed. I knew how much she hated hospitals... from her ER experiences while we were riding motorcycles and stuff. I suddenly remembered Bella's ruse after she had wrecked her bike... how we had run back to Charlie's and she had changed clothes and said she had hit herself in the head with a hammer in my dad's garage. I smirked.

"Remember when Tyler Crowley nearly ran over you with his van?" Edward asked. "Carlisle told me how _sullen_ you seemed while he was checking you over."

"Edward, no offense, but I _really _don't feel like talking right now," Bella gasped, closing her eyes.

"Of course you don't," I said, moving her hair out of her face. She grabbed my hand and squeezed it tightly. Edward glared at me yet again, boring holes in my head. I steadied my resolve. Edward Cullen was not going to make me feel like the outcast at the birth of my own child.

_Welcome to the fallout..._

"Jacob, could I talk to you in the hallway for a minute?" Edward asked suddenly.

"Edward..." Bella whined. "Be nice to Jacob." She turned to face me and gave me a look, saying the same thing without the words.

"Believe me, Bella. I won't hurt him," Edward said, kissing her on the forehead. I wanted to strangle the filthy bloodsucker.

Dr. Fang was walking back up the hallway as we stepped outside.

"Oh, are you leaving?" he asked us.

"I'll be right back," I said.

"Alice wants to come on. I'll let her while the two of you are gone," he said. "I tried to bend the more than two person rule, but it's a hospital rule and I can't."

"It's alright," I replied. "I doubt Bella wants a whole bunch of people in there when the baby's born anyway."

"How do you know what Bella wants?" Edward asked after Dr. Fang and Alice had gone into the room and shut the door.

"I know Bella," I said simply.

_Welcome to resistence..._

"So if you know Bella, then why are you forcing her to be with you when she's married to me? You realized that whatever happened between the two of you last night was equivalent to _adultery?_" he asked, his voice strangled.

"You know that's not what I've been doing!" I growled. "I told her I wasn't going to tear her in half anymore. If she chooses me on her own accord, then so be it. But I would _never_ force Bella to do anything against her own will. So don't you _ever _suggest that again," I said menacingly.

"If she chooses you, then I'll deal with it. But just because she's having your baby doesn't mean she's going to choose you!" Edward spat.

"Don't you realize that those two things are in direct conflict?" I asked. "How is a human BABY going to fit into a coven full of vampires?" I taunted him. "Especially when your brother is a relatively new _vegetarian? _It doesn't work like that!"

"Really," Edward spat. "I could just as easily turn both Bella and the baby into vampires. Well, the baby once she's around thirteen or so... before the werewolf gene has a chance to enact, even if it does at all. What if I told you that's what I was planning when I had suggested this whole thing?"

_I dare you to move,  
I dare you to move,  
I dare you to lift yourself up off the floor._

I could feel the familar shuddering... my hands were shaking.

"That is _my _daughter!" I roared. "You will do no such thing!"

Dr. Fang ran out into the hallway.

"Will you two keep it down?" he groaned. "Do you really want to be kicked out of here? Really now -- "

He stopped mid-sentence when he noticed my erratic shaking.

"Jacob, get in here. Now," he hissed.

I went back into the room to see Bella staring at me in shock. I was on edge, trying to keep myself under control. This was _not_ the place to lose it. I would not phase here. I couldn't phase here. Bella needed me. Bella and _Norah --_ my daughter -- needed me. The shaking slowly calmed back down as I reigned myself back under control.

"Am I going to have to separate the two of you?" Dr. Fang asked me. "I don't want to have to do that. As the baby's biological father, you have the right to be in here. Edward doesn't, even though he is Bella's husband. Please, Jacob. Don't make me have to do that."

"I'm not the one that started all of this," I snapped. "Edward said he was going to -- " I stopped. Bella didn't need to hear this. Not now.

He leaned over and checked Bella again.

"You're almost there," he said. "Nine centimeters. You'll have Norah really soon, okay? She's almost here. You'll be able to start pushing here in around an hour at the most. Come on, Alice," he said. "I need to go talk to Edward." I knew Dr. Fang was giving me a moment alone with Bella and I truly appreciated it.

"Jacob?" she breathed.

"Yeah?" I asked, looking over at her.

"Come sit with me," she said, closing her eyes in pain.

I obliged her request and sat down next to her. I reached over and entwined my fingers in the space between hers.

"She's almost here, Jake," she said, blinking back tears. Her face was shining with sweat, her hair plastered to her face. "I'm going to be a mommy in less than an hour."

"You will," I said, encouraging her.

"And you're going to be a daddy," she breathed.

"Yep," I said brightly.

"It just doesn't seem right," she cried. "It doesn't seem right at all!"

"What doesn't seem right?" I asked her, alarmed. "Norah being here is the rightest thing in the world!"

"Not that," she sniffed "It's just that... if I'm the mommy and you're the daddy, we should be together. Why should things be broken and everything before they even start?"

My jaw dropped. Was this it? Was she finally coming to her senses? Was she finally choosing _me? _

"I don't know what to do!" she cried.

"Don't think about that right now, honey," I said. "Concentrate on Norah. She's almost here. She'll be here in just a few minutes now, Bells." I caressed her cheek, trying to calm her back down. The minutes slowly passed. I held Bella's hand and as each contraction rocked through her, she squeezed my hand through it all. I wished I could take all the pain away, but there was nothing I could do.

Dr. Fang came back in a few minutes later, Edward by his side. He checked her again.

"Ten centimeters!" he exclaimed. "Great job, Bella!" he praised her. He headed out of the room and came back with two nurses.

"Alright," he said, positioning himself between her legs. "Edward, Jacob, I want you two to slowly count to ten. Bella, I need you to give me a big push, okay?"

Bella nodded nervously and Edward locked his eyes with mine.

"One, two, three..."

I didn't take my eyes off Edward's.

"...seven, eight, nine, ten!"

"Good job, Bella!" Dr. Fang said, looking up at her. "One more!"

Edward and I started to count again.

"One, two, three..."

I looked at Bella this time. Her eyes were closed, her back slightly bent forward, her chin tucked in. Her face was a look of steel determination. I had never loved her more than in this moment.

"...eight, nine, ten!"

"I can see the head, Bella! She's crowning!" Dr. Fang crowed. "Two more good pushes and she'll be here."

"Really?" Bella asked, distracted for only a second.

"Come on, honey," I said, hodling her hand. "You can do this!"

Edward glared at me, his gaze seeming all too harsh and unfeeling.

"One, two, three..." he started again.

"...four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten!" I joined in.

"The head's out!" Dr. Fang exclaimed. "She's just waiting on you, Bella. One more push, when you're ready."

Bella pushed before I even had the chance to start counting again. My daughter slipped out and Dr. Fang placed her on Bella's stomach, just as the sun rose up over the mountains, casting the room in an orange glow.

_Welcome to the planet.  
Welcome to existence.  
Everyone's here, everyone's here._

_Maybe redemption has stories to tell,  
Maybe forgiveness is right where you fell.  
Where can you run to escape from yourself?  
Where you gonna go?  
Where you gonna go?  
Salvation is here.  
_

_

* * *

_

She was here. Norah was here. Screaming loudly, her head full of dark hair, matching Jacob's.

"It's a girl!" Carlisle crowed. "Jacob, would you like to come cut the cord?" he asked quietly. I watched as Jacob gaped at him as he handed him a pair of scissors. He pulled himself out of his reverie and cut the cord connecting Norah to me and a nurse took her over the to the table and cleaned her off.

"She's here?" I said, feeling absolutely dazed.

"She is," Jacob whispered, unable to take his eyes off of the tiny baby, kicking and screaming on the other side of the room.

Edward was silent. He walked over to the nurse who was cleaning Norah off and stood back, just watching.

"APGAR is a ten!" the nurse called. "Weight: six pounds, seven ounces!"

I smiled. That was good... better than good. Perfectly amazing. Carlisle smiled brilliantly. He pulled out something reddish-brownish and placed it into a metal pan. I gagged. I looked over at Jacob, who was rooted to the spot, unable to move.

The nurse walked over and placed Norah in Jacob's arms. She wasn't screaming anymore. Jacob touched her tiny cheek, cooing to her. He was already completely captivated by her. I already knew it. Norah was definitely going to be a daddy's girl.

"Hi, baby," he said softly. He looked over at me and came over, placing the baby in my arms.

I looked down at her. She had Jacob's hair, lots of it. It was thick, too. Her eyes were open and they were a warm brown, exactly in my shape. Her skin seemed to be a little lighter than Jake's and her cheekbones were high, just like his. Her nose seemed more like mine though. Not as wide as her daddy's. Looking down at my tiny daughter, I realized that everything on this planet tied me to her now. I wanted the very best for her and I would do anything to make that happen.

_The tension is here,  
The tension is here,  
Between who you are and who you could be,  
Between how it is and how it should be._

"Can I hold her?" Edward asked me, smiling down at Norah.

Edward? Hold my baby? My inner being shifted awy from the idea, but my mind rationalized it. Edward was my husband. Her step-father. Of course he should be able to hold her.

I nodded and Edward scoope dthe tiny baby up into his arms, smiling at her. It didn't feel right at all. Like some stranger was holding my baby. I didn't like it.

Norah started screaming.

The sound of her crying hit me like a knife stabbing through my heart. I reached for her and Edward sat me back into my arms.

"It's okay, baby. Mama's here," I cooed to her.

Jacob smirked.

"Maybe his hands were just cold or something," he said, shrugging.

Alice stuck her head into the room.

"Is my niece here?" she crowed.

I nodded. "She's here," I confirmed.

"Alice, you need to wait until we transfer her to her room. I'm sure you already know which one that is," he told her.

"Alright," she pouted.

"Bella we need to switch you into your room upstairs. They need to take the baby to the nursery for a bit, just to run tests and administer immunizations, that sort of thing. They'll do that while we move you into your room."

I didn't want them to take Norah away so soon. I'd only just met her.

"They'll bring her back," Carlisle said. "It'll be okay."

"Alright," I said, kissing Norah on her forehead. "Bye, Norie," I murmured, handing her over to one of the nurses.

"Apprarently, this is the night for babies," Carlisle said. "There's another one in Unit A andanother couple upstairs with a multiple delivery. She's been here on bed rest for a week or so. That's why we have to go ahead and move you to your room now."

I nodded.

"What time was she born?" I asked him.

"7:16 am," he replied.

"Jacob," I said suddenly, looking around for him. He was still standing next to me.

"What?" he asked, frowning in confusion.

"Levi. Sam and Emily's baby. He was born at 6:17 am," I said. "What a coincidence."

"How do you remember things like that?" he asked me, shaking his head.

"I don't know," I replied. "She was early. It's only April seventeeth." I would have to get her birth stone on my necklace changed from an emerald to a diamond.

"She was," Jacob said, nodding. "Exactly a month early."

"But 37 weeks is considered full term. So she was _really _only a week early," I replied.

"She was too excited to hurry up and get here," Jacob said, shrugging. "Jumping the gun."

"Just like her daddy," I said, teasing.

"Hey," Jacob said, sticking out his tongue at me. "I don't alway jump the gun."

"Sure you don't," I replied sarcastically.

"Just when it caomes to you," Jacob said, shrugging.

Edward glared at me, crossing his arms. I knew he wasn't happy with me. But I couldn't help it. Jacob and Norah and I were going to be together because... because we were a family. The realization of that hit me like punch to the face. Jacob and I had a daughter. And that made us a family. I thought of Norah. She was Phoenix and Forks and La Push and Charlie and Renee and Billy and Jacob and I all put together. Edward and the Cullens weren't included in Norah's genetic make-up... and even though I was going to give her Alice's name, that didn't mean that they were related. I frowned.

I thought of the connection that I had with my tiny daughter... how I felt like I needed to protect her and give her everything that she could ever need or want. I knew what she would want more than anything. I didn't need to pretend. I knew she would grow up wanting a family. Just like I had. A real family... and not the generic substitutes that the Cullens would be. Even Rosalie had said it. Esme had to make do with Edward, Emmett, Rosalie, Alice, and Jasper as substitutes. As much as I... _admired_ Esme, I didn't want a substitute family for my daughter. Not when I had a chance for the real thing.

I knew what I had to do. The decision was perfectly obvious. I knew I was going to hurt Edward, but there was nothing I could do about that.

* * *

_Yay! The baby's here!  
I hope MOST people will be happy with the way the chapter turned out. This scene has been paying in my head for a while and I was listening to "I Dare You to Move" by Switchoot and I knew I had to add lines from that song in here. The bridge is PERFECT for this chapter!  
Anyway, thanks for reading! Don't forget to review!  
I've already got a sequel in the works for this story, but there are two chapters left in this story, so don't think it's over yet!_

_xoxo_


	17. Daughters

Chapter 17 – Daughters

* * *

Disclaimer: I do not own the Twilight Saga. Or Jacob Black. I'm just a poor college student that has nothing better to do in her spare time but write out her fantasies of Jacob Black. LOL.

* * *

Of course, after Norah was born, the first visitor to come into Bella's hospital room was Alice Cullen. Out of all of the bloodsuckers, she was the one I could get along with the most. Apparently, Norah liked her too. At any rate, she didn't cry when Alice held her.

"She started screaming when Edward held her for the first time," Bella said after Alice had bounced into the room, a big grin on her face. Alice held the baby and started cooing to her. Hmn. Never knew the vamps liked the babies.

"That's strange. You're not crying at all now are you, little Norie?" she cooed.

Norie. As much as I disliked the nickname, everyone kept calling her that. It wasn't even a NAME.

The next few days were filled with everyone from La Push coming to see Bella and the baby. Sam and Emily even brought Levi all the way out. I really didn't see the point in them bringing a three-week-old infant to the hospital when he hadn't the slightest idea of what was going on, but oh well.

"She's so small!" Emily said, shaking her head as she held her.

"A whole two and half pounds smaller than Levi," Sam said, nodding toward Levi asleep in his car seat.

"Two pounds, six ounces," Emily corrected.

Sam rolled his eyes. "Do you always have to be right all the time?"

Emily looked at him. "Yes," she said.

Bella laughed, gazing over at our baby in Emily's arms. "I think she looks just like Jacob," she said, looking over at me.

"She does," Emily agreed. "But I think she has your nose. And maybe your eyes," she added as an afterthought.

Charlie came in with Sue and Seth and a half-hearted Leah later on the afternoon after Bella had the baby. Leah was accompanied by a big burly guy that I had seen on my last visit to the Makah rez. I couldn't remember his name.

Charlie held his tiny granddaughter.

"She really looks nothing like you, Bells," he said.

"Gee, thanks Dad," Bella said irritably. "She's mine."

"I don't think that's fair to say," Sue said. "She's got Bella's nose. And her eyes. Your eyes," she said, looking over at Charlie and smiling.

"Huh, maybe," Charlie said, handing Norah back to Bella. "Well Jacob looks just like his mom and so if Norah looks like Jacob, I guess she looks like her Great-Granny Norah," he rationalized. "So maybe it all works out."

"Haha, maybe," I said, crossing my arms.

"She is pretty cute, even if she _does_ look like Jacob," Seth said, elbowing me.

"Hey! You know, she kind of looks like you, Seth," I said. "All small, with big eyes and chunky cheeks." I gave his cheeks a pinch.

"Okay, okay… I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that," he said, a slight grin on his face.

"Hey Jake," Leah said, looking toward the door. She had been completely silent the whole time. I noticed she was holding the Makah guy's hand. Were they going out? I didn't waste time on worrying about it. She smiled at me briefly and nodded toward the door. "Look who's here," she said.

I looked up at the door and saw Billy in his chair, being wheeled into the room by Sam.

"You called and told me that Bella had had the baby, but no one offered to come out to La Push to come and get me," he grumbled. "Sam here was nice enough to come and pick me up and bring me out. He'd been up here once already." Billy was obviously disgruntled.

"Sorry, Dad," I said. "I was going to come get you, but things just got kind of hectic around here."

"Where's Edward?" Billy asked, looking around.

"He went to go get something to eat," Bella lied. In truth, we hadn't seen Edward all day, not since the baby had been born and Bella had been transferred to her hospital room.

Billy's eyes narrowed.

"He should have just gone down to the cafeteria," Charlie said. "He hasn't been here for a while, has he?"

"It's been a while," Bella admitted. "I think he just probably wanted to give Jacob and me some alone time with the baby." Bella was turning into quite a suave liar. I wasn't sure if that was a good thing or not.

"Well, I guess we're going to leave," Charlie said. "The game starts at six o'clock and I don't want to miss the opening pitch."

"Alright," Bella said gamely. "I guess I'll see you around?" she asked him.

"Yeah, of course," Charlie said. "Don't keep that baby away for too long, now. I want to see my granddaughter here and there."

"I'll bring her around in a few weeks. Once her immune system is strong enough and I feel up to it," she promised.

"Alright," Charlie said. Sue, Seth, and Leah followed him out the door.

"What is up with her?" Bella asked me after they had left.

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"She just sat in the corner, sullen and glaring at everybody," Bella said, an offended tone to her voice. "And I didn't even know the guy that was with her. I didn't think there were going to be strange people coming up into my hospital room like that."

"I don't know," I said. "She's Leah. That's what she does. And I think she might be dating that guy. He looks like someone I remember seeing at the Makah rez."

"Well, if it keeps her distracted and takes her interest away from you, then I'm happy about it," she said.

I looked over at Billy, who was trying to hide the grin on his face. "Can I hold the baby?" he asked Bella, interrupting our conversation. "I can't really see her too proper."

"Sure," Bella said, temporarily distracted. She handed Norah to me and I placed her in Billy's arms.

"Wow, kid," Billy said, looking down at the baby in his arms. "She looks just like you. Just like Sam said."

"Told you," Sam said, smiling at Billy.

"She's got my eyes though. And my nose," Bella piped up.

"Yeah," Billy said. "I can sort of see that."

I could tell she was disgruntled that no one could see her in Norah at all. The occasional person would say something about her nose or her eyes, but almost everyone commented on how much Norah looked like me.

"She looks a lot like Jacob's mother," Billy said. "Jacob looks almost nothing like me. We have the same hair, that's about it. I'm glad you named her after someone on our side of the family. It means a lot to me," he said, looking up at Bella.

"You're welcome, I guess," Bella said, laughing.

I could smell a vampire coming. I figured it was probably Edward. He walked into the room a few seconds later and Billy glared at him, handing the baby back to me.

Sam and I locked eyes for a brief second.

"Billy, I think it's time we get going," Sam said. "We'll come back tomorrow, okay?" he said.

"Alright," Billy said. "I don't want to keep you from Emily and Levi," he said, handing Norah back to me.

"We'll see you guys tomorrow," Sam said, nodding toward me and Bella. He brushed roughly past Edward and wheeled Billy back down the hallway.

"We need to talk," Edward said abruptly to Bella.

"What is there to talk about?" I asked him, glaring at him.

"Jacob!" Bella admonished me.

"There's plenty to talk about, mongrel," Edward snapped. He turned back to Bella. "Look, I saw Jacob's thoughts when you were admitted to the hospital this morning. He was freaking out because he thought what you two… did… caused you to go into labor." I saw the pain in his eyes but at that point, I really didn't care too much. The way I saw it, the bloodsucker's comment after that little inside glimpse into my mind was out of line and he deserved every last bit of pain it caused him.

"Okay," Bella said, biting her bottom lip. Her eyes flashed from Edward to me and then back to Edward.

"I need to know who you're going to choose in the end," he said. "I realize that the baby being here changes things a bit. But you sleeping with Jacob is completely inexcusable, Bella. I'm willing to put up with whatever you need me to, but sleeping with Jacob is just a little out of line, don't you think? I love you and I just want you to be happy. If Jacob makes you happy, then you should be with him…" he broke off, looking down at the ground.

"Edward, I do love you," Bella said. "But I think I owe it to my daughter to be with her father. It's strange," she said, looking over at the baby in my arms. "But once she actually _got_ here, I found myself wanting the very best for her. I just don't think me becoming a vampire and raising a baby, a human baby at that… I don't think it works. The two don't go together. I appreciate everything you've done for me, but I just… I don't know anymore. I still care about you, but having Norah… it's just bonded me to Jacob." She paused, wiping tears away from her eyes. "I hate hurting you like this – "

"Don't worry about me," Edward said, holding her hands in his. "I just want you to be happy. And I told Jacob a long time ago that he'd be better suited for you than another human. He has the ability to protect you. If it's not me, then I'd rather you be with Jacob."

Bella nodded, blinking tears out of her eyes. I focused on Norah, trying to not pay attention to the scene unfolding in front of me. She was fast asleep in my arms.

Edward's tone was suddenly businesslike and I wondered if he was trying to keep his tone calm or if he was about to cry. Could vampires cry?

"Emmett's well-versed in law. I can have him draw up the divorce papers. Would you rather me send them to Charlie's or Jacob's?" he asked her.

"Jacob's is fine. I guess I'll go there for a while until I figure out what to do," she said. "Charlie's doesn't have a nursery and the one at Jacob's is completely finished…" she trailed off. "Edward, I'm really not trying to hurt you. I had no idea what the fallout would be from this… situation. I'm so sorry."

"Don't be," Edward said, standing up. "You have a beautiful baby. I knew exactly what this… situation could end up entailing. I always knew that there was a good chance that you would choose Jacob in the end. I took that risk and I fought tooth and nail for you, but I can't compete with both Jacob _and_ a baby."

"It's not about competing!" Bella exclaimed. "In the end, I was the one who had to make the choice. It wouldn't have mattered if you could give me kids in the future or if you could buy me everything on the face of the planet and give me an eternal life with you. In the end, I fell in love with Jacob. I can't help it. I had his baby growing inside of me for eight months and that kind of connection… there's nothing like it. I had no idea what that would do to me. And Norah _deserves_ to have a family. Not a broken one like I had. I want to give her everything that I didn't have growing up. And the best way to do that is by being with Jacob and listening to what my heart is telling me."

Edward nodded.

"I see," he said shortly. "Well, if you don't mind, I need to be going. I'll be in touch shortly." He leaned in and gave her a quick kiss on the cheek. He got up swiftly and walked out of the door. As soon as he was out of sight, Bella dissolved into tears. I placed Norah in her little incubator and walked over to Bella and sat on the bed next to her.

"It's okay," I said, wrapping her in my arms. "Everything is going to be just fine, honey. Shh…" I whispered into her hair.

"I feel like the world's most rotten person," she said, wiping away the tears tracking their way down her face.

"You're not. You did the best thing for Norah. And I'm not saying that just because you chose me in the end, either," I replied. "You wanted the best life for our daughter. And so this is how things simply worked out. I love you, Bella. I'm head over heels in love with you. And I just want you to be happy," I said, kissing her forehead.

"The last few days have been an emotional rollercoaster," she said. "I've had a baby, broken up with my husband, had hormonal mood swings, had _incredible_ sex with my baby daddy, went into labor in his bed, and then drove 200 mph from La Push to Forks. I have a headache," she proclaimed.

"_Incredible_ sex, eh?" I teased her.

"Don't let it go to your head. I'm remaining celibate for the next six weeks," she said, sighing.

"Well, it sounds like you have had a _very_ long, exhausting, exciting week," I said. "If you want, you can sleep in the spare bedroom next to the nursery when we go back home."

"Why would I want to do that?" she asked, looking at me with wide eyes. "I can't sleep with you?"

I nearly choked.

"Well, I need to call someone and get them to get me a new mattress… since there's amniotic fluid all over the one Sue left."

Bella blushed. "I'm really sorry about that," she said, looking guilty.

"Don't be," I said, brushing it off. "It's not like it's something you had any control over."

"Yeah, but still…" Bella trailed off.

"I'm going to call Sam and see if he can find someone on the reservation that has an extra king-size mattress. If they don't then I'll see if I can find someone to give me a discount on one. I'll be right back, okay?"

"Alright," Bella said. "Can you bring the baby to me?" she asked.

"Sure," I said, picking the baby up out of the incubator and setting her in her mother's arms.

I headed toward the door.

"Jake, wait," she said.

I turned around quickly.

"What?" I asked her.

"I was thinking," she said slowly. "We haven't filled out the paperwork for Norah's name yet…"

"Yeah," I said blankly, wondering what she could be getting at.

"Do you think we could change it?" she asked. "I mean, her middle name, not her first name."

"Why?" I asked her, confused.

"I just thought of something that might flow a little better… and it kind of sounds like your name."

"What?" I asked, coming back over and sitting down.

"I think she looks like a Norah Jane," she said, looking down at the baby.

"I actually really like that," I said. In reality, I really didn't want to name the baby after Alice, no matter how nice she had been to Bella and me. She was still a bloodsucker.

"Really?" Bella breathed. "I was just looking at her and I just… I don't think she looks like a Norah Alice. I think she looks like a Norah Jane. I mean, I know it's kind of late in the game to up and change – "

I broke her off with a kiss.

"Whatever you want to name her," I said, leaning in and kissing her briefly. "That's fine with me. Let me go out and make a few phone calls about that mattress and I'll be back in here in a second."

I pulled out my phone and went out into the hallway, Bella's cell phone in my hand.

* * *

That night, while Bella was fast asleep, I took the time to really get to know my daughter. Bella had her inside her for nine months, so I figured she got the chance to know her just a little more than I did. I was amazed at how thick and soft Norah's hair was, how her eyes were shaped exactly like Bella's, how her skin was just a shade lighter than mine, how if I put my finger next to her cheek, she would nuzzle it and start sucking. I was in complete awe of the little girl in my arms.

I sat in the rocking chair in the corner of the room.

"Look, Norah," I said to the baby. "Mommy's sleeping."

I received a wide open yawn in return.

"Yeah, I know. I bet you're tired too," I said, turning on the radio just loud enough for me to hear.

A song by John Mayer was playing. It was too appropriate. I began to sing along, rocking the chair to the rhythm of the song.

_I know a girl; she puts the color inside of my world.  
__But she's just like a maze, where all of the walls are continually changed.  
__And I've done all I can to stand on the steps with my heart in my hand.  
__Now I'm starting to see, baby's got nothing to do with me._

_Fathers, be good to your daughters.  
__Daughters will love like you do.  
__Girls become lovers, who turn into mothers,  
__So mothers, be good to your daughters too._

I looked up and Bella was staring at me, a small smile playing on her lips.

"What?" I mouthed.

"I knew you'd be a good daddy. And I knew Norie'd be a daddy's little girl," she laughed.

"I can't help it," I said, looking back down at the baby in my arms. "I'm starting to see what you meant by wanting to give her everything," I added softly.

"What I did earlier today, I had to do it for her. She's the one who gave me the strength to do it. Otherwise, I'd probably still be bouncing back and forth and around between the two of you. Norah just sort of tipped the odds in your favor," Bella laughed.

"Well, I guess I'm doubly glad she's here, then," I said. I got up and walked over to Bella and put Norah back in her arms. I placed a soft kiss on her lips. The song was still playing.

_So fathers, be good to your daughters.  
__Daughters will love like you do.  
__Girls become lovers, who turn into mothers,  
__So mothers, be good to your daughters too._

* * *

_So, I kinda wanted the EB breakup scene to have its own chapter. Sorry if this seemed kind of rushed. :/_

_Please review! The epilogue will be posted next chapter. However, I am currently on Chapter 7 of the sequel... so look forward to that pretty soon. :)_

_xoxo_


	18. Hallelujah

Chapter 18 – Hallelujah

* * *

Disclaimer: I do not own Jacob Black. I do not know where he is. If I did, he never would have fallen in love with Bella Swan. It would have been me instead.

* * *

I never realized that the birth of my daughter was going to change my life in so many ways. I'd never realized that someone other than Bella could captivate my heart and soul in such a fashion. It was absolutely amazing. I hadn't realized how much I was going to enjoy being a father. The anticipation and nervousness I had felt in the days preceding Norah's birth had completely dissipated and was replaced with this new ecstatic feeling. I'd talked to Billy about it all and he'd given me my grandmother's engagement ring so that I could propose to Bella "when the time was right." Life was starting to have a definite upswing.

We brought Norah home two days later to see nearly all of La Push parked outside the house. Bella's shocked expression was one that I'll never forget. Of course, Alice had decorated the house with pink and white streamers. A big stork was stuck out front with Norah's full name, birthday, and how much she weighed on the little baby bundle hanging from the stork's beak.

"Oh no," Bella murmured as we pulled up. "Oh no, oh no, oh no… no, she didn't do this!"

"What?" I asked Bella innocently.

"This has Alice written all over it!" she gasped. "But Alice isn't allowed on the reservation!"

"True," I said, shrugging. "But Alice and I got to know each other a little better while we were waiting on Norah to get here and she called and asked if I could let her onto the reservation to decorate the house for you and I saw no reason to deny her that request."

Bella just gaped at me.

"Alice… was here?" she gasped.

I simply nodded. I parked Bella's Mercedes in the driveway and everyone started cheering.

"Welcome home!" everyone shouted with glee.

Bella leaned in and kissed me on the cheek. She sighed and got out of the car. I got out and pulled out Norah's car seat from the backseat.

We headed into the house, followed by all of the neighbors. I sat the car seat in the middle of the living room and leaned down and pulled my daughter out of it, cuddling her close to me. She yawned sleepily and burrowed herself closer to my chest. Bella smiled at me and grabbed a camera out of the diaper bag and snapped our picture.

"I want this to go in her nursery," she said, smiling. She sighed contentedly.

"What?" I asked her.

"This just feels _right_," she said, coming over and hugging me. She kissed Norah on her forehead.

"Well, that's good," I said awkwardly.

"Aww…" everyone said, walking into the living room from outside.

I held Norah with my right hand and grabbed Bella's with my left and led her into the nursery. I sat her in the crib and Bella grinned.

"She's finally home," she said, a look of utter peace and contentment on her face.

"True," I said, pulling her close to me. "But I'm even more excited that _you're _finally _home_," I replied. "And that you're actually calling it what it really is_. _You have no idea how long I've waited for this."

I paused for a second and made sure no one was lurking out the door. They were all waiting in the living room.

"I kind of got you something," I said.

"No, Jacob! I don't want anything!" she said, shaking her head. "You already got me the necklace, thanking me for having Norah. I don't need anything else!"

"Yeah, but I think you'll like this gift," I said, smiling.

"I don't like surprise gifts," Bella said, shaking her head in defiance.

"Will you just be quiet so I can do this?" I asked her.

"Do what? I don't want a gift! I don't want – "

She stopped suddenly as I got down on one knee, looking up at her, gauging her reaction, taking in every expression on her face.

"Jake, what are you – "

"You told me that you wanted to give Norah everything you never had. I'm in love with you, Bella. I love you more than life itself. You're my everything now. You and Norah are my family. Bella, will you marry me?" I asked, hoping for the best.

Bella's jaw simply dropped. She gaped at me for a whole five seconds.

"You want to marry me?" she asked. "Jake, we've never even talked about this… and I'm still technically married to Edward. The divorce is going to take a while to finalize…"

I knew she was still married to Edward, but I hoped that she would feel differently now that they were separated and she had chosen me. I closed the ring box and sighed.

"Bella, I just figured – "

"Jake, what are you doing?" she asked me, frowning.

"Umn, putting the ring away to ask you later, after the divorce goes through?" I said hesitantly.

"No, you're not," she said. "I was just making sure you knew that we couldn't actually get married until the divorce was finalized.""And I know that already," I replied.

"Ask me again then," she said.

"Wait, what?" I said, confused.

"Ask me to marry you again," she said breathlessly, her face betraying no sign of confusion or anxiety.

It was my turn to gape at her. I shook my head to clear my thoughts.

"Fine, don't then," she said, turning around to face the crib.

"Bella," I sighed. I got down on one knee behind her.

"If you don't want to, then don't," she said.

"Bella!" I exclaimed, growing frustrated.

"What?" she asked. She turned around and saw me back down on my knee, with the ring box open again.

"Isabella Marie… Cullen? Swan? I don't know what to call you," I laughed. "Will you do me the honor of becoming my wife?"

Bella smiled.

"Yes!" she exclaimed.

I jumped up onto my feet and she jumped into my arms and I kissed her deeply. I had envisioned this moment for years. This is what I wanted more than anything and I had it. I had my… _fiancée_ and my daughter, a new house, a place for us all… everything I had ever wanted. I didn't think it could get any better than this.

"Norie?" Bella cooed to the baby in the crib. "Mommy and Daddy are getting married!" she exclaimed.

"Mommy and Daddy, huh?" I asked, smiling. "I think I could get used to this."

"You better," she said, feigning a tone of warning. "Pretty soon, she'll be talking and walking and then there will be boys… Are you ready for all of that?"

"You bet," I said, wrapping her into my arms once more. "I've got the shotgun out on the front porch."

"Jake!" Bella laughed, swatting me with the back of her hand. I pulled her close to me and kissed her one more time. "Norah's going to be a daddy's little girl, isn't she?" she asked me.

"Of course," I said. "She's the best thing anyone could have ever given me."

"You've really grown up over the last few months," Bella said, looking up at me. "I never really expected you to… rise to the occasion, I suppose."

"I kind of had to," I said, shrugging my shoulders. "I'm a dad now. You and Norah are going to be relying on me. I have to be there for you. And I promise you, Bella. I will _never_ let you or Norah down. Not now and not ever."

"I know," Bella said, sighing. She looked back over at our daughter in her crib. I wrapped one arm around her waist and we just stood there, looking at the miracle that we had created, realizing that the journey of the last nine months had forever changed us both.

***

_Somehow everything's going to fall right into place,_

_If we only had a way to make it all fall faster every day,_

_If only time flew like a dove._

_We've got to make it fly, faster than I'm falling in love._

_*_

_This time we're not giving up._

_Let's make it last forever, screaming "Hallelujah!"_

_We'll make it last forever._

_*_

_Holding onto patience wearing thin,_

_I can't force these eyes to see the end._

_If only time flew like a dove,_

_We could watch it fly and just keep looking up._

_*_

_This time we're not giving up._

_Let's make it last forever, screaming "Hallelujah!"_

_We'll make it last forever._

_*_

_We've got time on our hands._

_We've got nothing but time on our hands._

_Got nothing but, got nothing but,_

_Got nothing but time on our hands._

_*_

_This time we're not giving up._

_Let's making it last forever, screaming "Hallelujah!"_

_Hallelujah…_

_Hallelujah…_

* * *

_The end!_

_I've got the first few chapters of the sequel done. I'll have the first chapter posted here in a few days. :) I just have to figure it all out and things. Get it sorted right in my head. LOL._

_I want to thank each and every one of my reviewers and those who put this story on their alerts. You guys have been absolutely amazing. So give yourself a round of applause. haha. :) I never expected this story to get so many reviews or for people to love it as much as they do. Writing this has been an incredibly wonderful experience and I am so thankful for it. I've made a lot of really great friends because of it and I'm sad to end it here. But there IS a sequel! So it's not really goodbye... it's more of a "see you later."_

_Thanks for reading!!_

_Much love.  
xoxo_


	19. Author's Note Sequel

**A/N:** For those of you who don't know, the sequel to this story is now up and running. It's called _Jacob's Promise _and you can find it on my profile. :)

_xoxo_


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